


Snow White and the Android Prince

by cockabeetle, Kymopoleia



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Nightwing (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, Fluff and Smut, Kidnapping, M/M, Piercings, Tattoos, The boys are dumb
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-09
Updated: 2014-07-07
Packaged: 2018-02-04 00:20:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 43,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1760567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cockabeetle/pseuds/cockabeetle, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kymopoleia/pseuds/Kymopoleia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As Damian lays back on the bed, watching Tim come closer against the gauzy pink background, it feels like a dream. Like that one time Mom made him take something weird and he dreamt about heaven. Sure, it's much pinker, but it's still perfect. Damian reaches upwards for Tim's hands, wanting to make sure this is still real, that this isn't a repeat of that dream, because dreams end and he doesn't want this to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> You'll find out below what this is. It's cavity-inducing fluff, and it's a fun non-hero AU.

Damian looked around the manor as he followed his father, mouth curled upwards in pleasure at the house. It was different from his grandfather's home, so westernized and white, but it felt grander somehow. Very... Rococo, with gold filigree and portraits of rich white men and women. His family, he thinks. Bruce is saying something now, so he turns his attention to it.

"This will be your room, across from your brother Tim's. Your other brother Dick's is a couple doors down, as is Jason's old room." Bruce spoke softly, smiling at his flesh-and-blood son. His other children were just as important, and had been made to look and act as human as possible.

Damian's smile falters, and he stops walking. "Mother did not tell me I have siblings."

Bruce laughs quietly. "Not full siblings, they are actually... all adopted, I guess you could say."

He nods. "I understand. She said you had a kind heart." he glances at the room that had been indicated as his own. "Is there anything else you need to show me, Father?"

Bruce smiles softly. "Alfred or one of your brothers will come get you when dinner is ready. It shouldn't be long. If you need me, I'll be in the study"

Damian nods again, and pauses. "May I hug you, Father?" he knows it's silly to ask, but he has only just met him, and a week ago Bruce didn't know he had another son at all. He doesn't want to make his father uncomfortable, he just wants that moment of comfort for the adjustment to western lifestyle, and to living apart from his mother. Everything is new, and everything will be okay, as long as he has father.

Bruce responds with a smile, wrapping an arm around Damian's shoulders. "You don't need to ask, son. If you want a hug, then take one. If you're in need of comfort, find me or one of the boys. According to your other siblings, Dick gives the best hugs"

"I'll have to remember that." He says, looking up at his father. "How old are my... Brothers?"

"Dick is the oldest, and Tim is just a few years older than you."

"What about the other one you mentioned, Jackson? Jason?" Damian also remembered that Bruce had said "old room". "Did something happen to him?"

"Jason. He's three years younger than Dick. He... had a rough time, and ran away. There was an... accident."

"Is it best not to ask about it?"

Bruce nodded slowly. "If you're curious, Alfred or Dick might be able to explain it better. I'll be heading to my study now, son. Enjoy yourself until dinner, alright?" 

Damian nodded and turned back to the doorway with large white doors and... Is that gold inlay? Faux gold paint? He decides it doesn't matter, because just having a *door* will be weird, after a lifetime of paper walls.

Bruce makes his leave, and Tim, coming up from helping Alfred with something, sees his new 'sibling'.

"Greetings. Are you lost?"

"I feel that way, but I am not." He tears his gaze from the door- just thinking about it is weird- and sizes up the boy. "Would I be wrong in assuming you are Tim?"

"Timothy Drake-Wayne, at your service. Are you Damian?"

"Yes, that would be me." He smiles. "Is this house normally so quiet? I enjoy my fair share of silence but," he looks around. "I think I will go mad if it is this silent all the time."

"Dick is out of town, and Bruce doesn't tend to generate much noise. It's gotten better, but we were worse back when Jay first left." Tim scratched the back of his neck. "When Dick finally gets back and meets you, you'll be wishing it was this quiet, believe me"

"I'm used to living with hundreds of men and women trained in the art of taking lives and playing pranks, can one man truly be so bad?" he cocks an eyebrow.

Tim laughs. "Dick is... He's an experience. He's a prototype, even if he won't admit it, and Bruce was lonely when he was made. Dick is also a human octopus and has no concept of personal space"

Damian is confused by the other's wording, but ignores it. "So he's the... Hugging type?" Damian has always been one for hugs, but too many made him uncomfortable. He guessed he was like a cat, only comfortable with attention when he sought it out.

Tim laughed. "And kissing, petting, holding, chattering, joking, picking up and swinging you around, etc. He's a very touchy-feely kind of guy"

Nodding, Damian could imagine it. "Does he look like you and father?" he suddenly realizes that both Bruce and Tim share blue eyes and black hair, as well as that same shade of never-seen-sun skin. It makes him just the slightest bit subconscious about his own green eyes and eastern skin, but he puts those feelings away until he knows if they're justified or not.

"Dick's skin is darker than ours, he was designed to be a Circus brat, afterall. His hair and eyes are similar to mine, but his hair is longer and his eyes are lighter"

Damian nods, once again ignoring the weird wording. "What do you normally do to pass the time?"

"I'm very good with computers, which is no surprise. Jason used to read, and Dick has at least three rooms dedicated to TV and video games"

"Is there a gym?" He asks, thinking about the sword his mother would be sending him, and about how he'd be expected to keep his figure, even in this new place. "I enjoy reading too, and I assume there is a library?"

"There are two libraries, And if you can't find a book you can check Jay's old room. Bruce refuses to go in there but I'm sure no one will mind you grabbing the books. The gym is downstairs, in the cave"

"Could you show me the cave, tomorrow?" Damian smiles again, and he is well aware that he doesn't normally smile this much. "And I look forwards to these libraries. It'll give me even more of a chance to practice reading English. That's not something I'm always as good at." he admits the last part after a slight hesitation.

Tim nods. "My pleasure. If you wish, I can speak Arabic with you. I was programmed with it as one of my starting languages, as well as English and French"

"I'll pretend the last bit of technobabble makes sense if you teach me what you mean sometime." his smile turns sheepish, because he doesn't have that much of a background in technology, or the words used in it. Arabic is both easier and harder, but English is... A nightmare. English words describing something he is not proficient in? Even worse.

Tim laughs. "Technobabble is one thing, but I assure you I've been trying to keep my words simple. I simply meant that if you so desired, I could speak with you in a tongue you understand better. All of our brothers can, and Alfred knows more languages than we do"

He shook his head. "Thank you, but no thank you. I need to practice your confusing language, and become as well acquainted with it as I am with Arabic."

Tim nods. "I understand. Humans need to practice, otherwise the skill deteriorates"

Damian's brow furrowed in confusion, but he was sure that was just a weird way to say it. "If it's alright with you, I'll check out the room now, I wish to see if it's as... pastel as the rest of the house."

"If you don't like all the white, you can paint it. Dick's is done in the colors of a certain bird, and Jay's is red. I just put posters up to cover the walls"

"I'm not used to white. I've never been a fan of Rococo, my taste is much more... Eastern." he chuckled. "It feels like home."

"Tell Alfred. He's both like our Mother and Grandfather and if you'd like a certain furniture style he'd be the best at procuring it for you"

Damian nodded. "I'll be sure to do so. Thank you for speaking with me, by the way." He smile again. "It's nice to feel welcome. Things are so different in the west, you know?"

Tim nods. "I did some soul searching, recently, and I've gotten very familiar with Middle-Eastern styles. I might ask Alfred to help with some upgrades... Well, Dinner'll probably be done in a few minutes. I'll see you down stairs?"

"If I have that little time, then there's no point in looking inside." He joked, turning from the door and taking a few steps towards the other. "Promise you'll help me find the hallway and my room after dinner?"

Tim nods. "My room is right across the hall, if you have any questions tonight. But remember to knock, don't know what you'll walk in on" 

Damian thought about it for a few seconds too long and couldn't stop the blush from coming to his face, and nodded. "I will try to remember. I'm used to paper walls, how many get-out-of-prison cards does that give me?"

"For each of us? Two."

"I understand. One last thing, are we required to wear shoes in the house?" he glanced down at his own with distaste, used to only putting on shoes for training or going outside.

Tim shrugs. "It's up to you. Alfred is never seen without a full Tuxedo unless it's a special occasion. Shoes included, but you don't need to live up to his standards, no one can match them"

Damian had begun kicking the shoes off the moment Tim had finished the first sentence, then the socks followed after the last. "Good thing there is only one I look to impress." he said as nonchalantly as possible, though the list was actually just a bit larger than that.

"If you're referring to Bruce, then I can assure you you've met his standards. You haven't even commented on how weird his tastes or his 'children' are yet" Tim smiles a little wider. "Plus, you're family. Bruce loves his family"

"His tastes are nothing strange at all, compared to some of the people whose company Ra's keeps. Trust me, avoiding men like them was like comparing a hand in water to a hand in fire."

Tim shrugged. "Our half-built siblings in the cave beg to differ"

"Half-built?" he asks, but is interrupted by the sight of a man in full suit and bow tie down the hall. "Yes?"

Tim smiles. "Hello Alfred"

"Master Timothy, Master Damian. Master Bruce is waiting for you at the Table for Dinner. I trust you'll lead our newest family member downstairs safely, Master Timothy?"

Damian nodded. "I trust that he will. Thank you for telling us."

Alfred bowed, before disappearing downstairs. Tim grinned. "You've got some clue to what I meant, though, don't you?" He asked, as he lead the way to the Dining room.

"None at all. Is there some out-joke?" his eyebrows furrow in confusion.

"No joke, I assure you. How familiar are you with Robotics?"

"Not very? Are you sure there is no joke?"

Tim smiles, and raises a hand, detaching a finger as proof. "No joke"

Damian stumbles, falling onto the floor in surprise. Since his balance is normally impeccable, this is even more shocking, and he ends up just staring up at Tim, wide eyed in wonder and further confusion. "What- what in all the circles of hell-"

"Bruce's only flesh-and-blood son is you." Tm attaches his finger again. "I was hoping you'd catch on if i dropped hints, but..." Tim shrugs. "Dick denies it and Jason figuring it out led to him running away. I'm ok with it though"

"So you are... Not real? I don't fully understand." His eyes search Tim's face for some answer, but none present themselves.

"I was not born, and am not human, but I like to think I'm real. Wouldn't you?"

"Yes, I just... This is all so much. Are all westerners like this? So confusing?"

"Bruce is more confusing than others. My experience is limited, afterall. Most people outside the family don't know we're Robots, though. Bruce calls us Androids"

"Androids." the word is unfamiliar, heavy on his tongue. "You will have to teach me about yourself soon, so I can understand. I'm still having trouble. I understand the concept, it's just... The mechanics?" he shrugs, and starts to stand.

Tim nods. "I'll explain as best I can. Androids are robots designed to look and act human. Most are not told they are not in fact human. I wouldn't bring up the topic with Dick though, he denies it vehemently"

"Were you told?"

"I figured it out on my own"

"And the other brother, Jason? What was his situation? Is he alright on his own?"

"Jason had an existential crisis. He died."

Damian falters. "He... Died?" though he never knew the man, robot, android *person*, his loss feels as personal as anything else. If Bruce cared for him, then it was personal.

Tim nods. "We had a funeral. Bruce has been dealing very well, and learning about you has helped. Dick's been keeping himself busy so as to keep his mind from wandering. I saw it coming."

 Damian nods, and smells something fantastic. He remembers dinner, and his eyes widen. "We are late?"

Tim shrugs. "Bruce is usually the only one to eat, given our... constitution. Westerners usually set the table and wait for the other to arrive as well. They probably did not expect us to get here immediately either, don't fret"

He nods. "I still feel bad, eating alone is never fun. Shall we join Father?"

"Oh, Bruce probably hasn't started yet. And dinner's always been a time of talking together. But let's"

Damian nods again and follows his brother, trying not to watch his gait for some tell-all sign of his difference from Damian's self. It's hard, but he'd like to think he succeeds.

Tim sits down at Bruce's left, where there is no food placed. Bruce is waiting, hands clasped in front of his mouth, he's looking at Tim expectantly. On Bruce's right is an open chair with food placed in front of it, identical to the setting in front of Bruce.

Damian slides into that chair, looking around for some confirmation that this is the right answer. He considers grabbing a fork, but Father's refusal makes him hesitate.

Bruce smiles at Damian. "Tim. You didn't tell me you'd gone to see your brother."

Tim whistles innocently.

"Was our meeting unplanned? Or was it meant to be planned?" his eyebrow quirks up, and he decides that if the answer is the second of the two, he'll admire Tim's sneaky method and personality all that much more.

Bruce sighed. "He was supposed to wait until we'd had formal introduction before meeting with you. Obviously he didn't wait."  
Tim continued to whistle. Bruce snorted. "How much did he tell you?" He asked, as he picked up a fork, motioning for Damian to begin eating as well.

Damian shrugs as he picks up a fork as well. "Not much that I truly comprehend, but probably more than you wanted me to hear."

Bruce sighs. Tim pouts. 

"You can't possibly be surprised, Bruce."

"Where's the cute little kid who hid behind me every time something new happened?"

"He grew up"

"If everything here is so new, I may need to hide." Damian remarks offhandedly.

Bruce chuckles, and Tim snickers. Tim waves a hand. "If you were so prone to hiding You'd probably have done it already. Or run away screaming"

"Tim."

"I'm not wrong"

"I think part of me is looking forward to going to sleep and pretending that I don't know anything for several hours." he admits.

Tim nods. "Have fun."

"I will, thank you." He takes a bite of the steak, and he cannot help but close his eyes appreciatively. Foods back with Ra's tended to be bulk foods, like soup and salad. And bread. For years and years, everything was soup. But now it might not all be soup. "May I make a request?"

Bruce hums, looking up at Damian. Tim cocks his head.

"Please don't prepare soup dishes until I am homesick."

Alfred nods, making note of it in a little notebook. Bruce hums again.

"Thank you, I, I have had every combination of soup you can imagine, and then a few you would probably not rather imagine." he shuddered, remembering the disastrous tomato, turkey, and onion soup that had been tried a few years before, and the bean, orange, ham, and basil combination from last month. Not their cook's finest moments.

Tim blinks, and Bruce wrinkles his nose. Alfred nods making another note.

"This steak is delicious!" he says, changing the topic.

Bruce nods. "As always, Alfred." 

"The flattery is appreciated, Master Bruce, Master Damian."

"If you cook everything as well as this, then I look forwards to my time here even more." Damian nods appreciatively.

Alfred bows. "Thank you, Master Damian." 

Bruce chuckles softly, smiling.

Damian eats the rest of his meal in silence, halfway looking forwards to seeing his room and halfway dreading it.

Tim's eyes flicker, as he shifts. He looks at Alfred. "When is Dick supposed to be getting back into Gotham again?"

"Master Richard shall be returning in the morning Master Timothy"

"So I'll have a chance to meet him over breakfast tomorrow?" Damian asks, hoping that it goes well.

Bruce nods. Tim grins. 

"He'll like you. He's like an oversized puppy. He likes everyone"

"A puppy?" he asks, thinking back to his time back home. "I can deal with dogs." he smiled, a thought coming to mind. "Father, do you or Alfred have any allergies? Why are there no animals?"

Tim speaks up. "No allergies, but animals have a tendency to swallow small parts. Bad for both parties, that"

"And if an animal were trained not to do that?" he cocked an eyebrow.

Tim shrugged. "If you would like a pet, I'm sure Dick would be happy to take you shopping. I still have some things to deal with before I'm ready to face the Paparazzi"

Damian blinks, and realizes how desperate he must sound. "Sorry I am not that excited, I simply attract animals, and wanted to make sure that would not be an issue?" he smiled sheepishly and shrugged. "No need to waste money purchasing pets when they come to me already."

Tim grinned, turning to Bruce. "If he's Snow White does that make you the King? Can Selina be the Evil Queen?"

"And what does that make you? The prince? A dwarf?" Damian shot back. "I thought there were seven of them."

"I could be a suitor. Or maybe one of the Evil Queen's henchman!"

"You? A henchman? You seem more the brains of an operation than a blind follower and subject."

Tim shrugs. "A spy, then." He thought. "Would I be spying for the Queen or for the Dwarves? Would Dick be a dwarf?"

"Dick sounds like every dwarf all at once." Damian snickers. "From what you said, he is certainly loud enough!"

Tim laughed. "D'ya think he's just the seven, all stacked up on top of one another? He's tall enough"

"Alfred, please tell me we have an apple pie to fuel this nonsense." Bruce says as he takes a cup of coffee from him. 

"I'll tell you when I see him! If you're a spy though, who are you spying on?"

"Obviously I'm spying on Bruce and Alfred, feeding the information I gather to whoever asks"

"Would you tell me if I asked?" Damian asked, one eyebrow raised.

Alfred disappears, coming back into the room with two slices of pie in hand. 

"We have Apple and Blueberry pie, sir"

Tim thought a moment. "Can you pay my price?"

"Apple, please. Well, for them. I'll take the blueberry, thank you." Bruce smiled warmly and reached for the slice. 

"What's the price?" Damian smiles, and leans over the table farther.

Tim grins. "We'll discuss price in private, dear brother. Thank you, Alfred, but please give my slice to Damian"

"Trying to make me sleep forever, are you?" Damian asks, chuckling and taking the slices. "Thank you Alfred, I will be eating these in my rooms. Tim, feel free to join me to discuss prices." As he speaks, he stands and casts a look at Tim with a wide smile that is much less brotherly than it really should be. He hopes his father doesn't mind, but as nothing bad as happened so far, he doesn't believe anything bad will. Hopefully.

Tim nods, and Alfred bows, bidding them to have fun. Bruce mumbles about how odd Tim has grown to be. Tim sticks his tongue out.

Damian turns to walk back to his room, plates in hand and hips swinging just the slightest bit- he can't help it if he uses atleast one etching his mother taught him, he enjoys Tim's company.

Tim flounces up behind Damian, grinning widely.

Damian pretends he doesn't hear him, and when he gets to the door that is probably his, he sighs exaggeratedly. "My hands are so full, how could I possibly open this door?"

Tim walks up behind him, standing so there's little more than a breath between them. He leans down, whispering in Damian's ear. "All you have to do is ask"

Damian's back arches forwards and he bites his lower lip to keep whatever squeak of surprise in- he doesn't squeak, he definitely doesn't squeak- and a shiver runs through him. "Please o-open the door?"

Tim reaches past Damian's side, fingers brushing lightly, before turning the knob and opening the door. Tim's grin widens, at the stutter.

Damian can't find any words, so he just leans back against Tim for a second before going inside the-

Fucking hell the room was violently pink. He nearly drops the plates at the suddenness of it, and how *pink* it really is. He doesn't hate the color, it's just that he's never felt assaulted by a shade before. "Oh dear Allah, Tim..."

Tim blinks. An arm wraps around Damian's waist, but Tim is glancing around the room. 

"...So this is the room Cass used to sleep in"

"Part of me literally hurts from how pink this room is." he says, eyes fixed on the huge bed, and the pink gauzy curtains surrounding it.

"...Wanna try my room? I promise there is a lack of pink or any one color"

"I can stand the pink..." he starts, forcing his head away from the scene. "Besides, weren't we just using a Disney princess analogy? Is this not as disney as it gets?"

"...true" Tim hums. He presses his mouth to Damian's neck, humming softly.

Damian's eyes close, and he leans against Tim, biting his lip again. "Will I have a chance to eat this pie?"

Tim hums. "Perhaps"

"Will you keep me too preoccupied? I can live with that, but it seems a shame to leave the pie."

"Alfred has more where that came from, and it'll all taste wonderful, I'm sure" Tim drawls, hand playing with the hem of Damian's shirt.

"Then may I set it down somewhere? This is nice, but I don't want to hold them forever. Father has very heavy plates."

"China. Fine porcelain plates are called China" Tim responds, taking one from Damian and gently placing it on the nightstand.

"Why are they named after a country, that doesn't make any sense?" his brow furrows.

Tim shrugs. "Don't have that information, sorry"

Damian sets down the other plate, and turns to wrap his arms around Tim's shoulders. "Tell me when you do."

Tim hums. "I'm sure Alfred knows. Him and Jay were full of arbitrary knowledge"

"I'm sure, but I don't want to ask him. Asking you is much easier."

Tim smirks. "Is that so...?" Tim's arm wraps around Damian's waist again, the other cradling the back of Damian's neck. He paused.

"I've never actually kissed someone, I'm not sure how pleasant my tongue-substitute is. I should have thought of that..."

Damian rolled his eyes. "You think I've kissed anyone but my mother before? I don't know how to kiss well, I was under the impression we'd just shut each other up and hope for the best."

"I was speaking in terms of awkward metal pinching, but..."

Damian leaned forwards and kissed Tim, his lips pressing against the other's. If he didn't know they weren't synthetic, nothing would have clued him in. A few seconds later, Damian pulls back and glances at Tim. "Was that an ok first kiss?"

Tim blinked. "...It was pleasant." He moved forward then, so they were nose to nose. "May I try something?"

"If you think I can handle it." He replies, trying not to move back or lean in.

Tim smirks, before pressing their mouths together. He dragged his tongue across Damian's lips.

Damian opens his mouth, curious to see where this is going. His eyes close, and his hands hold onto Tim tighter because he's so focused on them that otherwise, he'd fall.

Tim is getting rather into the kiss, and assumed by Damian's reaction he was enjoying it as well, when the door slammed open.

"Timmy!! Why didn't you tell me our little brother had come home?? Alfred told me when I got home!"

Damian's eyes widened and he pulled out of the kiss, gasping for air and staring at the door in confusion. "Who- are you?" he glances back to Tim, then back at the person. "Is that?" his voice is a bit high, and stilted as he tried to remember how to put words in English together.

Tim sighed, long suffering. "Hello, *Dick*."

Dick raised his eyebrows. "Timmy. Tim, Tim, Timmy Tim. You know you can tell me anything, riiiiight?"

Damian is quiet for a long moment, before leaning into Tim and hanging onto him to stay standing, rather than falling from laughing too hard. "He does look like stacked dwarves!" he cackles. "5, at least!"

Tim smirks. "See?" Dick stands there, confused.

"Timmy, explain."

"Don't explain." Damian said, still giggling and holding onto Tim.

Tim nods. Dick pouts. His expressions are oddly over-exaggerated. "Dick, while it's nice to see you again, please get out. We were in the middle of something." 

"But *Timmy*. I can't just leave! You need to tell me *everything*"

Dick frowns. "But..." Tim glares, frowning at Dick.

"Out. Now." Dick's hands come up, showing he's unarmed. 

"Okay, okay, jeez. No need to pull out the eye-lasers. Where's the love, Timmy?"

"I'm borrowing it. Go." Damian made a shooing motion with his hand, wanting to giggle again at the look directed at him then.

Tim leered. Dick's eyes twinkled. "Timmy, when you're done...?"

"When I'm done you can smother him all you want, sure"

Damian watched his new brother leave the room with an evil gleam in his eye, and buried his face in Tim's shoulder. "I'm doomed." he groans.

Tim hummed. "He said when I'm *done*. Who says I'm ever going to be *done*?"

"Protect me from him?" Dami glances up at Tim and leans up to press their noses together again. "I don't want to suffocate in a hug with him."

Tim hums. "Of course, I won't abandon you. Unless Alfred calls. No one disobeys Alfred"

"If Alfred calls, I hide. Don't look for me, I'll find you."

Tim hums, nuzzling his cheek. "You might want help finding a hiding place, Dick's lived in the manor for over 20 years, he knows every nook and cranny."

"I doubt that, he's too tall. I can find and fit places he's only dreamed of."

Tim giggled. "I've seen Dick climb up and sit on top of the bookcase in his room. There's no more than half a foot of space up there"

Damian kisses Tim, shaking his head. "I'll have a head start, he won't know you've left my side for atleast a minute or two."

"Every room in this house is bugged."

"Then I'll go to town, or outside. The latter is tempting fate, a bear may think I'm the best company it ever had and want to come home."

"Dick used to have a pet elephant. I'm sure he could tame a bear." Tim hums softly. He presses a few kisses to Damian's throat. "I would submit to my fate and just let him hug me. The worst he can do is bruise a rib"

Damian leans against Tim again, letting the other support him. "Maybe."

Tim hums, sighing softly. "How far are we going? I forgot to ask that question earlier"

"I didn't think about it. I like this, the pace we have. It's nice."

Tim hums. "I agree. It's pleasant." He lets a hand play with Damian's shirt. "Though the number of clothes you still have on is rather vexing"

"You never took them off. Any regret is a lost chance of your own making, Tim." He looked up at him coyly.

"I could rip them off you."

"I happen to like this outfit. I've known it longer than I've known you." He glances down at said outfit, an the mint green button down, black vest, and black pants. It's nice, and he still remembers when mother brought it home for him.

"The start helping me remove it. There's a reason I don't wear many clothes with buttons, and it's because they tend to break when i mess with them"

Damian rolls his eyes as he pulls away from Tim do start undoing the buttons, and he leaves both layers on when he finishes unbuttoning them. He pushes a thumb under the waistband of his pants, and glances back at Tim. "Uh, these have a button too. Should I?"

"Do you want me below the waist?" Tim asks, grin firmly in place. He had not been kidding, he had plenty of ruined Dress Shirts to prove it, buttons were not safe from his fingers.

Damian shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant. "I wouldn't mind it."

Tim hums, eyes narrowing slightly. He pulls Damian's shirt and vest off his shoulders, mouth pressed to his throat. "It's your choice"

Damian finds himself leaning into Tim, like he seems to always do, and his fingers fumble with the button to get it undone. "It, it is." his voice is small, and the situation is perfect, and he can't imagine a better place (yes he can, a less pink place) or a better person to do this.

Tim hums. He pulls back, pulling his own plain T-shirt off easily. The long-sleeved shirt beneath it is pulled off afterwards. He removed Damian's upper layers, before dragging the younger boy to the bed. The atrociously pink bed. He'll have words with Cass later. Words.

As Damian lays back on the bed, watching Tim come closer against the gauzy pink background, it feels like a dream. Like that one time Mom made him take something weird and he dreamt about heaven. Sure, it's much pinker, but it's still perfect. Damian reaches upwards for Tim's hands, wanting to make sure this is still real, that this isn't a repeat of that dream, because dreams end and he doesn't want this to.

Damian lets out a sigh of pleasure, shifting to let Tim at his neck better- it feels nice- and squeezes his hand. His eyes are closed, too.

Tim hums, nipping lightly. It's about this point his hand starts wandering up Damian's chest, fingers tracing along his torso.

Damian's free hand wraps around Tim's chest, blunt nails scraping lightly. He doesn't think about how that might be taken, he just knows that he's ticklish, and that this is happening, and his back is arching up into each touch.

Tim sighs, at the feeling of the nails, his fingers skittering across Damian's stomach. He's about to actually try and *give* Damian a hickey when Dick coughs from the doorway. 

"Bruce says you aren't allowed to go any farther than making out until Damian's 18"

"Damian says you're either going to get out or I'll make you." Dami calls, voice breaking in the middle.

Tim snarls, loudly, and it's more than a little threatening. Dick scampers out of the room.

"I know I care about what Father thinks but right now I really want to completely disregard what he just said." He said softly, reaching up and staring at Tim's eyes. "I don't want to stop."

Tim hums softly. "While I would love to do just that, all rooms in the manor are bugged and most have video recording equipment. Also he'd probably shut me down if I did anything You're like three years younger than me. This is better than my crush on Dick was, but still"

Damian looks away and nods. "I guess." it hurts, but he understands. He doesn't want Tim to get shut down, he just doesn't want thing to end now. If only Bruce wasn't in charge... No, he can't think about that. He's fifteen.

"He did say making out was fair game though." Tim reminds him, grinning.

"Is it okay if we just cuddle?" he asks, glancing at the huge mirror across the room. "I'm not into the thought of my dad watching closely to see when making out becomes something more."

Tim hums softly. "If we're cuddling we can do it in my room, all this pink offends me"

Bruce's voice comes from somewhere generally downstairs: "The door better be left open young man"

"Is your room not bugged or something?" Damian cocks an eyebrow.

"I disabled them very early in my stay and he knows better than to try and set them up again. I'll take them apart and use them against him"

Damian nods. "Would you be opposed to the idea of carrying me there? I don't feel like walking."

Tim hums, standing up and stretching his back, before picking Damian up bridal style. "You're not as heavy as all your leaning led me to believe"

"Because when I lean I'm dragging you down with me, now I'm just..." he wraps his arms around Tim's neck. "And are you calling me heavy?"

"Mayyyyybe" Tim singsongs, he opens his door, to a room which is both somehow spotless and cluttered. Everything is put away and neat but it's also still messy. There are computer parts littering the desk, as well. Tim dumps Damian on the bed, and pulls off his hand, rolling the joint of his wrist between his fingers.

Damian groans, reaching for Tim. "Cuddle. Sleep. Now."

"Do you want my joints to lock because that is a thing they do." Tim informs him tiredly. He reattaches the hand, wriggling his fingers.

"I want you to stay comfortable and cuddle with me. Do you sleep?"

Tim shrugs. "Even if I were human I expect I'd be an insomniac. But i can power down for a while." He repeats the process with his other hand, before climbing into bed with Damian.

Damian latches onto him, becoming as closely attached as Tim said Dick normally did. Within minutes his eyes droop, and then Damian is a sleeping teenager on Tim's chest.

Tim sighs softly, going into sleep mode. He had a feeling they'd probably get rudely awoken in the morning, but really, what's new about that?


	2. Chapter 2

Powering on.

NO DON'T DO- wait. This is not the junkyard. A face is leant over his own, but the chin is not sharp, the nose is not long, the eyes are not gleaming evilly. It's a woman's face, but no face paint, no blonde pig tails. Brown hair. Curly brown hair. 

Glasses. She is focusing on- on *him*. She's staring so intensely, Jason can't- he can't-

He can't feel his limbs. Can't feel anything. Can't move his mouth. 

Is she smiling at his wide, fearful eyes? Is she saying something? A spark of pain, and he can hear again.

"-llo Dear, are you alright? Can you hear me?" Talia can see that he's scared, but she hopes he will calm down if she treats him normally. She'll send him home once she's done, Damian will be pleased to have his last brother home, won't he?

"Who are you where am I where is *he* what's going on" Jason finds he can move his lips now, can make them form the panicked words.

"My name is Talia Al Ghul, I saw you were... distressed, and thought I would help. You're in the Al Ghul Mansion, and I can promise none of our assassins will hurt you"

"Assassins?" his voice is high. "W-why can't I feel anything, I, I don't want to be paralyzed please tell me I'm fucking not I can't-" he breaks off with a shuddered breath.

"Shh, I'm not done fixing you up, you were coming to and I didn't want you to think you were still distressed. You're safe now. Once I'm done fixing you I'll send you back home to Gotham, is that alright?"

"Fixing me? Gotham? I, I don't know what you mean- are you really going to, to send me back home?" Gotham. Bruce. Home. Dick. Tim. Alfred. Dick. Bruce. *Home*.

"Yes, dear. I promise." Talia runs a hand through his hair, trying to help him calm down. "I sent my son to his father recently, and it's been very lonely here. I hope you'll keep in touch, too, once you've been sent home?"

"I, I guess?" he swallows, trying to ease his breathing. "Thank you, for, for helping me, I, I thought *he* was gonna kill me." Jason finds himself trusting the woman, Talia, because she's a mother, like, like Selina, and she's taking care of him, and, she's going to send him back *home*.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, dear. I promise it won't happen again. Do you want to stay conscious while I fix you up, or would you like to sleep? I promise to wake you once I'm done if it's the latter"

"Can you, can you tell me how long I've been out? How long I've been asleep? How dad is doing? What happened after, after that *man* tried to, tried to kill me?" Deep breaths. Getting a hold on himself, it helps.

"You left the house a little over three months ago, dear. They had a funeral, but so far they're trying. Your father is... coping, and meeting my son has helped, Damian's always been a good boy"

"A, new kid? Good, that house is, it's too big. B needs company. People. They help him." He smiles, but it's strained. "They think I'm, I'm dead?"

Talia nods, petting his hair. "I waited until you were awake to ask. Do you want me to pass the message or would you like it to be a surprise?"

"B, B wouldn't believe it unless he saw me. He, needs proof." he swallows, but the motion feels weirdly lacking. "What, what about the man?"

"Bruce wouldn't let me send any assassins to take care of him. Perhaps once you're home you can convince him?"

"I think, I don't think I was ever the target. He, he hates B. Wants to kill him. I, I don't want him endangering B, because B helps people, and he, he deserves more. I. I can take care of him, if you teach me how."

"Do you want me to, honey? I can, but it would take longer for you to get home"

"I don't want to go home if they're not safe. They're my family, and, an I can atleast do this much for them, right?" he smiles, eyes hopeful and sad.

"Damian was trained with our assassins, too. He can protect his family if needed, dear. But if this is what you want, I can teach you"

He nods. "I do, I want this. Thank you Talia, I, don't know how I can repay you for this."

"Just be happy, dear. You're a brother of my son, it's the least I can do"

"Thank you."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I used google translate for the thing and you'll know what when you get to it

Sometimes, when Tim is tinkering with a computer piece or something similar, he needs a better vantage point to see. He's also found that both his body and his head work even when they're not attached. So sometimes he puts his head on the desk and tinkers with whatever little project he's working on. He's pretty sure Bruce and Alfred know, and Dick might have walked in on him, but Dick's so far up De-Nile he's in the Mediterranean Sea. So Tim keeps his door closed when he does it to keep Dick from freaking out.

Damian had been at Wayne Manor for a few days now, and found that it was easy to set a routine and easy to slip into one. Wake up, either next to Tim or alone, go to the cave and do his morning routine, eat a late breakfast, call his mother, maybe read a book, bother Tim, go work on his sword skills, lunch, study whatever language he was interested in that day or talk to Father about his company and learn about it, bother Tim, dinner, and bother Tim or be bothered by Dick. Dick was the only variable, always changing up what he did and when he would show up.

Currently, it was after lunch, and Damian had a strong urge to go bother Tim. He hadn't seen him all day, and was looking forwards to seeing him. So he went across the hall from his room and opened the door. He didn't enter as quietly as he could have, so that was a miracle in of itself. And what he saw made him screech.

Tim's shoulders tense, and he nearly breaks the fragile piece of technology he's tinkering with. He glares at Damian through his peripherals. 

"This is why you knock"

"ماذا يجري لماذا هو رئيس مستقل بك كيف أنت تتحدث تيم" Damian screams in arabic. (WHAT IS GOING ON WHY IS YOUR HEAD DETACHED HOW ARE YOU SPEAKING TIM)

"....I think my brain might be wireless? Here, catch." Tim's arm hefts his head, and he tosses his head at Damian. If the little shit drops him, he is going to have words. Words of pain.

Damian does not, in fact drop the head, but he stares at it in fear and mild horror. "هذا لا معنى له، وكيف، كيف تفعلون هذا؟" (this doesn't make sense, how, how are you doing this?)

Tim shrugs, not that Damian is looking at his body. 

"I find it helps with my tinkering if I get a closer look. If you drop me I will end you"

Damian stares at him, biting his lip. He is still having trouble finding words, and having trouble just... comprehending. He never had issues before. "Tim, why not just keep the head on?" His voice is too loud and high, he never thought he'd be in this situation.

"I needed a better vantage point. I've been doing it this way for years."

Damian walks forwards and sets the head down on the bed, staring at him. He gives in and picks him up again, looking at the neck. "This is crazy."

"I thought we went over this the first day you got here. I'm a robot and I can detach and reattach all my body parts."

"Dick's also a robot but he's in Denial"

"E... everything?" Damian's eyebrow rises. "Literally?"

Tim's body pulls off his right arm at the shoulder and waves it at him.

"That is..." Damian reaches up and runs a hand through his hair. "How."

Tim huffs. His body reattaches the arm, and gently puts the project (it used to be a mainframe but it might be an arm now? He's not sure anymore) on the desk. He turns around and makes grabby hands at his head.

"What?" Damian is confused, and very tempted to go to his room and try to find some piece of literature he understands, like, like... Nothing. He can't read very much in english, and he seriously needs to fix this by the time he goes to school with americans.

"I'd like to have my head back now. I can't really move around very well without it." Tim's hands grab at his head again, looking impatient. Which is when Dick walks in.

"TimmyyyiiiiEEEEEEEEEEEE" Dick runs away crying.

Damian tentatively grabs Tim's head- his hair is really soft shit- and gives it to his body.

Tim reattaches his head and stands up.   
"I'm going to go do damage control, if I don't intercept him he'll probably run crying to Bruce. And we both know how well that will work out." Tim pecks his cheek as he goes to find Dick.

And Damian is left, uncomfortable, in his maybe-boyfriend's room. He turns and leaves the room, going to his own violently pink room to call his mom.

Talia is in the middle of reprograming Jason when her phone rings.

Tim found Dick in the second library curled up next to the fireplace. He lets Dick cuddle until Dick feels better.

"Mom why did you send me here I don't understand anything technology is confusing boys are confusing what do I do" he babbles in arabic to her.

She hums. "If your Grandfather wasn't so insistent you'd understand technology as well as your father does, honey. I'd meant to teach you, but Ra's was very adamant about it"  
She plays with Jason's hair, as the fighting styles and 'training' she's programmed upload to his brain.   
"Boys are all confusing dear, Girls too. It's what makes us people"

"But why do I have to like them, I don't understand anyone." he huffs.

She hums. "Just about everyone likes someone, dear. It's how the world works. So, tell me exactly what happened. I can't guarantee I can help but just talking about your problems makes you feel better"

"I kissed Bruce's son Tim a lot and I like him because he's interesting but I'm very confused because he's a robot and he can detach *everything* even his head and I don't know what to do mama"

"All of Bruce's sons but you are robots, dear. Though Tim has made it fairly clear he doesn't really think of Bruce as his father. Also, I'll be sending a surprise to you in a week or two. Pay attention o the directions, alright sweetie?"

"Okay mama. Did you know they cook things other than soup here?" he brightened.

She hums, Jason's almost finished loading. "Do they? What do they make?"

"Steaks! And mashed potatoes, rather than chunks in soup. And they make eggs and bacon too! I haven't had soup once, and the butler- Alfred- promised not to make any until I was homesick."

"Mm... That sounds wonderful, dear. From what I've gathered Alfred raised you father after your Grandparents on his side died. He's like a father to all of the children in that mansion, so I'm sure he'll take any of your requests to heart. Are you enjoying yourself?"

"I am, there is a huge library and a huge underground gym and I make my own schedule."

"That's great dear." All she has to do now is finish putting Jason together and she can ship him back to Gotham. Just as planned.

"What of you, mama? Anything interesting there?" Damian plays with the pale pink bed curtain as he asks, and prepares to sit down.

She hums. "Picked up a charity case. Soon he'll be up and ready for the real world again" She smiles to herself a little.

"Tt. What kind of fixer-upper is he? Moral or physical? If he's a moral fix you should have sent him to Father."

"Physical, dear. Moral will come later."

"Alright. Mother? What do I need to prepare for American school?"

"You'll be enrolled as a special needs child, since you're still learning English. You'll also be entering as a sophomore, so make sure you have some knowledge of the required courses up to that grade. I'm sorry I don't know all the speificss, dear"

"It's alright, that's more than I've heard otherwise. And... Thank you, mama. For everything. I wouldn't have gotten here without you."

"It's my pleasure, baby. Stay safe, momma loves you." She kisses at the phone.

Damian chuckles and nods. "I would tell you to stay safe, but you can take care of yourself better than anyone else I know."

She hums, and clicks the phone off. She's almost done reattaching Jason's last leg when he starts waking up.

Jason's eyes open slowly, and there a soft whirring barely audible next to his left ear, but just inside. He sees Talia hovering around his hips, her hands working something there that he is only beginning to feel. 

"Am I ready to go?" he asks, mouth quirked up at the memory of the last few months, and how she had taught him so much.

She hums. Just a few more adjustments...

"I'll be sending you to my son. I don't think we could actually feasibly send you over as a passenger on a plane, since you technically never left American soil and are in all accounts dead."

He nods. "Will I be asleep then?"

"Yes. My son will help you wake up and reconnect with your family"

He nods. "Thank you for helping me. Do you want me to come back sometime? I think I'd like to get to know you better, because it's the least I could do."

She pets his face. "Only if you want to, dear. It would be horrible of me to force you." She kisses his cheek, and stands up. "Let's see if I attached that correctly. C'mon, up." She pulls him to his feet.

Jason nearly stumbles, but her hands are the perfect lifeline. He smiles, and takes a step towards her. "I can feel everything!"

"Wonderful, dear! I'm glad." She smiles, patting his cheek.

Jason hugs her then, because he almost died and she saved him and he is just so fucking grateful to her that he, he can't handle it.

She pats his back laughing quietly. "It's the least I could do for you, dear. I'm glad it helped"

"If you ever need help, come to me, it's the only thing I can offer you. Thank you."

"Of course dear. Though I do have one teeny little request. My son will be going to his first year of American public schooling, can you help him with his English?"

Jason nodded as he pulled back. "Definitely, I can totally do that what language does he usually speak?"

"He's spoken Arabic all his life, he's just learning English now"

"Wow. English is awful, I can't imagine learning it so late."

"Yes... His Grandfather was very strict on his schooling up until I sent him to his father, at least now he has freedom to do as he pleases"

"I look forward to meeting him. What's his name?"

"Damian."


	4. Chapter 4

When Damian had been called up to his room by Alfred, he hadn't expected to see a giant crate there. The thick board of pine cross and overlap, and pieces of straw poke out of the cracks. It's hard to understand how it even got here, or who sent it to him, since it is clearly addressed to him.

Damian bids Alfred farewell and asks him to close the door, and covers the mirror so that he can have a semblance of privacy. 

Opening the crate takes a full ten minutes and ends in him using his grandfather's sword as a crowbar to get the top off. 

And of course, there's fucking straw in the way. He reaches through the straw, and, and his hand fucking meets fabric with something solid under it. 

Damian squeaks in surprise and rips the straw away, getting it all over his creamy pink carpet as he does. 

And there's a person in the box. Skin just warm enough, but still chilled, and face all sharp angles and oh hell those cheekbones are powerful. 

There is a mess of black hair on his head, and Damian finds himself touching it and finding that it is soft. His fingers trail down his face, and he finds something bunched up under his collar. 

Paper. He opens it, and it says in his mothers handwriting that, to wake the man up, he has to be touching him when he says "Peachblossom" in Arabic. 

He does, hands resting on the man's cheek, and a hand reaches up to grab his wrist. 

The movement is so sudden, and he is screaming as the man sits up, and a hand is clapped over his mouth and the man is talking to him.

Tim was heading across the hall anyway, because privacy isn't something normal in this house. The screaming makes him wrench the door open, to see Damian scrambling backwards with *Jason* on top of him and. 

"What the hell are you doing?"

Damian screams again, muffled by the hand on his mouth. Jason turns to see his brother, grinning. 

"Timmy?"

Tim raises an eyebrow. ".............I'm not going to ask how you're back. Would you get off of Damian? He's had enough scares this week." Tim sighs. "...It's nice to see you, though, Jay."

"Thanks. Did you say this was Damian? Shit, sorry kid." Jason removes his hand, and the teen squirms back until he hits the violently pink bed.

"Is this Cass' old room?" Jason asks, brushing straw off of his clothing.

Tim nods. "Yes. But for some reason Bruce felt the need to give it to Damian. Even though there are plenty of open rooms down the hall." He walks over to Damian, crouching next to him. He glances at Jason, and smiles a little. "Dick's gonna be ecstatic to know you're back, Jay. Bruce might even faint"

"I'm glad. Hey, kid, don't freak out on me please? It's great to meet you, your mom is awesome." he smiles and offers his hand to Damian, who tentatively takes it and shakes.

Tim snorts. "So she helped you come back?" He sitting cross-legged now, watching them meet 'officially'. 

"When are you and Dick going to stop calling me Timmy? It's undignified"

"Hmm... How about never, Timbo? You're our baby bird, of course we're gonna use nicknames ya hate. It's in our job description." he grins. 

"Welcome to the family, kiddo."  
Damian mods numbly, and glances back at Tim for advice.

"What are you looking at me for? Jason's nowhere near as bad as Dick. Maybe when Dick comes looking we can use him to escape." Tim grins a little, glancing at Jason slyly.

"Dick still lives here? Really? When do you think big bird will leave the nest?"

"Never." Tim huffs. "I've been thinking of getting an apartment though. I won't have to deal with him or people walking in on things they shouldn't"

"That was one time," Jason and Damian both began to say in response to Tim's comment.

Tim's eyebrow raises slowly, silently asking 'Oh, really? Do tell.'

Damian chuckles and looks at Jason. "What did you walk in on?"

"You don't want to know, little brother."

"It can't be as bad as headless Tim."

"What about a naked headless Tim?"

Tim sighs. He pulls out a cell phone, and hits a speed-dial number. "Yes, hello? Come here, I've got a surprise."

The squeal at the word surprise can be heard 5 feet away.

Damian and Jason turn to look at the doorway just in time to see Dick come into the room.

Dick skids to a stop just outside, and looks in. The face he makes upon seeing Jason can only be described as 'My heart is full of rainbows'

"Dickie bird don't explode."Jay jokes, smiling.

Dick tackles him, babbling at a mile a minute in Romani. Tim claps his hands, before grabbing Damian's wrist and dragging him across the hallway.

Damian can't tear his eyes from the pair, and a warm smile comes to his face. "He's so happy. My mom did this?"

Tim hums. "From what Jason said, I'd assume so. Wait 'til Bruce hears, he might even cry"

"My room is bugged, I think he is either unconscious or checking with Mama."

"Bruce doesn't watch or listen to the footage every waking moment of the day. Usually he only looks at it after we've all gone to bed. Last I heard he was swamped in paperwork for Wayne Enterprises. I might help later if he gets the balls to ask"

Damian nods. "So, will we have some alone time?"

Tim hums again, smirking a little. "That's what I was hoping for when I walked in originally afterall."

Damian wrapped his arms around Tim's shoulders and he pressed their lips together. "Let's make each other happy."

Tim opens the door to his room, letting it close shut behind them. "Let's."

Damian initiates the kiss again, pulling them together and leaning heavily on the other.

Tim leans back against the door, kissing back leisurely.

Damian pulls back to breathe, leaning his forehead against Tim's and humming. "Tim?"

"Mmm?" One of Tim's hands is playing with Damian's hair. It's about that point he remembers his old unwieldy crush on Jason and how it was all because of his stupid annoying eyes, and his entire decision to talk with Damian had resulted because his eyes were just as annoyingly attractive. He had to pause to collect himself.

"Are the next three years just going to be us lusting after each other with everyone else getting laid?"

"...possibly. Unless something truly bizarre happens." Tim snorts. "I could be kidnapped, for all we know"

"Or someone could put the idea in my head that I need to admit my love to you, but I could be in a fit of teenage rebellion and do something stupid." he shrugs. "I could enjoy Dick's hugs. Crazy things, I tell you."

Tim nods, grinning a little. "But afterwards the wait's gonna be so, so worth it"

"Have you thought about how it might happen? How we might do it?"

Tim hums. "I've been thinking about it, planning and discarding different scenarios and options for it, by the time it finally happens it'll be perfect." His mouth is pressed to Damian's jaw, and his fingers play with Damian's hair. "Again, unless something bizarre happens"

"Do you think we'll last the three years?" His voice is small, and he leans his head against Tim's neck as he asks.

"We can try. That's all we can be expected of, isn't it? Trying?" He's not really doing anything, just pressing a kiss or twelve to Damian's throat and... it's quiet moments like this he enjoys and saves for later. To remind him the wait's worth it.

Damian hums, and he pulls back. "Can we go sit on the bed and talk? Return to the three-years-later chat?"

Tim nods, standing up and walking over to his bed, flopping onto it and waiting for Damian to join him.

Damian doesn't flop onto the bed, he crawls onto it and straddles Tim.

Tim grins at him over his shoulder.

"Do you think I'll grow any taller?" Damian asks. 

"You're related to Bruce Wayne, aka 'Big McTallHuge'. Of coure you'll get taller. Unless your mother is impossibly tiny?"

"She's average height." he hums. "Will my height affect things later on?"

Tim shrugs. "I like not being the shortest in the family, but I also like tall men"

"Do you like tall men under you, or on you?"

"Either or"

"....Both is also nice"

Any witty retort Damian had prepared is lost at the second comment, and he finds himself both blushing and laughing. "Agreed."

Tim laughs, eyes closing. "You wanna know my favorite thing 'bout you?"

"I want to know everything you think about me."

"Your eyes are really pretty and impossibly expressive and I could stare into them forever"

"I thought all Wayne boys had a thing for blue eyes?"

Tim snorts. "*Bruce* has a weird thing for blue eyes. Dick likes gingers, Jason's unclear in his preferences, Cass loves cuddling, and I like green eyes"

"May my preference be you?"

Tim pauses. "...Yes...?" He's genuinely unsure. While people being interested in only one or two peope is not uncommon, the idea that it's *Tim* is... a little absurd. Just a little.

"I've never met someone as interesting as you, someone who I wanted to be around without wanting to be. I've only experienced idolatry, and this isn't that. You are more than that, and I don't want to let that go and I don't want to wait and I want all of you and to share all of me and I wish I could word it better in English."

Tim blinks, eyes widening a little. He smiles softly, "While you are not the first person I have been interested in, you are the first I've ever acted on- ever *wanted* to act on- and I understand. But won't it make the wait all that much sweeter?" He reaches back, trying to find Damian's hand. "I'd love to go farther with you, too, but I also have very healthy self preservation instincts"

Damian squeezes Tim's hand back, nodding. "I understand. And I know that aged wine is always superior too, but I also know something always happens."

"Let's hope it's a small something."


	5. Chapter 5

Two years later. 

Things had been good between everyone for a long time. Jason was alive, Dick was in denial, Damian and Tim were together. Everyone had what they needed to make them happy. But, of course, that never lasted. 

Selina always poked her whiskers in where they didn't belong. She wanted to talk about Damian's relationship, blaming love for everything he failed to do and everything he did. By the time she finishes talking to him, he can't handle the thoughts of love and everything that entails. 

So he does the cowardly thing. Damian runs. 

A bag of clothes and two thick wads of cash, everything he needs to hide from love and his father. 

Meanwhile, Ra's Al Ghul entered the Wayne manor with intent of speaking to his grandson, Jason, and leaving with either of them.

Tim was not sure what had happened, with Damian, but hoped it would blow over. If his old habit of failing to fall asleep until he ran out of power completely resurfaced, no one needed to know. So as he's wandering the halls of the manor looking for Jason so he has *someone* to talk to, he runs into an old man who has Damian's eyes but they're different and completely unappealing and Tim would say so, but at the same time this is probably a guest and that would be rude. Ruder.

When Damian slipped out of his boyfriend's- *he's not his fucking boyfriend*- window, no one stopped him. No one questioned him, no one told him to shut up and take off his shoes and go inside. His heart was in his throat, but he needed this more than anyone could understand. 

Ra's had seen a lot of people in his time, but when his eyes caught Bruce's second youngest son, it was the first time he truly felt something at first glance. He *wanted* that boy, wanted his tired blue eyes and his small frame. Everything was perfect about him, and that was *exactly* what Ra's needed in his life. 

He needed that boy.

Tim gets this sudden feeling of... well, he can't figure out a name for it but he's uneasy and he feels really uncomfortable. And the old guy with Damian's eyes(not Damian's they're the wrong shade they're the wrong shape they're *wrong*) is looking at him weird and... 

Tm suddenly remembers joking about getting kidnapped. He regrets ever thinking the words, let alone saying them. He turns around and goes to his room and leaves a note, for Jason or Bruce or *anyone*:

'The creepy old guy is looking at me weirdly I don't know his name but I'll assume one of you stooges do. If I go missing check him first.'

"Which of your sons was that, Bruce?" Ra's asks, eyes still on the form retreating quickly from the room.

"That was Tim... He's usually more talkative than that. Now, where were we...?"

Ra's blinks and smiles at Bruce. "I think we are done, actually."

Bruce raises an eyebrow, but allows it. "Alright... see you next time, Ra's"

Ra's claps a hand on hi business partner's shoulder, nodding. "Good day, Bruce. Good day."

Bruce nods, and pat's his partner's hand lightly. "You too, Ra's. You too."

Ra's nods and leaves the manor, getting into his car. As soon as he is within the confines of his vehicle, he begins to send messages to Tallia to organize a... Pickup.

Bruce watches Ra's go, not sure if he should be worried about Tim or not. Decides not to, since Tim has Damian to protect him if Ra's tries anything.

Damian hadn't had to go far to leave the property, and he had a car waiting for him anyways. Inside, Cass tosses him something and starts to drive. "Are you sure they won't notice I'm gone yet?"

Cass shrugs. 

Meanwhile, Tim is freaking out. He doesn't remember shutting down but he's powering up now and tHIS IS NOT THE MANOR WHAT THE HELL

"I just want to go on record and say I only participated in this scheme because my father doesn't value me enough not to kill me if I disobey him. Now that that's out of the way, I'm sorry for having you kidnapped so my father can be creepy and like you."

"Oh my god." Tim's higher functioning doesn't seem to be working and he's actually genuinely terrified. "What the hell. I. Who?"

"I'm Talia Al Ghul, Damian's mother and Ra's Al Ghul's daughter. I am not pleased with his desicion to kidnap you. Do you feel alright? Other than the obvious."

"Ra's... That's the creepy old guy who was at Bruce's mansion, isn't it?" Tim is aware calling your captor 'creepy old guy' is not a good idea. He's also hoping if he refuses to cooperate he might be let go. 

"Yes, that was him." Talia ran a hand through his hair. "I'm so sorry for this."

"I should've expected this. Wonderful." Tim shifts, and reaches u to scratch the back of his neck. There's a collar around his neck *what the hell*. The expression on his face must be comical.

"He noticed the seam and didnt want anything bad happening."

"Wh- Why the hell would he think a *collar* would be a solution to-???!" Tim is freaking out again. He's aware, and it's probably trivial but he *likes* being able to take his head off and he can't get the collar off and his life was difficult enough *before*. When is Bruce gonna come in on his high horse? Shining knight in armor and all that rubbish????

"I don't know why he thought that was a good idea." She admitted.

Tim lets out a noise he hasn't made since he was a whiny prepubescent brat going through his difficult phase and flops onto his back. He's so done. SO DONE.

"Listen, I'll try to get ahold of Damian and get him to come. Lately he... Hasn't spoken to me. Hasn't called. I'm worried."

Tim groans. "I think Selina said something to him. He hasn't spoken with me in a while either"

"He had better get over it soon."

Tim grunts in agreement. "...Do you think Jason or the others will realize I'm gone?"

"Do you leave your room often enough?"

"...I can spend days to weeks in there at a time"

"Then they'll notice in a month."

Tim sighs. Hopefully. He didn't remember closing his door all the way, maybe Dick would burst in for cuddles early.

"I'll pretend you haven't woken up for a week or so."

"...Thanks"

Talia ran her fingers through his hair. "I can't protect you all the time. You have to say no to him. Never let him take over."

"That I can do. I'm good at that"

"Thank you."

Tim nods, and powers down. It's obvious he's gonna need all the rest he can get.

Talia smiles down at him, and wipes the tears from her eyes before they fall. Then she tries to call her son again.

Around a month or so later, Dick is bored and decides to see if Tim is actually 'eloping' with Damian or if he's just locked himself in his room. The door is slightly ajar, so he just pushes it open, to find.... an immaculately cleaned room. Except the covers are hastily thrown over the bed so Dick investigates and finds a crumpled piece of paper. Reading the note makes him pause.

"B! Who is the creepy old guy??" He pokes his head into Bruce's study, more than just a little confused.

"Creepy guy? What are you talking about? The only old person here is me, Alfred is just as young as the day I met him." Bruce looks up over his glasses at his son, away from the contract he was supposed to be signing.

Dick holds up a note. He mimic's Tim's voice as he reads: "'The creepy old guy is looking at me weirdly I don't know his name but I'll assume one of you stooges do. If I go missing check him first.'"

Bruce thinks for a moment, then groans and rests his head in his hands. "Give me that, I'll make a few calls."

Dick holds it above his head. "Uh-uh. Not 'til you tell me who he's talking about!"

".....ewwwwww" Dick wrinkles his nose, dropping the note on Bruce's desk. "Ew ew ew ew! Brain bleach, brain bleach! Jason do you know where they put the brain bleach???"

"Up your ass, Grayson." Jason yelled back from his room.

"Dick, please, calm down. "

"When has freaking out ever achieved anything in life, Dick?" Bruce asks, setting the papers down. "When has passion truly solved anything? Don't answer that. If he refuses to return my son, your brother, to us, then I will take action. If he does not return Tim and court him the old fashioned way, then he will pay."

"On that note, where the hell is *Damian*???"

Dick waves his hands a little. "We thought they were eloping but if *Tim* was *Kidnapped* then where the hell is *Damian*???????"

Bruce doesn't move because two of his sons are missing. How did he not notice? "Dick? Am I clueless?"

"YES!!!" Dick is hyperventilating. Someone shoud give him a paper bag.

"Dick, breathe, calm down. We will find them and figure everything out- Don't we know a therapist? We can go to counseling. All together."

Dick wheezes. Alfred, appearing from somewhere, hands him a paper bag to help regulate his breathing. 

"Master Bruce. Perhaps you should call the Al Ghul estate first?"

He nods, and grabs his phone and dials it. "What do I say when they pick up?"

Alfred raises an eyebrow. "They kidnapped your son, sir. Tell them why you're calling."

Bruce nods, and takes a deep breath. "Hello? This is Bruce Wayne, and I need to talk to Ra's. What? What do you mean he's busy? Preparing for a..." His face morphed into one of disbelief. "Wedding? No, stop repeating it, I heard you the first time."

Dick makes a distressed noise through the paper bag. Alfred facepalms.

"I'm going to need you to call off the wedding. What authority do I have? I'm his father, shouldn't someone have asked me at some point? What? What do you mean, I agreed to this? What? I never- Ra's that dirty fucking bastard. Wait no don't hang up on me-" He growls and throws the phone at the desk. "Fucking Ra's"

Dick is trying to hyperventilate with the paperbag and is mostly succeeding. Alfred sighs.

"Perhaps we should send someone to intervene?" He glances out the hall. "Perhaps Master Jason, since it seems Master Richard is not up to the task."

"No, Alfred, I think this is something I need to do. Thank you."

"Forgive me, Master Bruce, but you are not as young as you used to be. And Master Timothy is being held against his will in another country. In  the home of The League of Assassins. Send someone with proper training."

"Then let the boys come with me!" He says, voice dark with exasperation. "Sorry, I just. He's my son. Dick, go get Jason. We'll be leaving withing the hour. Alfred, call my pilot and have someone prepare the jet."

Dick nods, still trying to control his breathing He bangs on Jason's door and leans against the wall while waiting for him to open it. Alfred calls Bruce's pilot, getting a few lesser servants to prepare the private Jet. He also postpones all of Bruce's appointments until further notice.

Bruce changed outfits to a pair of slacks and blue button up, rather than his sweatpants and robe. He grabs his gloves at the last moment, the thick leather ones with rounds of metal on the knuckles. He may need them to get his son back.

Dick has sort of calmed down, and bangs on Jason's door again.

Dick has sort of calmed down, and bangs on Jason's door again.

"What, Dick?" Jason groans, opening his door a crack.

"TimsbeenkidnappedandDamiansmissingandTimmightbegettingmarriedandBrucesaidtogetonthejet"

Jason throws his book to the ground, grabs his leather jacket and a baseball bat, and nods. "Lets go."

Dick nods, following Jason down the hall.

"Bruce when are we leaving." Jason asks when they get to his room. He glances at them as he grabs his ID, and tosses theirs to them. "As soon as the plane is ready."

Alfred appears. "The pilot will be ready momentarily, Master Bruce"

"Then we will be leaving momentarily." He nods at Alfred and begins walking, motioning for Jason and Dick to follow him.

Dick follows, paper bag clutched to his chest. He gets motion sick and he's not sure he'll keep from freaking out on the way over.

The ride is mostly silent, because Bruce is brooding over how his son had been kidnapped without him knowing.

-

Tim was tired. Tired of this bullshit, tired of this life, and physically tired. This was Ra's' third attempt at marriage, and each and every time so far he'd said no and kicked Ra's in the family jewels before running.  
Ra's couldn't take a hint.

As Ra's prepared for the wedding, he smiled at the assassin/tailer working on his coat. "Do you think he will say yes this time?"

"His track record says no, sir. But he might" The tailor adjusts a bit of fabric, as he talks.

"I hope he does. There has been talk amount your peers," he starts, frowning as he adjusts his bow tie. "Of my fiancé and I."

"That's unfortunate, sir. I also heard a Bruce Wayne called earlier"

Damian walked into his grandfather's ballroom then, holding a cup of Starbucks and a cup of tea for his grandfather. "Sorry for running out last month, I know we were supposed to spend time. What's with the outfit?" he glances up and down Ra's torso.

Ra's hums. "You're late for my wedding, boy"

Tim snorts. "I haven't said yes to courtship go away"

Damian freezes and looks at Tim. "Wajt- you cannot be serious. Grandfather?" he looks to Ra's, who smiles. "There is no jest."

Tim sighs long suffering. "This is our third attempt at a wedding. I still say no."

Damian's brow furrows. "Grandfather, I need you to stop this foolishness. Tim is not yours, you cannot force him into something. He will say no until your pit fails to work, and once more even then for good measure. Unless he loves you, you are wasting your time."

Ra's laughed. "And if you speak so highly of him, yet come so late, you are as well. If you loved him, you would have stopped me at the door."

"This isn't about myself! This is about him, and how you cannot keep him here and force yourself on him. What, must I duel for him to satiate you? Must everything be between you and someone else, must there always be some prize?" Damian's hand fell to the handle of his blade, Which he had on his hip to please the assassins he would one day lead (probably).

Tim snorts. "Yes. Fight for my hand in marriage. That'll surely make me say yes." He rolls his eyes. "That was sarcasm, by the way."

"Violence and manipulation are the only languages my grandfather knows, I learned this through my time with you, and with Father. If not for you, I may have ended up just like him." his mother gives an exaggerated cough, and Damian blanches. "And my mother, she was a huge part in it all."

Tim snorts. "Somehow your mother is the sanest person in your family. I wonder what that says about Bruce"

"That he needs some kind of moral supplement to take each morning along with his non sexual need for underage males with black hair and blue eyes. Maybe they would cancel each other out, though." He smiles at Tim.

Tim raises an eyebrow. "Who said his need was non-sexual?"

Damian made an uncomfortable noise and but his lip. "Seriously?"

Tim grins. He turns to the priest/assassin. "You already know my answer, can I leave?"

The priest/assassin shakes his head after a pointed glare from Ra's. 

"Then let us duel if you will not let him leave." Damian says. Ra's holds his hand out for his sword, and it is presented immediately.

Tim sighs. "You better not lose, Snow White"

"And you had better still love me when I do, Prince Florian." he smiled.

Tim snorts. "Like I could ever do that, Princess. You should parry that"

Damian's eyes widen as he looks and ducks, blocking his grandfather's blade with his own before pushing it forwards and backing up, one foot off the altar and the other on. He aims a strike in, but is blocked himself. "Thank you, Tim."

Tim hums. All he's learned about sword fighting is from watching Dick play Video games and ten or so years of fencing. 

Ra's blocks, and then again when Damian aims an ambitious strike at his head. They are evenly matched, for Damian was always apt in swordplay, and Ra's has had years of practice to be one of the best in the league. However, it was not his best skill, as he had so many skills mastered and some better than this, but his age had given him some advantage over his seventeen year old passion filled love struck grandson. 

Some advantage.

Tim watched quietly. He noticed Talia walking over at that point.

Talia handed him a sword and ripped his bonds, then removed his collar. "Fight for your own damn hand, Tim, I need to end this and talk to my son." She smiles at him and pats his head. "Take action." She then walked between her father and son, grabbing the latter by the wrist and leading him away. He tried to protest, but was immediately silenced by a hard glare.

Tim stared at her open mouthed. Then he sighed and took a stance, one of the more active stances in fencing. He has no idea how he's going to win but he's not above grabbing an assassin and throwing them at Ra's if he has to.

Ra's laughs. "You leave me to fight a boy whom I love? What, you think it will make me soft?" he laughs. Talia turns and gives him a hard look. "The boy you are infatuated with, you mean. You love him no more than Bruce will ever love me."

Tim coughs. He grabs the priest by the front of his robes, and throws the poor man at Ra's. "Don't ignore me"

Ra's dodges the man, eyes narrowing. "I do not wish to fight you, boy."

"Good. Makes my job easier" Tim turns, grabbing the book and chucking it at Ra's. He won't use the sword until he has nothing left to throw.

Ra's lifts his sword and slices the book in half, feet carrying him forwards. "Are you not grateful for the time I have spent? What can my grandson offer you that is better than the devotion I have to offer?"

"...I don't want your money. You're creepy and I live off a multi-millionaire anyway. He *listens* when I say no and he's actually aesthetically pleasing." As Tim talks, he kicks the podium at Ra's and vaults over it and over Ra's, rolling when he hits the ground and grabbing an assassin to chuck at Ra's again. They won't attack him since they were ordered not to.

Ra's listens, expression becoming more and more displeased. "And what if he doesn't care for you at all? He's young, nothing permanent will come from his passing fancy. I am stable in my affections, and whatever he does for you in bed I can do better. I have years of experience, he has impulse and passion." Ra's spat out the last sentence with a venom.

"I'm a robot. I will live longer than anything else on the planet save my brothers. I *want* a passing fancy" Tim snorts. "And experience isn't all that great if you look horrible"

Ra's made a noise of disgust and raised his sword. "You insolent," he narrowed his eyes. "I cannot believe I fell for a rude brat like yourself. Anyone else would be begging for your position, Timothy."

"Then let them take it. I don't want it" Tim bolted to the left, grabbing a vase and chucking it at Ra's. He wasn't going to stay still and let Ra's get at him and he *SO* was not going to try and best Ra's at something he had no training at.

Ra's was about to jump forwards and give chase, but a fist in his jaw and an impact on his lower back brought him to his knees. His vision swam as he turned, but it looked like two pale, dark haired men were standing, one leaning on something like a cane.


	6. Chapter 6

"Hi Bruce! Jay! Thanks for coming! You're late."

"We got here as fast as we could, Timbo. Did this creep touch you? I appreciate what Talia did and all but I'm not against going game of thrones on his ass. He touches you, he loses his hands." Jason grinned.

Tim smiles. "He wanted to wait 'til after the wedding. The first two attempts ended with a kick to the balls for him, and if it weren't for the collar Talia took off of me earlier I'd be long gone. Thanks anyway though"

"...Though if you do it anyway can I watch?" He added on hopefully.

"Nah, I'll wait until he's caused a more serious grievance. One last chance and all."

"Why? He's the head of a league of Assassins and he kidnapped me and tried to marry me against my will that's plenty of strikes"

"Talia saved my life and there are a good thousand assassins here. If an outsider tried to kill their leader, they'd step in. I love you, but I don't have no death wish."

"Talia or Damian can take over after you cut his hands off or I can do it. I was fighting him for my hand in marriage anyway I think I was expected to at least cut him once"

"Leave it, Tim." Bruce said, running a hand through his hair. "He's had enough humiliation, he's old and decrepit. His fortune is not thriving anymore, and his people are simply waiting for him to die. Leave the task to someone else."

Tim pouts, and drops the sword, pulling at the cape still draped over his shoulders. "Fine. Please tell me you brought me clothes to wear because all I have is a robe and *this* monstrosity"

"We weren't really thinking about fashion when we rushed over here, Timbo. I literally grabbed my jacket and bat, then I was out. Also, have you seen Damian? He's missing. We thought you two eloped."

"He got here late with Starbucks. Earlier than you bozos though. He was fighting for my hand but Talia dragged him off I don't know where she took him" Tim grumbles, tuggin at the cape and the tunic now. He's take off one of the belts but then he'd just be in a dress and *no*.

"Hey, we got here as fast as we could. Wouldn't have been here at all if Dick hadn't checked your room."

Tim sighs, putting his face in his hands. "I didn't even close the door why aren't you more curious"

"We thought you eloped, B said he doesn't have tapes in your room."

"...I destroyed them. But still"

"You have every right to be mad at us. What I want to know is why the hell Damian left, you know?"

Tim shrugs. "We didn't really get a chance to talk, fighting for my hand, remember?"

Jason nodded. "I know, I just want to know where he went, why I got a series of pictures from Cass of a boy with black hair getting tattoos with the caption "little bat's tatt", If that one picture is really of him and if he really got a piercing there," he shrugged. "Cass sent a lot of pictures."

"He is indeed taller and I did see a lot of tattoos and piercings. I still don't know where Talia took him"

Jason's eyes widened. "Shit, he's got guts. If you and him didn't have a thing I might be after that, if only to know what it would feel like." he whistled.

Tim shrugs a little. "I'm up for a threesome if he's willing"

Dick wheezes in the background.

Jason put a hand on Tim's shoulder and started to lead him away from the alter. "Come with me and I'll get ya some clothing to change into."

Tim lets him lead, smiling a little. Dick sort of leans on Bruce and tries not to pass out from lack of oxygen.

When Jason gets Tim to the room, he hands him a neat pile of clothes with a smile. "This is the assassin's room where they put clothing on and shit. Or get it. I don't remember the details. They don't do buttons either, kiddo."

"Awesome." Tim shoos him out of the room, changing into an assassin's uniform happily. The clothing is form fitting and black but it's not bright blue and there is no cape and there are no stupid puffy sleeves and he is so fucking happy he just sort of hugs Jason afterwards. doesn't say anything, just hugs him.

Jason hugs Tim back, until he sees Damian coming down the hallway with a tired smile on his face. "Kiddo, you should punch him. Give him a big fucking black eye or some shit."

"No. I'd rather kiss him then kick him in the balls."

"Come on, the bruise would match his stupid purple sweater, and would make his piercings look even cooler. Do it for the vine, Timmy. Punch your boyfriend. If not the eye, then split his lip? You could do that one in a kiss too. Come on, rough 'em up."

"...You better have your phone ready, then. Fine." Tim stands up, turning and walking up to Damian with a bounce in his step.

Jason scrambles for his phone, and has it filming within an impressive three seconds. "Ready, Tim?"

Tim nods a little, before grabbing Damian and kissing him. Hard. Then moving back and punching him in the nose hard enough the crack reverberated down the hall.

Damian swore and bit his lip, tilting his head back and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I deserve that. I deserve that. *shit*" he groaned out the last word, but the sentiment was there.

Tim sets his nose for him, and wraps an arm around his torso. "Jason wanted a vine. I *was* gonna kick you in the balls but he insisted I punch you" He leaned up to press his mouth against Damian's neck. "I missed you."

Damian wrapped his arms around Tim and leaned on him. "I am too high."

"You're too tall. Unless your mother drugged you?"

"Why would she drug me? I am high up, and I do not wish to be. And," and nuzzles Tim's hair. "I missed you too."

Tim hums. "You misspoke. You're not high up; you're tall. Also Jason apparently got pictures from Cass and he'd like to try something with you"

Damian's eyebrows furrowed in confusion, then rose high in remembrance and understanding. "What does he want to try?"

"He mentioned that 'if you and him,' that being us, 'didn't have a thing he'd be after that' being you. or your dick. one of the two" Tim hums contentedly. "I wouldn't mind a threesome in the future but right now your ass is mine"

"Actually," Jason spoke up. "I don't want his ass. Just the front bit. With the piercing."

Damian bit his lip. "Was it a good choice?"

"Hell yes."

Tim hums. "I'm sure. But I've been waiting for nearly three years now you can stand to wait a bit longer"

"I've been waiting atleast twelve years for someone attractive to have piercings and know me. I can wait a month or a week. Or whatever." Jason shrugged. "Just don't forget me when you see the piercing, and don't forget to give me a get out of jail free card for that piercing. Atleast one."

Tim hums again. "You know Dick has an insane pain tolerance and if you let your hair go red he'd get anything you asked him, right?"

Jason thought for a minute, then grinned. "I have been considering going soulless. What shade would look good?"

"You could pull off blood red or you could go carrot orange. You have an annoyingly attractive face that bright colors look good against"

Jason nods as he thinks about what his brother has said, and grins. "Thanks, Timbo, can't wait to see what Dickie bird has to say on it."


	7. Chapter 7

They were on their way back to Gotham, on the private jet, and Tim was *so* ready to disappear for a month. preferably with Damian. Jason had dragged Dick off for something that Tim couldn't care less about, and Bruce was in the front snapchatting with Mama S.

Damian was curled up next to Tim, a blanket tugged halfway over them. They hadn't done anything, and he kinda wanted to, but for now just being with Tim felt right. He had missed him while he was away, but the routine had just become too much for him before. Everything had been done, everything in the manor was old news and too small, surrounding him all the time. Life had become claustrophobic, and seeing the same people everyday didn't make him sleep easier. Too often, he'd had to go outside just to breathe. 

Selina had been the last straw. 

But now he can breathe, now he isn't confused, he has her bug out of his system and his head clear. Damian is talking to Tim about a movie Cass showed him while one tattoo (the one on his lower back, of his cat, pumpkin spice) healed. It had been so much fun, just sitting with her and watching the rapunzel movie- Braided? Cut? Tangle? He wasn't sure of the name- while waiting for his eyes to stop watering. It didn't ease his pain, but it made his heart lighter every time the princess danced, sang, and cheered her companions up. And, of course, he was telling Tim all about this and playing with his hand. Of course.

Tim sighed. He loved Disney movies, he did. But living with Dick had made him very familiar with them and when Tangled came out, that was the only movie Damian could be talking about, Dick had sang praises for it for weeks.

"Have you seen it, Tim? Do you think I could pull off being Rapunzel? I know I am Snow White but I think I could make a fine Rapunzel too. Maybe you could even be her- was he her husband or fiancé? I cannot remember." Damian glanced up at Tim's face, and frowned. "Do I bore you with talk of Rapunzel?"

"Flynn Ryder, or Eugene Fitz... something, would be more Jason's personality. Dick made a wonderful Rapunzel, the year it came out. I'm not bored, it's simply that Dick spent a year... saying much the same things"

Damian's face fell, and he went back to messing with Tim's hand. "Oh," he leans his head back up against the seat and takes a breath. "I can talk about something different in a minute, but, there is something going unsaid. The air is heavy, and I do not wish for it to be. Tim?"

Tim raises an eyebrow, free hand coming up to cradle Damian's cheek. "What is it?"

"I was not there for you. My grandfather kidnapped you, and I was not there. I left. I, I do not want you to think it was any thing you had done. It was not you, I needed time. I fear that I may need time in the future, that this will happen again. I hope it will not, but hopes are not stable. I feel as if I have failed you, and I know this is my fault." he closes his eyes, taking a deep breath.

"Something made you need to get away. I'd noticed how... uncomfortable you'd been. I wasn't exactly the best... either. I do not talk to people, when things bother me, I take after Bruce, in that. I bottle it up until it explodes from one tiny little thing. Or, in this case, one rather large, annoying, can't-take-a-hint thing"

"I understand. And I did not know my discomfort was... Tangible. It was words from Selina that made the tension unbearable. I wish she had not spoken to me that day, but I do know that my time away gave me a chance. I was not confident in myself, in my feelings for you, but I know now that they are true. I must thank her for that, atleast." Damian pulled Tim's hand to his chest and opened his eyes, finding Tim's own. "I will not leave you like that again."

Tim smiles a little. "Please don't. I haven't slept save for being forcibly shut down since and it has not been pleasant"

"Do you need to sleep? We can, the ride is long."

Tim sighs. "I don't know how, it's... it's been too long"

"Well, what tires you out? What will make you feel safe again? Is there any thing I can do?"

Tim sighs. "I'm tired already. I've been tired for over a month now. ...This is the safest I've felt since that day, though..." Tim closes his eyes, breathing through his nose. "But I just can't... I *can't*..." He motions with his hands, the words just won't come.

Damian shook his head. "I, I do not follow. Has this ever happened before? Would Father know how to help?"

"I told you I'd be an insomniac if I were human. It's... normal, sort of. Sleep is not... easy to come by. I used to go for months without sleep, go until I was bleary-eyed and I shook like a leaf in the wind, and then a bit more until my battery gave out and I'd pass out from exhaustion."

"I cannot imagine doing that, it sounds awful." Damian leaned up and pressed a light kiss to Tim's lips. "Maybe I can try to tire you out in a safe way? Time is not on our side, for I will not sleep until you do, and I am very tired."

Tim raises an eyebrow. "Are you suggesting we do the dirty with Bruce in earshot? Because if we are I want a chance to set up recording equipment to catch his reaction"

Pressing his face into Tim's arm to avoid laughing too loud, he nodded. "If you think it would work, then let us go ahead."

Tim snorts. "I don't think it would. We can try it later, Dick's had enough panic attacks today." Tim thinks a moment. "I slept best with you with me, though. Holding you or being held" 

Damian nodded. "I missed sleeping with you while I was with Cass. Her couch was not as comfortable as you, and her food was..." he grimaced. "I know I was not there for the couch or food, and I am grateful to her, but I have not slept well since we last did."

Tim plays with his hair, humming softly. "No one can make food as delicious as Alfred's. There's no chance, he's a god"

"Yes, alfred does seem to be a god. I am excited to eat at home again..."

Tim grins. "I'm sure he'll appreciate you saying so, the more to eat his food the better"

"I imagine so. Should I call ahead and ask him to prepare something?"

"If you wish" Tim continues to play with his hair, humming softly.

"Well, what would you suggest me asking for? I cannot remember what my favorite meal is that he prepares."

Tim shrugs. "Everything he makes tastes good, if what Bruce has said is anything to go by. Perhaps ask him to surprise you?"

Damian nods. "I guess that will-" he has to stop speaking to yawn, and starts to continue but ends up yawning again. "Actually, I think I will let it be a true surprise. Sleep?"

Tim nods a little. "I will try"

Damian wrapped an arm around Tim and sleepily smiled up at him before settling in and closing his eyes. The plane is a bit cold, but that's okay, because Tim is warm and Tim is *there* and Damian just can't imagine a better place to be (yes he can, he misses the pink room) right now.

Tim's eyes flutter closed and he sighs, relaxing against Damian. He misses his room and his bed and his *stuff* but he has Damian and that is all that matters for now. And also he's not waiting another year like no. When they get home they're not leaving his(or Damian's, no wait pink offends him nevermind) room for a month.

If Damian had been less tired, he would have daydreamed about getting home, and Tim, and the pink room that's his (and his only, cass doesn't want to acknowledge it's presence or past ownership), but he just drifts into sleep instead. He dreams of Tim, which is a happy second to the first option.

Tim manages to sleep, though he doesn't dream. His mind is made up, though. 

Meanwhile, Dick is thinking about his theatre and how he's been neglecting it. He should fix that. He misses the arcades, and the popcorn, and the *movies*. All Disney all year. He's gonna do a Hannah Montana marathon when he gets back to Gotham definitely. From the pilot to the movie(s). Aren't there like, three Hannah Montana movies?

"Dickie, I've been thinking." Jason starts, collapsing on the seat across from him with a whiskey. "And it looks like you have too." he grins. "Wanna think together?"

"Movie marathons. So many to play. My theatre is calling"

"Dami's almost legal. His ass is calling."

"Tim's not gonna wait. He's gonna tell Bruce to suck it and then he's gonna hide our baby brother from us for a month or two in his hovel of a room. But the marathons, Jason. The *marathons*."

"Exactly, and if Damian's up for it, Tim would be up for including other players in his gaming marathon. He liked you, once, and he invited me earlier. Yes, we will have your marathons, but as soon as his door is open, we have to move in, Dickie."

"I'll try anything once. But my first concern is movie marathons, Jason. I'm doing Hannah Montana next"

"What- Dick please, don't do that. Anything but that." Jason groaned, remembering the last time there was a Hannah Montana marathon. Atleast three fires, six thousand in property damages, and the loss of Alfred's left eyebrow ensued.

"It's my theatre you can't stop me"

"We've had to rebuild that theater every goddamn time you suggested a Hannah Montana marathon, don't do this."

"You're not my mother I do what I want"

"I'm your brother I'm supposed to keep you safe. This is not safe."

"It won't get me killed. Hasn't yet, and I want to watch all of Hannah Montana. In order."

"Then do it at home. In the panic room."

"I want to use my theatre. That's what it's for."

"Bruce signed a contract with Disney. There's a subclause. I'm not allowed to use any of the copies of movies or TV shows outside the theatre"

"Please Dick, don't do this to yourself. To us. You're tearing this family apart."

"Tim will agree with me. He banned Hannah Montana and all merchandising related to her from the manor"

"Then keep her out of our lives completely, Dick, we were doing good until now."

"I'm going to watch it one way or another, Jason. Either it's in my theatre or it's in the manor. If it's in the manor Tim will find out and he will burn the Wayne's family home to the ground. He told me himself"

"Then go to Barbara's, anything but Wayne property."

"...Babs like her... maybe... Ooh! I could wheel Babs *to the theatre*!!"

"Dick if you watch Hannah Montana on Wayne property I will burn your theaters to the ground kapesh."

Dick looked at him as if he'd promised to kill his puppy. "You. You'd burn my theatre?" There were genuine tears.

"Because I love you and I hate what she does to you, Dickie. I can't watch that happen again, I promised myself."

Dick whimpers.

"Hey, Dickie, cheer up. Frozen is out and at home, and we can watch it until my eyes hurt and your ears bleed."

Dick's eyes widen. "Tim showed me the movie last month! It's out? Do you think they'd ship it to us??"

"They already did, I got it as a birthday present for you. Sort of. It's nowhere near your birthday. But you get the point." He shrugged.

Dick squeals. He throws himself at Jason, and ends up in his lap, cuddling him.

Jason, now with a lapful of Dick, wraps his arms around his brother. "Happy?"

Dick nods, petting Jason's hair. "You're my favorite"

Jason smiles, a blush almost rising. "You've always been the favorite brother, Dickie. Damian is a close second, but only because he's new. And piercings-" he hums appreciatively. "But you're the favorite, Dickie."

"You spent years calling me the Golden boy. But you're Bruce's favorite too"

He let an eyebrow rise. "Really? I'm a following act, the bearded lady inbetween trapeze, fire, and elephants. I'm nothing special."

"He was broken for weeks. Tim went missing while you were gone and he didn't even notice. Tim's gone missing three times, and I've left twice, but he *noticed* the *day* you left. You're his favorite"

Jason couldn't keep his eyes on the blueblueblue of Dick's, so he turns his head to keep from the intense stare. "So he likes keeping his ducks in a row. I'm the only one who doesn't have guarantee of coming back, you know that. I can make it in the world. He must have just been thinking about that, must have been mourning the perfect little family he tried to set up. He messed up the moment he put a street rat in, I don't work in this nuclear family, I make it atomic. You know that, right?"

"No, Jason. I could move out, my theatre makes enough to let me live in a high-end house. I could leave, he didn't notice I left. The first time I ran, I was eight. He didn't notice, Alfred came to get me himself and Bruce didn't even know i was gone. Tim's the 'perfect heir' and hes ran twice and been kidnapped now but it took Bruce a month or more to notice *each* time. And Damian left but he didn't notice either. You are his *favorite*. He watches you because he cares."

By the time Dick finishes, Jason is crying and clutching onto him like he is the only thing keeping him up. He doesn't know what to say, doesn't know if there even is an argument against everything his brother had just told him. He, he doesn't want to believe it, can't believe it, why would it be true? *Him*, the favorite?

Dick's petting Jason's hair and cooing softly at him, smiling a little. Maybe jaybird would understand now.

"Dickie..." Jason started, but didn't know how to continue.

"Shh Jaybird I gotcha"


	8. Chapter 8

Tim was walking with Damian off the plain, gently herding him to Tim's room, when he hears Dick and Jason walking by. Jason looks a little bleary-eyed, Tim can't tell if it's tears or sleep deprivation. Dick's talking about something. 

"-nd anyway, I was thinking of starting playing Frozen in my theatre tomorrow, what d'ya think, Jaybird?"

Jason nods, and smiles a bit. Damian glances at Tim, then bites his lip and gives him his best puppy dog eyes.

Tim raises an eyebrow. "What?"

"Frozen, it is a Disney movie. A Disney *princess movie*. I, I have never seen a Disney movie in theater. Please?"

"...you can watch it on my laptop. And if you ask Dick could play every Disney movie back-to-back in his theatre for you. Later."

"Is there no way we can watch it in his theater tomorrow, then return to your room?" Damian smiles a bit, face still pleading.

Tim's other eyebrow joins the first. "...either you can see it on my laptop and we spend a month in my room or you go see Frozen with Dick and don't see me for a month."

Damian's shoulders slump but he frowns. "That's not fair, Tim. You know I will choose you."

Tim smiles a little. "Tell Dick you haven't seen a Disney movie in theatres after the month is over, he'll fix it. you probably won't *want* to see another Disney movie for a year afterwards, but he'll fix it"

Nodding, Damian squeezes Tim's hand. "I guess. I am surprised he has not attacked me for a marathon yet. But that is neither here nor there, shall we get going?" he nods to the hallway opposite them, which leads to their rooms.

Tim grins, pulling Damian towards his room. He thinks he hears Jason whistle at their backs.

From their spot next to Dick's room, Jason nods approvingly at their younger brothers. "How much do you wanna bet Damian'll be walking funny for the rest of his life? His ass is done for."

Dick raises his eyebrows. "You think Dami's gonna be taking it? Tim likes it when people are on top of him." He waggles his eyebrows a little. Bruce chokes on the tea Alfred had handed him seconds earlier.

"Oh yeah. But atleast Tim can fix himself up after a round in the hay. Dami ain't got that luxury, Dickie." He claps a hand on his brother's shoulder. "And I am so looking forwards to the eventual threesome so I can get a close up look at the piercings on little bat's love popsicle, if you're feeling me."

Dick snickered. Bruce was turning blue.

"Maybe it can be a four way, then you can get in on that and please the brother who had a crush on you forever."

Across the hall, Damian is in Tim's room, face in his hands as he listens to what his brothers are saying, loudly. "This is not happening, is it? Please close the door." he begs.

Tim smirks. He raises a hand to his mouth. "Are you trying to  say you *didn't* have a crush on Dick, Jason?" he calls, before shutting the door. Dick freezes.

Jason's eyes widened and his jaw dropped. "That little fucking," he turned and stalked off, face growing as red as he planned to dye his hair.

"Oh, now that was just mean. Were you not giving him advice on how to subtly get Dick's attention before?" Damian asked.

"He pulled the 'mention Tim's awkward teenage crush' card three times he earned it"

Dick blinks. Bruce thuds his head against the table.

"Is it like beetlejuice? Say it three times and you appear to ruin his scheme of attracting Dick?" Damian asks, one eyebrow rising.

"I didn't ruin it, I simply embarrassed him and clued Dick in on the pending attack" Tim's grin turns evil. "And made Bruce pass out from second-hand embarrassment"

"You believe Father was listening?" Damian looks taken aback.

"He was in the room with them"

Damian's face flushed with embarrassment. "Then he now knows of my piercing?"

"He probably knew the moment Cass texted the pics to Jason. All our phones are on his plan and he gets alerts when we get texts and such"

Damian buried his face in his hands again. "Noooooo" he groaned. "Please be joking, Tim"

Tim shakes his head a little. "Sorry, no. Should've warned you. Cass probably knows, but she doesn't particularly care if Bruce knows everything about our lives"

"I normally do not, but this..." he trails off, and walks over to Tim to bury his face in Tim's hair.

Tim pats his thigh. Then he leans forward to mouth at Damian's neck.

Damian stiffens, then relaxes into Tim, a cross between a groan and a whine building up in his throat.

Tim's hand finds it's way under Damian's shirt, skittering across his stomach. His other hand is holding Damian's thigh, for balance.

Damian has to wrap his arms around Tim's shoulders to keep up, and the noise slips out when the hand on his thigh tightens its grip just the slightest bit.

Tim growls, and he tugs at Damian's shirt, pulling back to glare at it.

In another situation, the look would have been terrifying and the growl even more so, but now it just makes Damian scramble to tug the shirt (band shirt for something he's never heard of, but that cass likes) *off* and drop it onto the floor.

The moment the shirt is off Tim's mouth is latched onto Damian's neck again, and his hand is tracing along Damian's side.

Part of him is disappointed that Tim does not look down to check out his new tattoos, while other parts of him feel guilty about the hands that had caressed his body when making them, and pleased that they are finally going to be together the way he'd wanted since the first time Tim had kissed his neck, or laid him down on a bed.

Another noise slips out, closer to a sigh, and he murmurs "please," in his native tongue, though he doesn't know what he is asking for.

Tim grunts, his hand squeezing Damian's thigh. "What?" His voice is a little husky and he might have spoken in French. He's not exactly paying attention right now.

Damian's back arches into Tim, and he moans. "Please," he repeats.

Tim licks his neck, trailing his hand down to cup the front of Damian's pants. "Please *what*?"

A high, keening whine slips out, and Damian's knees nearly buckle. He murmurs something incoherent in Arabic, grip tightening on Tim.

Tim grins against his neck, simply holding still in this position.

"Bed," he finally manages to say, inbetween in vague Arabic and another "please".

Tim hums, stepping back and flouncing over to the bed, swinging his hips exaggeratedly as he goes.

Damian follows, kicking off his shoes and fumbling with his belt buckle *why did he put one of those on this morning*.

Tim grins at him, pulling the ninja suit off easily.

Damian manages to get the buckle undone before he reaches the bed, and tugs the pants down too on his way. He doesn't have enough time to get them completely off however, and he reaches for Tim with his pants halfway down his thighs and falling fast.

Tim's on his knees in front of Damian before they fall, tugging Damian's boxers down with his teeth.

About then is when Damian stops breathing, and can't tear his eyes from the shock if black hair *so close to his crotch* and the flashes of blue eyes that he catches.

Tim pulls back a little, blowing his bangs out of his eyes, and then leans forward to lick along the inside of Damian's thigh.

His breath hitched, and Damian didn't know where to put his hands so he just put them behind his head. His hips practically itched to roll forwards, but he did his best to stay in place.

Tim hummed, letting his breath fan over Damian's dick. He'd mentally catalogued the new tattoos, and oh, there's the piercing. Tim grinned, taking the tip of his dick into his mouth.

When Tim's lips wrapped around the head of his dick, and his lower lip nudged the piercing, Damian immediately knew that it had been a fantastic choice and he couldn't have picked a better spot. He moaned loudly, hands sliding down to his chest, where they hovered.

Tim took as much of Damian's dick into his mouth as he could. Which was most of it. He didn't have a gag reflex. *none* of them had gag reflexes. This was one of the reasons Tim... suspected... Bruce's thing about them wasn't purely aesthetic.

And both hands moved back up to grab at his own hair while strangled moans escaped. "T-Tim" he gasped.

Tim hummed.

Damian grunts, and shuts his eyes, but opens them again when he moves a hand down to Tim's shoulder to push him away, gently. "Tim,"

Tim pulls back, and pouts up at him.

Damian grabs at Tim's arm, and pulls him up, off his knees. When he's standing, Damian kisses him. Hard.

Tim kisses back, grabbing a fistful of Damian's hair.

Damian wraps his arms around Tim's waist, pulling him even closer. He doesn't know what he wants to do, but he knows that he wants to make Tim feel *fucking great* and he wants to break the rule his father laid out two year ago- well, they'd already done that. And it is so fucking great, and he loves Tim so much. If he could bear to tear himself away from Tim, he would tell him, but his lips are quite occupied.

Tim has smashed the rule Bruce laid down with a hammer. He's perfectly okay with that. The kissing was nice but he's liked giving a blowjob. He would actually get to finish him off at some point in the future.

Damian stumbled back, turning, so that he could push Tim down onto the bed. He pressed a kiss to the other's jaw, then to the corner of his lips, then to his jaw again. "Tim," he whispered.

Tim grunted. He flipped them over, straddling Damian's hips. He was kissing at Damian's neck again, which was how he liked it.

And that was the end of Damian's trying to top. Yep, he wasn't going to win that battle, he was just going to let Tim do whatever he wanted because, because that felt *really fucking good* and he may have been moaning? A bit? And if he'd been asked he would admit to it because it was Tim's doing, he'd never be ashamed of his love.

Tim groaned. He ground his hips down into Damian's, biting at his throat.

Damian groaned at the feeling, his own hips bucking up into Tim's.

Tim growled. He sat up, and moved back, so he was now kneeling between Damian's legs. 

"If you stop me this time, I'll bite you."

The look in Damian's eyes then was a cross between true terror and lust.

Tim smirked, and then took Damian's dick into his mouth, deep-throating him.

Damian's hips bucked up into Tim's mouth, and he was had to fist his hands in the sheets to keep from, from doing *something*. He really wanted to kiss Tim.

Tim choked, at the movement. He slammed his palm into Damian's hip to keep him still.

Damian whimpered, and knew his hip was going to bruise because that *hurt* and he couldn't *move*.

Tim snarled around the dick in his mouth, glaring at Damian. '*that* hurt? you tried to kill me with your dick!'

Damian groans and stares down at him with this look like "oh my god don't stop" and also "this wouldn't have happened if we'd done it my way"

Tim snorts, and bobs his head a little. He glares a Damian through his bangs. 'if you complain or try to stop me, you will lose your dick.'

Damian breathed through his nose, trying not to move, or speak, or do anything that would result in the wordless threat.

Tim hummed, lightly running his teeth along the length.

Damian relaxed just the tiniest bit, still tightly holding the covers.

Tim gave no shits about where Damian's hands were, so long as they weren't pushing him away. And while Damian's hips bucking was usually encouraged it really was not fun have a dick thrust into the back of your throat suddenly. At all.

While Damian would have loved to push Tim off and kiss him, he also loved the way that Tim did *that* and was fond of keeping his dick. But, he couldn't cope anymore, so he gasped, back arching "fuck- tim- i think-" he whimpered.

Tim hummed, using one hand to rub the small slice of Damian's dick he couldn't quite fit into his mouth. The vibrations and extra sensation should send him over the edge.

There is no noise as he comes, and he pushes Tim away after he finishes, when he can process things again. Fuck.

Tim sits up, and wipes his mouth. "There, see? This is what we could've had like 20 minutes ago, but *you* decided to try and kiss me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if u didnt have time to read this chapter then heres how it basically goes:
> 
> "tIM I WANNA SEE FROZEN"-dami  
> "me or frozen pick. now."-tim  
> ":((("-dami  
> bruce is uncomfy  
> jay is outed as liking the biggest of d's  
> dami and tim FUCKING FINALLY GET IN BED TOGETHER  
> "im gonna fucking suck this dick and YOU are going to LIKE IT"-tim  
> "omg"-dami
> 
> tada thats basically it folks


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chapter 8 is currently a void, so take this.
> 
> chapter 8 does exist but technically we wrote this one first.  
> -beetle

Damian rolled over, pulling the covers over himself. Getting his breath back to normal was a bit of a challenge, but he was just so happy. That was Tim. *That* was the man he loved.

Tim was smirking a little. That had been... fun. If he could, he'd be purring. He snuggled up to Damian for a nap.

Damian wrapped an arm around Tim, and hummed as he pressed his face to his hair. "Thank you, Tim." he murmured.

Tim grunted. "We're not leaving this bed for a month. I promise it won't be boring"

"How could it ever be boring, when I have you?" He mumbles.

Tim snorted. "I am not the most interesting person in the world. But i can promise not to leave you alone long enough to realize that"

"Good, I do not want to be alone when I could have you. You are so interesting, you could never be anything else." Damian kissed his hair before going back to snuggles.

Tim snorted again, but let it be, nuzzling his shoulder.

As he laid there, Damian felt himself being pulled farther and farther into the dreaming world. "Tim," he mumbled.

Tim hummed, drifting to sleep. He was content to sleep now.

Tim is asleep.

Dick is still sitting with Bruce, who woke up a few minutes ago from his 'nap'.

Jason had fallen asleep in his own room, but not before leaving the house and getting what he needed to dye his hair. And dying his hair. It is now no longer black, but a purplish-red that is much redder than it really needed to be, but hopefully enough to distract Dick.

Dick hasn't moved in four hours. Bruce is a little worried, but writes it off after a few seconds of thought.

The next morning, Jason wakes up refreshed and without anyone there. It's simultaneously good and bad. He'd missed having someone next to him, but more often than not he'd be woken rudely when with someone else. So now he's just glad to see the late afternoon sun pouring through his windows.

Dick still hasn't moved.

Jason gets up and puts on a pair of sweat pants before heading downstairs. Coffee sounds good, or maybe he could have Alfred make some tea? Maybe he'd have some wine. He'd know what he was in the mood for by the time he ran into Dick.

While Dick hadn't moved from his spot at the table since Jason left, he had eventually put his face in his hands.

When Jason gets into the kitchen, he decides coffee is the safest bet. "Morning, Dickie. How's your morning been?"

Dick doesn't respond, but he thunks his forehead onto the table.

"Rough then?" He hums and adds a splash of whiskey to the coffee, as if that affected it at all. "Tell me about it."

Dick doesn't move. He's actually still trying to process a few things. He knew about Tim's crush, but, he'd never *thought* about it. And the thought of *Jason* having a crush on him was weird, like, Jay could do *way* better, and now he was thinking about these things and. How. What.

"Nothing to say then? Well, uh, I had a great night. Slept well. No bags under my eyes, that hasn't happened in a while." He turns and leans against the counter and sips at the coffee. "No jetlag, that's fun."

Dick grunts.

Jason sighs. "How long are you going to ignore me?"

"'m no' 'gnorin' you. 'm. 'think'n'"

"Then tell me what you're thinkin' about." He said, rolling his eyes.

"c'n't. no' done think'n'"

"Then look at me while you think. I'm not distracting, I'm pretty boring." He took another sip of the coffee.

Dick makes an insulted noise. He actually sits up, to say... *something*, but is cut off by Alfred, who comes in to begin preparing Bruce's breakfast. "Master Richard, are you going to retire, today? You haven't moved from that spot since yesterday" He tuts. Dick thuds his forehead back onto the table.

Jason groans into his coffee. He almost got Dick to see his hair. Oh, Alfred, how he loved and despised the man's timing.

Alfred sighs. "Master Richard, what have I said about elbows and faces on the table?" Dick doesn't respond, but Alfred doesn't seem surprised. "Master Jason- ...hm. Master Jason, you could have waited for me to come and make you coffee, now you've moved everything, how am I to know where it all is?"

"I was just so excited to wake up, Alfred." He grinned. "Do you like my hair, Alfred?"

Alfred hummed. "It's... interesting"

Dick sort of pauses. What does *that* mean?

Jason nods. "Thank you, Alfred, I will take that as a compliment."

Alfred nods, preparing fresh toast to go with the eggs and bacon he's making. Pancakes are on the griddle.

Dick sits up, turning toward Jason to investigate and. His brain, which wasn't quite functioning before, stops completely.

Jason smirks. "Like it, Dickie bird? Tim suggested it."

Dick blinks a few times. His jaw fell at some point, and his mind is still tying to process everything. Alfred taps Dick's chin lightly as he passes. "Caching flies, are you, Master Richard?"

"I'll take 'stunned' as a positive reaction, dickie." He takes another sip of the coffee, only to find it empty. He pours himself another cup, and takes a long sip of that.

Dick coughs. He blinks a few more times. "I'm hallucinating from lack of sleep. I'll go fix that now, g'night" He stands up, pushing his chair in, and heads for the stairs.

Jason cackles to himself inbetween hearty gulps of coffee, and he grins at Alfred. "Today is a good day, Alfred. today is a good day."

Alfred nods, "I'm sure, Master Jason. Please make sure Master Richard makes it to his room? He doesn't seem equipped to navigate the halls"

Jason nods and sets his coffee down. "Sure thing, Al, anything for you. You're my favorite parent, after all." He does a thums-up at the older man before walking off to follow Dick and keep him from doing something stupid, like walking off a balcony or tumbling down stiars. Or entering Tim's room with anything but a shout of "the house is fucking burning down get ut or you will die".

Dick's made it up the stairs and a few steps forward before he starts toppling over.

Jason rushes to his brother, catching him. "Whoa there Dickie, I got ya. Slow down."

Dick yawns. He blinks a few times, and glares at the walls around them. He opens his mouth to say something but passes out before he can. He sort of slumps against Jason and snores loudly.

He rolls his eyes. "That's not what I meant, but okay. Good night Dickie."


	10. Chapter 10

Dick got up bright and early the next day, and made a snap decision. Well, two. One: ignore the things that bother you, it's worked before and it won't stop working now. Two: play frozen in the theatre, and make Jason watch with you. he got you the movie he can stand to watch it a few dozen times.

Jason had gone to sleep after dinner, and was still asleep when the ungodly hours rolled around. He wasn't intending to wake up for another threee or four hours at least, and, if he were lucky, maybe even six hours more? Sleep was probably his favorite thing to do, other than reading.

Dick burst into Jason's room, grinning from ear to ear. He flicked the light switch on, and opened the curtains so sunlight filtered onto Jason's bed. "Rise and Shine, Jason! The day is dawning!"

Somehow, Jason stays fast asleep, head still buried in a mound of pillows and blanket twisted perilously around his thighs, effectively keeping him from moving his legs.

Dick grabs one of the blankets and tugs. He ends up pulling it, and Jason, off the bed altogether, but that should at least wake Jason up.

Good move, but no cigar. Jason grunts and stirs, but no farther than that.

Dick kicks him.

Jason groans, but refuses to open his eyes. "Go 'way"

"If you don't get up I'm hogtying you and you can watch the Hannah Montana marathon without me"

Jason groaned again and pulled himself up and out of the safety of the pillows. "I hate ya, dickie." He mumbles.

"That stings! And here I was, about to offer you to watch the first screening of Frozen in Gotham with me. I'm hurt"

"Ya barely fuckin look 't me yesterday, Dickie. I'm a lil hurt too." He opens his eyes to squint at his brother.

"I was having a crisis, excuuuuuuse me"

"Are ya havin' a crisis now?" he asks tiredly. Realizing he'd fallen asleep wearing a hat, though he didn't remember putting one on, he tugs the beanie off and runs a hand through the bright ass red hair.

Dick snorts. "No. Now get up, we're gonna go watch Frozen"

Jason extended a hand towards his brother. "Do ya like my hair, Dickie? Ya took off yesterday without sayin."

Dick pauses to actually look, since he hadn't really paid attention. He'd assumed he'd been hallucinating yesterday.  
".......Uh"

"Ya still ain't sayin anything, bro. Come on. Words are your friends."

Dick coughed, and mumbled something in Romani.

"You know I don't speak your gypsy language, Dickie, gimme something in English or Russian, atleast. Italian?" he raised an eyebrow.

Dick coughed again. "Y-you look b- nice."

"Thank you. Now help me up?" he waved his hand.

Dick rolled his eyes, tugging Jason to his feet.

When he was stood up straight, Jason had to hold onto Dick to keep himself from swaying. "Whoa, head rush."

Dick snorted, but he was smiling a little. "So. Movies. Now. We can skip breakfast and I can have the concessions worker make you coffee"

Jason nodded. "Good plan, good plan. What are we seein again?"

"Frozen! You'll *love* it"

"Oh really now? I will? Who says this, Dick the disney enthusiast or some critic with a tiny voice and even tinier lips?" He raises an eyebrow.

"Tim likes it."

Jason nodded. "Then I will adore it."

"Exactly!"

"So tell me, dickie bird, what is the plot of this flick?"

"Anna saves the country with the help of her sister, a hot guy, a merchant, and a snowman from villains like her sister, a hot guy, a merchant, and a snowman"

Jason nods. "Sounds fucking fantastic. Let's go see this shit, and get me some coffee."

Dick grins, and leads Jason by the wrist. He waves at Alfred and is down a in the garage when he pauses. 

"I *was* gonna take my bike, but would you rather take one of the 7 cars Bruce has given us for our birthdays?"

"No. Bike sounds good. I can nap while I sit behind you." He rubs at his eyes, yawning.

Dick raises an eyebrow. "Have you ever ridden on a motorcycle with me? I can't remember. And speed limits are for other people." Dick nods to himself wandering over to the corner of the garage where his and Tim's motorcycles are kept. Tim's was built from scratch, Dick's was heavily modified.

"Just kinda handcuff me in front a ya, I'll stay on." He rolls his eyes. Surely it can't be *that* bad.

Dick remembers the one time Tim rode with him. He hadn't meant to let Tim fall off, and it took them weeks to find all of his parts, they were scattered all over Gotham. Tim was still missing his pinkie from that incident, but he'd probably made a new one by now. Dick shrugs. "Just yell if you fall off. Someone will probably hear you"

"Nah, handcuff me. In front of you. To you. Whatever."

"And if you manage to fall off even then, just remember to yell. And try to stay in one piece" 

Dick straddles the bike, turning it on as he does.

Jason rolls his eyes and wraps his arms around his brother, straddling the bike behind him. Dick is really warm, and he's comfortable... Perfect for sleep. Yes, good.

Dick tears out of the Garage at 60 miles an hour.

Jason doesn't stay on for even a foot, and ends up on the ground, exactly where the bike had been. He shrugs and lays down, curling up on the ground. Might as well get some more sleep in before Dick notices.

Dick stops, and turns around, coming back into the garage ten minutes later. 

"Jay! Get up! Movie time!!"

Jay is already fast asleep again.

Dick rolls the bike up right next to his head and nudges him with the front tire.

Groaning, Jason rolls away from the bike. Sort of. He bumps into another object, causing a heavy bottle to fall on his hip. That wakes him up, sputtering curses and holding said hip.

Dick snickers.

Jason glares at him.

Dick smiles almost apologetically. "Hang on this time, ok?"

"Listen to the words coming from my lips, dickie bird. Either slow the fuck down, or handcuff my wrists around your bitch self."

"Speed limits are for wimps! Are you a wimp, Jason?"

"I'm no wimp, I simply have a healthy damn desire to stay in one fuckin piece. Slow your bitch ass down, or I'll redesign your bikes so they can't go faster than I can crawl."

"The other bike is Tim's and if you touch it, well."

"I'll tell him it was your fault. Your move, speedy."

"I don't have handcuffs to use, mister no-fun. But either way, you need to *hold on* to me"

"Give me two seconds, I will find handcuffs to use. Bruce has them literally everywhere." Jason reaches blindly into a toolbox, and pulls out three pairs of cuffs.

Dick blinks. "Well. C'mon, up. Sit with me on my baby, and we can go to my *other* baby"

"Got any more babies you need to mention? Like yourself, you huge five year old?" Jason said, nevertheless hopping on the back of the motorcycle and working the black pair around his left wrist. He slipped the key into Dick's front pocket, and smiled. "Now take me to see this movie."

Dick grins. "There's the dog Alfred promised me when I was nine, and Eska, my elephant"

"Where is Eska? I miss her."

"She got too big to keep in the manor, she's in the Gotham zoo. I visit her ever other week, I'll be going tomorrow. Wanna come with?"

Jason rolled his eyes. "Obviously." He finished cuffing himself to Dick, and had a half second of nervousness. "Now I will not fall off. Or we both will, whatever."

"I've never fallen off this bike. Bruce and Tim have, but I haven't"

"What, am I not good enough to be on that list? Ass."

"You never wanted to ride with me before" Dick defends. "...also it might have to do with how the time Tim did he lost half an arm and his left foot"

"Well then I have a good damn reason not to have wanted to ride with you!" He nearly yells. "Dude, i fell off the exact literal second you pressed the gas pedal."

Dick shrugs a little. "He's in one piece now. I think he had to make a new pinkie though." He glanced at Jason. "We *could* take a car, you know"

"Well, I'm already cuffed to you. No point now."

Dick snorts. "'Kay. Try not to fall off, I don't think you'd want to meet the wheels when they're moving." He revs the engine, and theyre out of the Garage at a more sedate pace. (50 mph)

Jason starts to nod, but his head gets snapped back at the sudden speed. He manages to bury his face in his brother's neck, however, and then he just tries to keep his ass on the seat.

Dick whoops. He loves going fast, it's the second best thing in the world. Best thing is the trapeze. He's still one of the best in the world, and he takes pride in that.

Jason is best at being intimidating and reading, and also sleeping. This, however, is real fear. Dick is awful. Nothing is okay and his wrists hurt. For the first time, Jason prays to whatever god he doesn't believe in to take pity on him. To bury him in one piece. To have there be nice flowers at the grave. Dick is awful.

Dick laughs into the wind, and as they make it halfway across Gotham, he never dips below 50 miles an hour. He averaged around 70.

By the time they stop moving, Jason began crying. Real tears streaming down his cheeks, staining his brother's shirt. He hates motorcycles. He hates Dick. He didn't sign up up for this.

Dick stops the motorcycle in the spot designated as his, and pulls the key from his pocket to uncuff Jason. "That was fun!"

"fuck you" jason mumbles, still pressed against Dick.

"Huh? What's wrong? You didn't fall off, and you're all in one piece. You're good. Movie time. We can have the concessions lady make you coffee. or she could run to starbucks, if you don't mind the wait"

"you drive like a fuckin idiot."

"Jason! that stings." He pouts.

"no seriously. dick. one day you're gonna get in an accident and you're not gonna come out of it. drive, drive safer. please. dick. don't leave me. don't leave the family. you idiot."

"I haven't died yet, and I've been driving this motorcycle since i was 12. I'll be fine"

"no, no you won't. someone's gonna hit you or you're gonna tumble and you'll *fucking die* and no. i'm not gonna let that happen dick."

"If you tamper with my motorcycle i'll make Bruce buy me a new one"

"dickie i am literally beggin ya not to ever fucking drive like that again. literally."

"That's the only way *to* drive"

"then drive a car? i don't know. just. please."

"I drive my cars the same way. We could've drove a car. We'll have to drive my baby back to the garage, you know" He stands up. "But! Movie time."

Jason stares at him, and gets up slowly. He puts the cuffs and the key in his back pocket, and stands. Slowly.

Dick grabs Jason's wrist and drags him into the movie theatre. "Maria! Can you please make my brother coffee? Black, no sugar, shot of whiskey if you could"

Well, atleast Dick knew what he liked. What he needed.

The concessions lady nodded, getting to work on the request. Dick told one of the workers the movie and theatre number he wanted to see.

Jason just stood there numbly, and accepted the cup of coffee when it was offered.

Dick lead him to the theatre. Once seated, the movie began with a few randomly selected previews.

After a while, the coffe was emptied, and within a minute or so the cup was refilled.

The movie began in earnest, and Dick giggled a little to himself. "It's starting! Pay attention, Jay!!" He whispered.

He did so, and was soon in a much better mood, humming along with the first song.

"Born a cold and winter air, and mountain rain combining...." Dick sang along under his breath, swaying a little. "Split the ice apart, and break the frozen heart...!"

When Jay saw the princess, he smiled. "That her? She's like you. And, ooh! That redhead is like me." when they did the ice thing, he smiled. Then anna got hit, and his mouth fell open. "Nonononono"

Dick froze, at the comparison. And he wheezed a little, when Anna got hit. Jason's breakdown was- was unrelated and he needed to stop thinking.

When the troll scene came up, Jason nodded, but when the troll told Elsa to keep her powers hidden, he wiped away tears. "Nooooo that's the worst thing you can do come on guys, that's, that's the worst thing." he mumbled.

Dick bit his lip, blinking away tears. He blindly grabbed for Jason's hand.

Jason squeezed his hand, and then he brightened immediately at the beginning of Do You Wanna Build A Snowman.

Dick actually sobbed a little, when their parents died.

Jason was in broken shock. "That was alfred and bruce. no. nooooo." he mumbled.

Dick sniffed.

Jason grinned when Anna woke up with some crazy ass hair. "Meeee."

"Your hair even matches"

Jason nodded. "Damn straight, and I paid good money for this color." 

Dick giggled, and then the first time in forever started playing, and he couldn't help but sing along

Jason wanted to sing, but didn't know the words, so he just hummed. It worked.

When Elsa came into view, Dick couldn't keep the grin off his face.

"Queeeen" Jay said.

"Not yet."

Jason's mouth went into an 'o' shape, and he turned to look at his brother. "Really?"

"It's her coronation day, Jason. they've said it like three times now"

"Rude. I thought maybe something would have happened? Like before the coronation? I don't know."

"The action starts after the party. She's made Queen, Anna's still a princess"

Jason nods. "Okay."


	11. Chapter 11

As Jason walked out of the theater, he had a grin on his face and a hand full of coffee. "Let it go, let it go, can't hold it back anymore! He yelled. Some people have him dirty looks, others gave him amused glances.

Dick grinned. "The window's open, so's that door--! I didn't know they did that anymore! Who knew we owned eight thousand salad plates...?"

"Hey, Dickie, I thought you were Elsa and that I was Anna?" he asked, eyebrow raised.

"I have Anna's cheer down, and you're kinda stuffy. Of course, Tim would make a perfect Elsa, really, doncha think?"

"What does that make Dami then?" he asked, eyebrow higher.

"....hm."

"Maybe Dami is Anna, in a more incestuous turn of events?"

"Well, Tim *is* technically Bruce's son, even if he's pretty much ignored all of Bruce's attempts at parenting..."

"True, true. So he's Elsa, and Dami is Anna. Probably."

"Who's Kristoff? Is Ra's Weaseltown?"

"One of us, and Ra's. Totally Weaseltown."

"Let's say I'm Kristoff. You can be Hans, you've got the hair for it. And the eyes"

Jason nodded. "Atleast I get to be the game of thrones character."

Dick snickers. "Who's Olaf?"

"Cass."

Dick snorts.

"When we get home, we need to get drunk. And sing the songs. Kay?"

"Tim has all the songs rigged for karaoke in the arcade, and we can send the concessions lady for alcohol"

"Naaah, don't wanna ruin anyone's day listening to us. Home."

Dick pouted. "Are you gonna insist on driving, too?"

"Yes. I am. Hold my coffee and get behind me." Jason hands said coffee to Dick, and climbs onto the motorcycle.

Dick snorts, and dumps it in the bush, handing the mug to Maria. He gets on behind Jason, and holds on. "I'm ready"

Jason took a second to appreciate his brother's thighs, so close to this own, and nods. "Good."

"Are we gonna go? c'mon, let's get home. There're songs to sing!!"

Jason started the bike, and took off. He didn't go as fast as Dick had, but he actually stops at red lights and doesn't weave through traffic.

Dick is complaining the entire time. "Can't we go faster?" "Are we there yet?" "If I was driving we'd be home already" "You're too sloooooow"

When they reached the house, Jay had passed the point of annoyance and reached calm acceptance and ignoring what his brother was saying.

"Finally. Okay, meet me in Home theatre 2, ok? I'm gonna get the karaoke stuff from TV room 4"

Jason stood up, nodding. He didn't head straight for the theater though, he went for the alcohol cabinets. Mainly the wine and vodka cabinets. Okay just the vodka cabinet, what can he say? He's a vodka kind of guy.

There was a sticky note on one of the bottles, written in Tim's handwriting. 'If anyone touches my vodka, there will be consequences' It's from before he stopped drinking/eating, and no one's willing to face his wrath. Alfred, of course, simply accepts boundaries. 

Dick has to stop in Gaming room 3 to find the karaoke machine, but the Frozen things were in TV room 4.

Jason doesn't go for his brother's vodka, even he isn't that stupid. He goes for his own, the strawberry vodka behind Bruce's gin.

By the time Jason gets there, Dick has set up the karaoke machine and is choosing one of the songs. He's leaning toward Frozen Heart, but... it might be too hard for Jason to follow along with.

When Jason comes in, he takes a hearty gulp of vodka. "Hello Kristoff!"

"Hello, Prince Hans." Dick grins a little. "So. Whatcha wanna start with?"

"Love is an open door." He nods.

"Am I Anna?" He asks, as he sets up the machine to play.

"Sure." he smiles to himself.

"Do you betray me and break my heart?" Dick asks, as the music starts up. "Okay, can I just- say something crazy?"

"I love crazy." he sets the bottle down on the table.

"All my life has been a series of doors in my face! And then suddenly, I bump into you...!"

"I was thinking the same thing, cause like, " Jason began to sing along with his brother, grabbing his hand and leading them into a twirl.

Dick giggles, letting him twirl them. 

"I've been searching my whole life to find my own place, and maybe it's the party talkin', or the chocolate fondue~" Jay continues.

"But with you~" Dick croons, grinning widely.

Jason carried his weight through the song, only messing up once or twice. At the end of the song, he grinned. "Can I say something crazy?" he pulls out the handcuffs. "Will you marry me?"

Dick chokes, and laughs. "Can I say something crazier?" He grabs Jason's hand and yanks him to his feet. "Yes!"

Jason grabs Dick around the waist and dips him low, kissing him.

Dick laughs into the kiss, threading his fingers through Jason's hair.

Jason keeps the kiss intact as he pulls his brother up, his eyes fluttering shut.

Dick lets his own eyes close, and tugs Jason a little closer. 

"*ahem*."

Jason groaned into the kiss, not wanting to break it.

Dick pulled back, to see who it was. Alfred was waiting. He stood up, stepping away from Jason a little.

Jason wipes the back of his mouth, and glances between Alfred and Dick before starting to walk out.

"Ah-ah, Master Jason. Master Bruce had requested you and Master Richards' presence for dinner"

"Please inform B I'll be somewhere near my room, probably." He smiles at Alfred before heading off.

"He wishes to talk with the two of you personally"

Jason groaned. "Really? Both of us? Not just Dickie? You sure?"

"His exact words were 'I'd like to speak with Jason and Dick', sir"

Dick sighs. "C'mon, Jaybird. Let's see what dad wants"

Jason grabs the vodka for good measure. "Fine. But after, either I'm finding a way into Tim's room or me and you are gonna have fun. Got it?"

Dick grins. "I'll hold you to that"

Jason grimaced, but it was supposed to be a smile. Really. "Mhm."

Dick giggled, and lead the way down to see Bruce. Who was sitting at the dining table, waiting, hands clasped in front of his mouth.


	12. Chapter 12

Jason took a deep, deep, deep breath before fully stepping into the room. Jason didn't trust his words at the moment, everything was too... Strange. Dick had let him kiss him. Dick had kissed back. And now? Now Bruce wanted to talk to them with the serious look on his face. 

"It has recently come to my attention that all of my sons have been romantically interested in eachother. Why did no one think to tell me?"

"Because you're our dad and you should have already known." Jason says. "Were you not aware?"

Dick snorted. "He just said *recently came to my attention* Jaybird. Of course not"

Jason rolled his eyes. "It was sort of obvious. Me and Tim wanted Dick, Tim sorta wanted me? I think? Then Tim really wanted Damian and Damian wanted Tim. So far, no one knows who Dick wants."

"Babs. I wanted Babs for *years*. And Wally, Roy... Kory..." Dick gets a faraway look in his eyes.

Jason nods, and turns to walk away. He doesn't want to hear this? He already knew that Dick wasn't interested in family but. Still.

"And of course, from the moment Jaybird entered the picture it was very hard to concentrate"

Jay glances at Dick, expression mildly alarmed. Hard to concentrate?

Bruce raises an eyebrow. Dick sighs. "Do I *have* to explain that? You have eyes!"

"Don't encourage B, he already has three sons who look nearly identical. He's shown a preference. Tell *me* what to look at, for, whatever."

"Tim agrees with me on this one, you've got these *eyes* like. How. What color are they? And you talk in a sex voice! Like all the time. It's not fair. And don't even get me started on how unfair your thighs are, like god"

Jason bit his lip and let one eyebrow rise. "You're attracted to my thighs?" he shifts how he stands. "And my voice? And my eye color?"

"And your **brain**. You hold the best conversations in this family I swear!" Dick whines a little.

"So you like the sound as well as the words?" Jason wishes he had a witty quote right now, but all that comes to mind is Shakespeare.

Dick nods a little. "And I can't compare at all, I flunked out of *highschool* and you're *perfect* how could I ever be the 'Golden boy'?" Dick throws his hands up. "I'm done. Bruce, I'm going to the zoo, have fun with dinner bye" He's out of the room before either of them can respond, and on his bike within the minute.

Jason stands there, tears coming to his eyes. "Why can't he see he's perfect, B?"

Bruce grunts.

"You're really bad at parenting, Bruce. Seriously." Jason rolls his head back for a long gulp of vodka.

Bruce snorts. "It took you this long to notice?"

"How do you have five children again? A fetish and bad decisions?" Jason snorts.

Bruce rolls his eyes. "Persistence. I learn from my mistakes, and Alfred makes sure you're all fit to join society"

"We like Alfred. He's like a mom to us, except better because he doesn't yell at us, only you? Like once." He takes another sip of the alcohol.

"Now I'm gonna ask you to do something and you're gonna say yes or pretend I never asked, please Bruce?"

Bruce inclines his head, spreading his hands in invitation.

"I, I can't taste anything. I know I'm supposed to, or something, but I can't taste anything. Do you know any way to help me?"

"I can. You'll have to go to sleep for a few hours, though. And keep me updated on whether it works"

Jason smiled in relief and nodded. "Thank you. Also, will Dickie ever be able to eat? I know it messes with him sometimes. It messes with me too, but atleast drinking is an option."

"He doesn't want me to check on him. Until he lets me, he won't be able to"

"Did something bad happen, or would it just mess with his illusion?"

"Bit of both. Your leaving made him... very jumpy"

Jason looked away. "So I accidentally fucked him up?"

Bruce sighed. "It wasn't your fault, don't blame yourself. He's.... fragile. If his worldview shifts too much his walls and mental blocks stop working and he could lapse into a catatonic state"

"I just want to help him, you know?" Jason sighed. "I mean, it's always in the back of my mind, but I don't like thinking about it. It makes me uncomfortable, you know? I don't get how Tim can be so... Self aware. All the time." Jason brought the bottle up to his lips, then sighed and set it back down. "I just. It's hard, B."

"I apologize, for that. It wasn't my intention, to..." He waves a hand, in lieu of saying what they both knew. "He knows, in the back of his mind, but he deals with it by ignoring and forgetting it. Much like his other problems"


	13. Chapter 13

"Master Bruce, Master Jason... you might wish to see this." Alfred appears, looking grimmer than usual.

Jason swallows nervously and steps forwards. "Yes, Alfred?"

Alfred motions for them to follow, and leads them to one of the TV rooms, which is playing the news. The current headline is a four car accident, and one of the participants was a dark-haired young man on a motorcycle. it's unclear if he is unconscious or dead, at the moment.

Jason whispers "no" before his knees stop working, an he falls to them. He can't take his eyes off the screen.

Bruce is gone, and it isn't clear until he gets back where he left. He comes back with Dick, who's unconscious and a little battered but still alive, and all Bruce has to do is fix him up. It'll be fine. Hopefully. There's a bit of damage to his head but it shouldn't be unfixable.

Jason doesn't move from his spot until Alfred casts the thousandth worried glance at him, and he leaves the room to head to his own. Part of him wants to slam Tim's door down, make him come out and help, but he just. Doesn't.

Bruce is in the cave, working on Dick. Physical repairs were done within minutes, but the circuitry was outdated and he had to actually *relearn* how he'd programmed Dick's brain to work. It could take days to weeks before his brain was ready to be returned, but his body was nearly up and running.

It took two days before Jason went mad with worry and knocked on Tim's door.

Tim had just woken up, and Damian was still asleep. He opened the door, robe sort-of draped over his shoulder. 

"Yes?"

"Dick got in an accident."

Tim pauses. "What?"

"Dick, you know how he's shit at driving? Yeah, we'll, he. He got upset and went for a ride, to see Eska. And. He crashed."

Tim's hand clenches, in the door. "Where is he?"

"Down. Cave. Bruce. He's, fixing him? I don't know. Haven't left my room since the accident."

Tim sighs through his nose, and carefully pulls his fingers out of the wood. "Come. We're going to go see him. Bruce will explain."

"No, you can go, I. Can't. I just *can't*." he shakes his head and backs away, ending up back-to-back with Damian's door.

Tim frowns. "...Fine. Keep Damian company"

Jason nods and heads into Tim's room. "Please, fix Dick?"

"I'll do my best." Tim growls, and heads downstairs. He's pulled the robe on properly now, mostly as a courtesy to Alfred.

Jason takes off his shirt before climbing into the bed. It had been days since he last slept, because he just *hadn't* been able to. Not with Dick in the cave. But he's exhausted, and there's his little brother and a warm bed, so within minutes he's passed out.

Tim was in the cave in ten minutes, and found Bruce after another three. Bruce was sitting at his desk, pouring over a piece of technology- a piece of *Dick*- while the rest of his oldest laid on a gurney a few feet to his left. Tim coughed to get Bruce's attention.

Bruce glanced up at his son over the time of his work-glasses, and the slightest hint of a smile comes to his face. Mostly he's just tired, but he's always up for seeing his sons. "Tim."

"What happened? He's usually much more careful."

"I called him and Jason in to talk about a recent observation I had made, he grew emotional, and left. If I had known he was going to try to drive, trust me, I would have stopped him."

Tim sighed. "What observation was it?" He walked over, to inspect Dick. He looked intact, but...

"All of my sons are romantically interested in each other. Looking back, it seems silly to have called them in, and even so soon after... I am not a wise man."

Tim can't help but snort. "You're plenty wise. You just don't get people. Most of us don't get people"

Bruce nodded. "But, Dick gets people. He always has. Is that ironic, or just sad? He understood more than any of us." He laughs bitterly and sets his tools down to run a hand through his hair.

"He's not dead. You've fixed him up, mostly. What are you working on?"

"One of the circuit boards that goes just under where his heart would go. In the accident he didn't have much physical damage, but quite a few circuits and systems were damaged. And he's older software, so I'm upgrading him. He deserves better."

Tim can't help but hum softly. He pauses, as he looks at Dick's face. "Where's his brain?"

"On my computer, I'm going to fix a few things that were damaged, and remove or compress some things. His memory wasn't damaged, but he's had trouble with it for years."

Tim sighs. "And he refused to let you check him out, didn't he?" He asks, running a hand over his face tiredly.

"You know it. Jason asked for some work done the other day, before everything, and I feel bad that I can't get to that yet."

"He's worried sick. Came woke me up to send me down here to help an everything. How long 'til Dick'll be able to assure Jason he's fine himself?"

"A couple weeks, a month maybe? I'm already putting the wedding off by six months."

"Wedding?" Tim pauses. What.

"Yes, Selina and I are getting married. It was planned for this month, but I'm putting it off until there's less happening."

"...ah. That's... smart." Tim sighs. "Anything I can help with, while I'm down here?"

"Yes, there's a file near his dreams and sleep and power-down file folder, and it's filled with fears and bad experiences. He'd been having night terrors, and those definitely weren't helping with his mental stability. Could you move those for me?"

Tim hums. moving to look at the data. As he does, he learns... things. Dick's coping mechanism might seem funny, from a distance, but really, it spoke volumes about his mental stability. And, as he reworked the night-terrors into simple fears, and then the fears were moved toward anger and pain, rather than the dreams. It was... enlightening, really.

The last time Dick had let Bruce do anything, he had been fifteen and still trusted his father. Then he became rebellious, then he became scared of change. And Bruce had respected Dick's choices, but now it was out of hand.

Tim glanced at Bruce. "You're not gonna try and rewrite his personality, are you? I know he's a little difficult, but"

Bruce set down his tools and looked up at Tim. "I'm honestly offended that you would even ask that. I would never do that to him, or you, or Jason. Never. You are my sons as you are, I just want to make sure that you are all okay. Everything I am doing are things that, once upon a time, Dick would have *asked* me to do. Like Jason, with his taste buds request. Dick asked me when he was six to remove the nightmares, and I did it then, as I am having you do now."

Tim sighed. "Sorry. It's just... Talia offered to do that, for the duration of my stay and the whole idea has bothered me since" He scratched the back of his neck. "It's easy to forget, when comparing her to Ra's and even you, and seeing all that compassion, she was raised to be as efficient as possible. Sorry, I'm... still a bit frazzled." He glanced down with a sigh.

Bruce nodded. "I understand, you've been through something traumatic. And then there's the added bit that it took a month for your closest family and loved ones to realize you were missing and come find you. I get it." He pulls off the glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose. "I just can't imagine doing anything to change the personalities of any of my sons. All those files are locked, you know, and only Alfred has the password. I would never do that, and even if I wanted to, he would have to approve of the situation."

Tim nods a little. "Failsafe"

"Exactly. Alfred loves all of you too. Only in a case that he was comfortable with, would I be allowed to even consider changing the coding on any of those personality files."

"Trauma would be an acceptable reason, if It was integrated into our personality and you wanted to remove it" Tim notes. He runs a hand through his hair. "I still can't believe... What did you say, to make him run?"

"It actually was not me, he was talking about what he found attractive in Jason when he became upset and ran off. I believe his last point was Jason's intelligence. He mentioned dropping out of high school before leaving."

Tim sighed. "He feels inferior. Which is weird, since Jay and I both have felt inferior of *him*. It's weird"

Bruce shrugged. "We all have those thoughts in the back of our minds, Tim."

"But... Ugh. I'm too tired for this. Just... send him up when you're done messing with him, ok?" Tim stands up, putting his tools down and heading toward the stairs

Bruce nods again and puts his glasses back on before picking his tools back up. "Will do."

Tim grunts, and heads up to his room. Once there he bullies Damian into holding him while he sleeps.


	14. Chapter 14

When Jason wakes up, He's in Tim's room, with Damian and Tim asleep, next to him. He wonders how he managed to finally get in here, then *not* be in the mood for sex or even a blow job.

Tim shifts, grumbling. He rolls until he's hugging Jason and falls back asleep.

Jason reaches for his shirt, because his *phone* is in there and hey, maybe he can play some games until they're awake and ready to do... Whatever it was Damian and Tim did in this dark, postered neat-messy dungeon.

Tim growled, when Jason moved, and tugged him closer.

Okay, shit, Tim was stronger than he was. Maybe he could be reasoned with?

"Tim, please let me go, I need my phone."

Tim grunts. "Phone can wait. Snuggle now."

"But what if Roy snapchatted me a picture of him getting fisted? Or Kory finally tried lesbian sex? I need to know, Timbo."

"If you try to leave this bed you will lose all privileges you earned by being allowed in the room"

"Then I no longer need to know. You have cured me, baby brother."

Tim hums, and nuzzles closer

There is a stirring on the opposite side of Tim, and then Damian is awake and snuggly. "What is happen?" he murmurs into Tim's neck. 

"I'm here now." Jason says. 

"Mm."

"The threesome is happening sooner than expected" Tim mumbles, but doesn't move to act on the words.

Jason moves his hand back to grab Tim's ass. "Mhm. If only there wasn't a family crisis blue-balling us."

"Still sooner than expected" Tim mumbles, cuddling. "Bruce's almost done, Dick's just so out-of-date his brain needs upgrading"

"Upgrading? What about... Dick? Is he gonna still be *him*?"

"Bruce has a failsafe. He can't modify our personalities without Alfred's go ahead"

"But he's doing a ton to Dick, how's that *not* gonna change him?"

"He's upgrading the software but keeping the programming and memories constant. It's like... let's say Damian got into an accident and lost a leg. He gets a peg to replace it, and then a few years later gets an actual prosthetic leg that lets him feel with it and everything. Would that change him?"

"Yes." Damian mumbles from behind Tim.

"Damian. I'm talking about personality, not experience"

"I would happier. Much." he kisses Tim's neck.

"See? That's all he's doing"

Jason stays quiet for a minute, then turns so that he's facing his brothers. "Okay, of y'all say so. Now quick, kiss me."

Tim grabs Jason by the jaw and yanks him into a kiss, hard and rough.

Jay hadn't been expecting that, so he just moans into the kiss, trying to catch up. How Tim could be this aggressive so early in the morning, he would never know. 

Damian pulls his face from Tim's neck, and watches as the two kiss. He nods slowly, sleepily. "Good."

Tim pulls back, and then buries his face in Jason's neck, nipping lightly.

"Jay, you said the other day that you were interested in my piercings." Now *that* grabbed his attention.

Tim grins. "They're great for blowjobs" He pipes up, speaking into Jason's neck. "Just saying"

Jason groaned. "Trust me, I would *love* to wrap my lips around you and see, Dami, but your boyfriend is inbetween me and you." 

Damian let one eyebrow rise, and slid an arm around Tim's waist to trail lightly around Jason's. "Oh?"

Tim giggles. "I could *easily* suck you off from here, and you could do it for Dami, and doesn't that sound great?"

"That does, but I'm. Not in the mood? I just really want to know what those piercings are like. I don't think I really want to have anything done to me right now, I'd feel too uncomfortable. After I know golden boy is okay, then I'll be comfortable. Promise." He grins, then slides down and climbs over Tim to straddle Damian's knees.

Tim pouts, but he allows it, choosing instead to watch. "You're not gonna stop him in the middle like you did to me, are you?" He asks, sounding a little petulant.

"Why would I stop him?" Damian asks. "I know what he wants."

Tim snorted. "I thought I made my wants pretty clear, but you stopped me *twice*"

"What I wanted was not taken into consideration. I wanted to please you as well, and did not stop you again out of fear." He rolled his eyes. 

Jason glanced between the two. "Trouble in paradise, I presume?"

"I told him if he didn't let me suck him off properly I'd castrate him with my teeth"

"That." Jason tried to find words. "You can't reattach *his*." he sighs.

"But I *can* still use it as a dildo, and then I won't necessarily need him around. If he doesn't let me do what I want to him, he faces consequences"

"Make it temporary. Not, not *that*."

Tim huffs. "I probably wasn't going to go through with it, maybe"

"Still." Jason rolled his eyes and bent down, pulling the covers down Damian's torso slowly.

Tim whistled.

Damian was half hard by the time the blanket was at Jason's knees, and his eyebrow rose. "I don't see a piercing..."

Damian elected to stay silent, a half smirk on his face.

"There's more than one place to get one, Jay"

Jason's eyes lit up at the possibilities, and he bent down to kiss the crown of Damian's dick. At the shiver of anticipation that he felt, not saw, he wrapped his lips around it and slid them down, slowly. Not more than an inch of two down, he felt the twin metal balls, on either side of Damian's vein. He made a hum of approval, and heard the breathy moan from above him.

Tim whistled again.

Jason kept going down for a moment more, then let the tip of his tongue catch the metal bits. His brother's hips jerked reflexively, but his hands slid up to hold him down. There was a whine from Damian, followed by a snicker from Tim.

"Jerking your hips is bad when you're getting a bj, Damian. Do you want to kill him?"

Jason pulled off to turn and state at Tim. "I'm more hardy than that, kid, I just need warning. No one like having dicks shoved down their throats," he turned to wink at Damian. "Well, us three do, but. Warning. It's nice, got it?" Damian nodded.

Tim snorted. "Yeah, yeah." He waves his hand. "Keep going, we're still recording"

"What do you mean, recording?" Jason asked, reaching down to trail a finger down Damian's dick.

"Video cameras"

"I didn't think B had any in here?"

"Who says they're Bruce's?"

"Ooh, you're a kinky SOB." Jason grinned. "I like that."

"I thought we knew I'm kinky." Tim grins a little wolfishly. "And aren't *you* here because of one of your kinks?"

"I'm here because Dick is currently inaccessible. However, this dick is not, so. Yeah." He bends back down before Damian can say something and takes his cock back into his mouth. After that move, Damian has no complaints.

"You wanted a threesome earlier because of his piercings. And Dick'll keep you busy when he's up and running, don't worry"

Jason would've responded, but a hand found it's way into his hair, fisting the curls and keeping him down. The action was accompanied by a "Stay" in Arabic from Damian. This earned an extra hard scrape of his teeth against Damian's dick, but that didn't deter him.

Tim snickers.

Jay took more of Damian into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks around the member. He'd had and given many a blow job in his time, but the feeling of those metal balls just made everything... Fantastic. They bumped against his tongue, caught on his teeth when he pulled off to catch his breath and suck on them, and just generally excited him. He didn't get hard, because he hadn't been lying earlier, but it was still just so... Awesome.

Tim had gotten bored of watching, and had pulled out Jason's phone, whistling a certain song. 

Soon Jason had begun to hum the song around Damian's cock, which sent him over the edge, hips jerking up as he finished.

"Oh, wow."

"Looks like you really know how to let it go, Dami." Jay grinned as he pulled back to rock on his heels. 

Damian groaned and pulled his feet out from under Jay, rolling over. "No. Heard it too much already." he mumbles.

"Roy is oddly flexible"

Jason let an eyebrow rise. "What are you talking about?"

"He sent you a snapchat of him and... his brother? Blonde haired dark skinned kid, doing... something. The picture's blurry but I am also certain he's twisted into a pretzel"

"Dude, tell me you saved it. Connor is super hot and Roy, he's awesome."

"I saved it. It had a caption but not in a language I recognized"

Jay grinned. "Can't wait, Dickie!" he practically purrs, before realizing his mistake. "Shit. Um. I mean Tim. Sorry, I was thinking about how flexible Dick is."

"mmmmm." Tim closes his eyes. "You should take pictures later. High quality pictures"

"So you can satisfy your creepy voyeurism kink? Why not just tap into B's vc's and watch it live?"

"Who says I won't be? But Pictures... pictures are better" Tim sighs. "Pictures capture the moment, and it's usualy the *best* moment, or at least the most intense, and the emotion you can pick up on in a picture, the clarity-" He waves his hands a little"-it's breathtaking"

"So you are sexually attracted to pictures then, got it." Jay gave him a thumbs up. "Whatever floats your boat."

"It's not sexual! Don't be so vulgar"

"I'm not! That's just the vibe I was getting, Timbo! Am I not allowed to have opinions based on observation?"

"If it were sexual I would've mentioned it! I'm insulted"

"Does that mean you hate me and I have to leave?"

"...not yet. You look good on camera... Also, I sent a snapchat to Roy of you and Damian, I hope you don't mind"

Jay shrugged. "Did they ask about the hair?"

"Haven't replied- oh. Roy's questioning who Damian is and the hair"

"Just take a selfie and wink and say 'brothers bonding time'."

"Kiss him, so I can get you two in the picture with me"

Jay leans down and presses his and Damian's mouths together, only barely keeping the smile off his lips and his eyes off the camera.

Tim snaps the picture, and shoots it off. "Done"

Damian pushes Jay off, and he laughs. "Nice. Thank you, Timmy."

"Anytime" Tim tosses Jason his phone, reaching for Damian.

Jay inspects the shot of Roy and figures out how he had been positioned, *what* was in his mouth, and how Connor had gotten his dick to do *that*. The return snapchat is Roy staring at the camera wide eyed and open mouthed, Connor grinning, then them kissing and the caption "us too"

Tim has tackled Damian and is very happily mouthing his neck. He'd been restraining himself.

While his brothers had talked, Damian had texted Cass asking for advice. She just said not to look a gift horse in the mouth, and that he had attractive boys who wanted him, don't give that up. When Tim kisses his neck, Damian turns the phone off before melting into his arms.

Tim purrs, nuzzling Damian's pulse point and sprawling on top of him.

Jason stated at them for a moment before snapping a picture for Roy. "Love birds" he captions it. The return shot is of Roy doing a... Handstand? With the caption "where's dick".


	15. Chapter 15

Dick had woken up, and had sat up slowly. It took him *way* too quickly to figure out where he was (cave, medical table, Bruce's workshop) and his memories were *way* too detailed what the ever loving hell--?

He sat up, and swung his legs off the able, heading upstairs. He passed Bruce, who did a double take and probably said something, but Dick's ears were picking up *too* much to discern what he'd said, so he ignored it. He didn't bother going to the garage, he remembered driving and then pain, so it was out. Walking would be safer and help clear his head, especially since he can't trust his reflexes right now(they're too precise he's over compensating for every step he has to relearn everything what the hell).

Oswald Loomis had moved to Gotham after he finished taking vengeance on his father's murdered, because there was *nothing* for him in Chicago. Gotham was dirty and filled with people just like him, so he could live just like he was used to. His friend RedRobin (yum), hadn't responded to any of his messages in a while, and he was determined to find out why. Plus, hey, it was *Gotham*, land of the sleazy and the free. He's working on a prank now, because he needs some cash. Credit card hacks are probably the easiest thing he knows how to do. He notices, sort of, that it's raining outside. Huh.

Dick had been walking for two hours, it had started raining thirty minutes in. He didn't get sick so he didn't care. Even if leather felt weird when wet, and he probably looked like a drowned cat. Every spatter of rain was like a gunshot, he couldn't help but flinch. He still needed to clear his head, but his thoughts kept straying to why he'd woken up in the cave and what Bruce must have done. He couldn't think about it, it wouldn't help him calm down, but he couldn't *not* think about it, either.

The abandoned Wayne warehouse he was set up in loved to leak, and Os hated that. So he had a network of buckets filled with rainwater scattered throughout the building. He was in the middle of setting up a tarp over his electronics and sleeping area when he heard a bucket get knocked over. 

He doesn't know what to do, so he hides. Hides and waits.

Dick stares at the bucket, not quite sure what to do. Normally, he'd right it and mop up the mess. But there are no mops here, in this abandoned building, because it's abandoned. Which means there shouldn't be a bucket to knock over in the first place. He stares for a good five minutes before his manners get the best of him and he rights it, using his jacket(probably too wet to help, but it does an admirable job anyway) mopping up the bit of water he'd spilled. He sighs, and sits down, head between his knees. He needs to just. Stop thinking, it's why he ducked into the building in the first place.

When no one comes to attack him, no one comes to tell him that he's trespassing and needs to leave *right now*, Os gets curious. He grabs the only weapon he can think of- a cold soldering iron- and walks off to go find whoever knocked the bucket over. Hey, maybe it's just a dog. He wants it to be a dog. He's praying for it to be a dog. 

Then he makes it to where the fallen bucket was, and he can tell because the floor is covered in water and there is a guy sitting there. A guy with black hair and a sopping wet leather jacket on the floor next to him. After a minute or two of staring at him, Os decides to say something to him.

"Uh. Excuse me? Hi."

Dick jolts, half-strangled curse, probably in Romani, falling from his lips. He clutches his head a little, everything is too loud. He'd nearly tuned out the rain when something had come approaching, he'd been hoping it was an animal. Maybe a dog, dogs made things better. The person spoke too loud, though. He curled in on himself a little.

Os frowned. "Are, um, you okay?" He asks, stepping forwards a but more.

"Too much"

"Too much what?" Os asks, looking around. The only thing he can think is that the guy is a druggie, and took too much of whatever. "Are you on something? Because I can get you help but. I'm not supposed to be here either so."

"S-sensory overload, can't. Concentrate" His voice bugs, and he tenses, he can *hear* how artificial it sounds, it's disgusting-

"Do you need help with that? I can. I can help with that."

"H-how?" His voice is definitely distorted, he sounds like a broken animatronic.

"I have earmuffs, so that you hear everything through a filter. If it's not coming straight to you, you could have more of yourself in control so we can figure out what's wrong."

Dick nods a little. "Thank you"

"The only thing I ask is that you don't tell anyone I'm here, okay?"

Dick nods again. He can keep secrets.

"Alright, I'll be right back. Okay?" Os turns and starts walking back to his area, so he can grab the earmuffs he usually used when something happened.

Dick nods again, and uncurls slightly. His hands are still positioned by his ears, but he isn't curled in on himself so tightly. He keeps his eyes shut, for now. Hearing was enough as it is, adding sight would just make it worse. He crosses his legs, rather than holding them up to his chest.

Os comes back to the guy, and kneels down in front of him. "I'm gonna put these on you, okay? Okay." He reaches forwards, placing the earmuffs on his ears. To do so, he has to push the guy's hands off his ears.

Dick lets him, and relaxes, breathing a sigh of relief when they're in place. He smiles, opening his eyes a little. "Thank you"

Os is taken back by how *beautiful* his eyes are, and he bites his lip, nodding. "Mhm."

Dick shifts slightly, pulling at the sweater he had on. It wasn't as wet as his jacket, but it was still uncomfortable. He forgot he wasn't wearing his usual concealer, so the seam on his neck was very visible when he peeled the fabric back.

"You're a?" He starts, then puts his hands on the guy's cheeks, studying him.He can see more seams now, see every little detail, even through the dark. "Holy shit, you're *fantastic* and, holy fuck. The only company with this level tech is Wayne, that explains a lot. Damn." He smiles. "What's your name?"

"Grayson. Richard Grayson"

"Richard Grayson? As in that Wayne company's CEO's ward?"

Dick nods, smiling a little. "Bruce has kept our origins a secret pretty well, huh?" It felt weird, acknowledging he wasn't human, but he knew Jason and Tim both knew, too. And, this guy seemed to *like* that Dick wasn't... real. He wasn't sure how to feel about that.

"Well, there was much discussion on the internet, but most just think he saved you from a child trafficking ring. I just. You're *beautiful* and. Wow." He reaches down and picks up Dick's hand, unsure how he hadn't recognized him immediately. He studies it, turning it over in his hands and marveling at everything.

Dick chuckled softly. "Nah, just built us in the caves beneath the manor, not that those are common knowledge either. Guess we'll both be keeping secrets?"

"Yeah, but atleast he owns that manor." Os glances back up at Dick's face, and brushes some blonde hair out of his eyes. "What brought you all the way out here though? Long way from any part of town considered good."

Dick smiled a little. "Well, I needed to get out. To move, I guess. I got into an accident... earlier, I don't know how long I've been out. But everything was too much, and I couldn't really concentrate on anything, so I ran. Not the first time, probably won't be the last"

"You couldn't concentrate? You probably had a system update, I mean, you have been around for atleast twenty years. If things were cleared out, or you got a better set of coding, that might explain the whole situation. And I remember hearing about the accident, it was. It sounded pretty bad."

"I don't really remember. I have a hunch I totaled my bike, though"

Os nodded. "Yeah, people on tumblr were trying to figure out ways someone could survive slamming headfirst into a steel pole."

Dick winces. "Yeesh" He sighs a little. "Bet there was a surprising lack of blood, too"

"There was some. But it was off-color and didn't dry the way normal blood does, and Wayne employees took care of the scene instead of the police. It was intense." He shrugged. "It was announced that you were in a medically-induced coma due to brain trauma, but were doing fine. It doesn't sound too far from the truth, now."

"Bruce probably had to rebuild my brain, so I really shouldn't be surprised. I don't particularly like check-ups, but now I probably won't need one for a few months at least. I'll just need to get used to... everything. Thank you, again"

"You're welcome, I just. Wow. You're so amazing, I think *I'll* need some time to get used to it." He smiles and gives Dick back his hand.

Dick chuckles. "You should see Tim, he's the most advanced of the three of us. Makes his own upgrades, too." Dick scratches the back of his neck. "I'm just an old prototype"

"Tim? He's the youngest, right? Well, it doesn't matter if he's more advanced, you're both amazing. I've never seen anything as advanced as you, I've never met someone as interesting as you. Hell, I've never heard of anyone taking a *thing* and making it into a real person and. I can't deal with this, programming is my life, you're amazing and I'm probably never going to meet you again and. I just." He takes a deep breath. "Thank you for showing up at this warehouse."

"Tim's second youngest, Damian's a real boy" Dick giggles a little. "And if you're gonna be hiding out here, I might have to stop by again. You're fun to talk to, doesn't feel like I'm walking a minefield like with everyone else..." Dick trails off, thinking.

"Why would it be a minefield, it sounds like they're all self-aware like you. There was another kid too, right, maybe a girl? Second oldest? Are they like you?"

"I wasn't actually self-aware, before the accident. I knew, in the back of my mind, but honestly the whole idea of... this, made me feel broken, so I repressed the knowledge. Hard. Jason had an existential crisis, when he figured it out, and ended up in a scrap metal facility. We had a funeral, if you'll remember. He came back recently, and it's been really great, but I just... And Tim figured it out almost immediately, he knows he's not human and he embraces it, he's the most well-adjusted of all of us. Cass is human, and so is Damian. She was adopted, Damian's Bruce's flesh and blood."

Os nodded. "That makes sense. You really didn't know about it? Was it hard? Or was it easier to just pretend, or did you really feel like you were something different than what you are?"

"It was easier to pretend, and the other encouraged it. Might have something to do with how I went catatonic the first time I saw the cave in full... Scared Bruce pretty badly." Dick sighed. "It scared me, so I didn't think about it"

"That's okay. It's alright not to think about things." Os is reminded about his own history, and about his father's death and the path to vengeance that ended up leading him here. The end justified the means, but he doesn't know what it says about him that the end he was seeking was the death of a pair of brothers.

He elects to stop thinking about that, focus on Dick.

Dick runs a hand over his face. His other hand lands on his jacket, and he grimaces. "Ruined my bike and my leathers in one go, I'm on a roll, huh?"

"Well, sure, but you can always get more. Get them fixed." Os shrugged. He had money too, but none of it was legal, and there was always a moment of worry whenever he paid for something at the counters, a moment of "Will it work? Is this it?".

"I modified that bike over the last 10 years, it was my baby" He sniffs a little.

Os reached out and rested his hand on Dick's shoulder. "Then you know it better than anyone, you have the knowledge an the means to fix it. Make it just as good as the day you last rode it."

"Bruce threw it out"

Os winced. "Ouch."

"Yeah." He rubbed his face. "Jay threatened to throw it out too, cause he felt I didn't drive safely enough, but really, I was fine. One accident compared to over 20 years of driving is pretty good"

"That's really good. I've seen a lot of articles online though, people were worried? They always thought if someone wanted to hurt you, the easiest way was to attack you when riding. You drove fast, and it always seemed reckless, and a lot if things were said. Have you ever seen the memes?"

"...no?"

"Oh, well they exist." Os smiles. "Just curious, how long were you planning to stay? I'm not protesting, but my legs are falling asleep. We could move to the other part of the warehouse, I have chairs. And a bed."

"I needed to clear my head and try to process everything, I probably shouldn't leave 'til I can walk without feeling nauseous" He gets up, picking up his jacket and shaking it a little. "Sorry for the inconvenience"

"It's no inconvenience, I just don't have much on hand."

"Then it's an inconvenience. Ya know what? I own a theatre a few blocks that way." He motions toward the general direction of the center of Gotham. "I get enough revenue to live on my own, I could siphon some of it to you, you look like you could use it. I could probably even talk Bruce into signing this place over to you, if you want"

"Seriously?" Os asked, eyes narrowing in confusion. "You'd do that for someone who hasn't even introduced themselves to you yet?"

"Sure!"

"Oh. Well, then I might be inclined to introduce myself." He smiles and offers Dick his hand. "Oswald Loomis, call me Os."

Dick takes it, shaking his hand firmly. "Richard Grayson, though you know that. Call me Dick"

"I will, gladly. It's a pleasure to meet you, but let's get somewhere my legs won't fall asleep, please?" He stands, stumbling. "Ah, too late."

Dick wraps an arm around Os's torso. "Gotcha, sorry 'bout the chill, I'm a little wet"

"It's 'kay, I've lived in places like this long enough, I'm used to it." He doesn't say that Dick is actually warm, warm and comfortable next to him. His sweater gets Os' shirt wet though, and that's not fun, but the other is *tall* and. Wow.

"You looked taller when we were sitting" Dick notes.

"You didn't seem so tall when we were sitting."

Dick giggles. "Everybody underestimates me. The number of people who do a double take when I stand up the first time in front of them is unreal"

"I understand why now, I always thought you were short."

"Nope! Tallest of my brothers, I'm a little shorter than Bruce, though. Tim calls him Big McTallHuge"

"I'm with him on that one. You know, it's weird, I have a friend who calls his dad that. He's actually the reason I'm in Gotham." Os turns, leading Dick down a hallway to the part of the warehouse that is his living space.

"Oh? Who's this friend?" Dick follows eagerly, like a puppy.

"I don't actually know, I just know that he's from the rich part of Gotham and that his username is RedRobin." Os shrugged.

Dick freezes, and his body lurches. He shuts down suddenly, slumping to the floor.

Os falls with him, a yell of surprise accompanying it. He doesn't know what's wrong, except Dick is *on the ground* and it was something he said and he needs to talk to RedRobin *right fucking now*. Luckily, he has his phone (it's more jailbroken than he is) and can message RedRobin.

"Rob I need help please all jokes aside I have an unconscious dick grayson literally right here also i'm in gotham please i need you"

Tim is checking his messages, just in time to get it. "Wait, Dick Grayson? He's with you???"

"yes he's with me right now and i don't know what's wrong apparantly he's not human and i'm happy for him because he's fantastic and he's a great person and i'm scared robin please what do i do"

"...Did you say robin in front of him?"

"yeah he mentioned his brother calling their dad something that you use so i mentioned you by your handle, is that like a trigger or something?"

"It's a failsafe father programmed into us, each of us has a word or two that shuts us down. Dick's is robin"

"Fuck- wait, does that mean that you're his brother? Tim? I had a hunch but I wasn't sure."

"This wasn't how I planned spilling the beans, but yes. You probably want to turn him on again, there should be a latch on the back of his left ear. Flick it twice."

Os leans around Dick, and has to move his hair to get to the spot, but he finds it, and flicks it twice, just like Robi- Tim told him to.

Dick's eyes flicker, and he groans. "What hit me...?"

"Nothing, just, apparently something I said is a trigger. I'm not gonna say it again, because that wouldn't make sense."

"...Okay" Dick sits up. "So, who's your friend, again?"

"I just learned he's your brother when I sent him a panicked message and you collapsed." Os stands, and offers Dick a hand.

Dick takes it, nodding a little. "Which brother is he?"

"Tim." Os pulls Dick up, and smiles. "Well, I'm glad I know who he is now, makes it a lot easier to find him so we can finally make one of the collab projects. I'm better with the computer part, but he's *outstanding* with the hardware."

"I'm not surprised, he's always tinkering with stuff. You know sometimes he takes his head off while he does? It's really creepy"

"That's crazy, I can't imagine doing that ever."

"True, but I probably could. Not that I will, I'd probably lose my head"

Os chuckled, and started walking in the direction of his "room". "I wouldn't lose mine, per say, but it would come back to me in worse shape than it was before."

Dick giggled. "Yeah. Well, I should probably call Bruce. Got a couple business plans to discuss"

Os nodded, and opened the door to the smaller room which he'd considered his room for the past several months.

Dick pulled out a phone, dialing as h walked into the room. He looked around, as he waited for B to pick up.

Bruce hdan't really been expecting his son to call him, he'd been expecting something more along the lines of "never seeing him again" or a group of men kidnapping Dick in his vulnerable state. But, now Dick was calling him. Probably of his own volition. He picks up, saying "Hello?"

"Hi! How're you?" Dick grins a little.

"Wondering where my eldest son is. But mostly I'm just thinking about Alfred's blueberry pie, no offense."

"None taken, Alfie's a god" He giggles a little. "I'm in an abandoned Wayne-tech building, couple blocks from my theatre. Can you sign it to me?"

"Sure, what's the address and occasion? You're not building a nightclub like Queen did, are you?"

"What? No. There are plenty of Nightclubs in Gotham. Call this a pet project" Dick giggles. He rattles off the address, grinning at Os a little.

Os smiled back, but Bruce couldn't see the object of his son's current fascination. "Should I be worried? Last time you had a pet project you built a theater, and the time before *that* the ballroom became home to an elephant for a year and a half."

"Don't you trust me?" Dick put as much pout as he could into his voice.

"Yes, but I'm your parent. I'm supposed to be cautious. And the mayor told me that if there's another elephant incident I have to move out of Gotham city limits.

"No elephants, Eska's my one true love, you know that"

"I know, I'm just saying. He told me that if there was anything in the zoo that involved the elephants, he would be looking at us."

"Well I promise I'm not bringing any new elephants or Eska to this building. I don't know what's happening with it just yet, but I can promise you that"

Bruce sighed. "Do you promise I won't regret this?"

"Yep!" Dick crowed.

"Fine." Bruce said. "I'll have it signed over to you within a week. Do you need anything else? Someone to go in and clean it up? I'm sure it's been used illegally, it's in the worst part of town."

"Nah, it's fine. I've got it covered, Bruce. You *could* get me a bike the same year and model as my baby was, though. That would be very nice"

"Are you going to forgive me for getting rid of that bike?"

"Never"

"Will signing the warehouse over to you ease your hatred?"

"Yes!"

"Let me just talk to Miranda, the head of properties and real estate. I'll call back in two hours." Bruce hangs up, then prepares himself for the worst two hours of his life, because Miranda isn't his favorite employee to work with, though she is damn good at her job. Too good.

"Ok! Bye, Bruce" Dick puts his phone away, grinning at Os again. "That went well"

"Sounds like it. Who's Eska?"

"My elephant. She's my baby"

Os smiled. "Aw, she sounds great. Where is she?"

"Gotham zoo. I was heading to see her, when that accident happened" He frowns. "It's been too long since I saw her, she's gonna be worried sick"

"Well the Zoo's closed today due to the storm that's coming, and it probably won't be open until it passes. Florida's happy that the hurricane skipped them, but instead it's coming up here. You know, I haven't in Gotham long, but it was brighter when you were walking around."

"Oh, it's never bright for long. Summer in Gotham is like, a week long"

"That explains it then." Os chuckles. "But seriously. The media was actually reporting happy stuff when you and your brothers were out and about."

"We had family complications. Tim got kidnapped, and Damian was missing, and when we figured out where Tim was we had to crash a wedding..."

"That would also explain why I haven't heard from him in a while. Why did it take so long to figure that out?"

"Well, at first we thought he and Damian eloped, but then I found a note in his room disregarding that theory"

"Huh. Why would they need to elope? Red said he had been with him for years."

"Well Bruce forbade them from doing anything 'til Dami was legal, for reasons, and we thought Tim gave up on waiting. After we crashed his wedding and got him home he decided to spend a month smashing that rule with a jackhammer. Or so I assume, last day I remember before today was day 5 of that month"

"So after being away for a month and being presumed to have eloped, they said fuck it and had a lot of wild sex?" He nods appreciatively. "Go Red."

"Yeah. Damian also got taller, tattoos, and according to Jason some very interesting piercings"

"Ooh, I'm sure that made the wild sex fun."

"Probably, wouldn't know. Jay might, though"

"They're already doing threesomes, and you decided to miss out on that?" Os raises an eyebrow.

"Been unconscious from an accident for I don't know how long?"

"No I mean. Staying here."

"I like you, and these are yours." He motions to the earmuff he's still wearing. "It'd be horribly rude to leave with them."

"It's not that rude, you probably need them more than I do."

Dick shook his head. "It's fine, I'm not really into... threesomes, honestly. Make me uncomfortable"

Os cocked his head to the side. "Why?"

"Dunno, I just... Gut instinct?"

Os waited for more to be said, then hums and goes to grab a bottle of water. "Okay."

"Yeah, sorry. Just..." Dick sighs, scratching the back of his neck. "Part of me doesn't want to examine my reasons, I've been ignoring them for years"

"That makes sense, I guess. It's all about your preferences."

"Yeah. I guess"

"Do you want anything?" Os asks, gesturing at the table which he keeps non-perishables on. He really only eats non-perishables, because hey, he doesn't actually have enough electricity running through here to keep a fridge going.

"Can't eat. Never been able to"

"Well, you did just go through a huge system upgrade, maybe your dad decided to change that."

"He didn't upgrade everything, most of my body is still as it was. Just my sensors and brain have been messed with."

"Well, how will you know if you don't try? You've never eaten anything before, that means you've never had a twinkie, or even tried one. I hate them, but I keep them on hand. Come on, one bit, I'm sure he'll surprise you."

Dick sighed. "The last time I tried to eat something I short circuited, forgive me if I don't want to add that to my sensory overload"

Os set the twinkie back down. "Ah, my bad,"

"It's fine, you didn't know." Dick smiled a little. "Once I've talked with Bruce about everything's that been updated I can give it a shot, at least"

"Got it. If I'm right, can I be there the first time you eat something?"

Dick nodded. "Ooh, I could take you to the manor eventually, I bet you'd love the cave"

"The mysterious Wayne's secret cave? I can't see what part of that I *wouldn't* enjoy."

"Yeah!" Dick claps his hands. "It's settled, plus you can meet Tim and Dami and Jay, too. And Alfie, Alfie's a god"

Os grimaced. "A god? No thanks, I don't have a good track record with gods."

"Well, technically he's just our butler, but he's the only reason Jay, Tim and I fit in with modern society. And Bruce, too. He makes all our food and knows everything"

"As long as he didn't pick his title of god, I'll get along with him."

"He doesn't believe us when we call him one, but the family unanimously agrees he is"

"Okay." Os takes a sip of his water, nodding. "Tell me about them, your family. Well, I know about Tim."

"Bruce puts on this front of being super dumb and super into the ladies. He is neither"

"So is his esteemed marriage to Selina Kyle a front?" He thinks for a minute. "Well, they're planning the wedding, anyways."

"Well, to mama S, no. But mama S is the exception, not the rule" Dick grins a little "Or did you think the fact that Tim, Jay and I having black hair, blue(ish) eyes, and similar builds was coincidence?"

"Ah, so the talk on the internet is true." Os chuckles. "I always thought it was pretty fishy that Mr. Wayne kept finding young boys with the same features."

"Yeah, though I'm not sure if Bruce completely realizes he's doing it. Plus he's got the emotional depth of a sponge"

"Doesn't that mean he has a lot of room to soak emotions up?"

"More like he has no understanding of his emotional spectrum and reflects that of others. Maybe he's a mirror in disguise" Dick hums. "Jason is annoyingly hot and thinks he's a burden but everyone in the family loves him. He's dumb"

Os hums, nodding. "Tim's talked about him, a bit. He said something similar about you, except instead of the burden part he said a lot about denial."

"I admit I was in denial. A lot of denial"

"And he mentioned that everyone had crushes on you, but that you were oblivious to it."

"That... I knew about Tim's, a little, and he mentioned Jason's, too. Cass confronted me, once. She kissed me then told me my hugs were better"

Os snickered. "Wow, that's not the nicest thing to hear after being kissed. Did Red or Jason ever make a move?"

"Tim moved onto Damian, after moving on, I assume, and an argument with Jay and Bruce sparked me going out to see Eska, honestly. So, not really" Dick ran a hand through his hair. "I adore Jason, but he's not the only person, either. Babs is a great friend, too. We dated for a while, but after she lost her legs she pushed me away..."

"Babs? I think I remember Red talking about her, and how upsetting the leg situation was. Wasn't it around when Jason was kidnapped, too?"

"Yep. Shit hit the fan spectacularly. After her was Kori, but Kori had to go back home for an arranged marriage. Haven't heard from her since"

"Arranged marriage? Like they do in Asian countries and anywhere they believe women need to wear hijabs all the time, under threat of execution otherwise? Or am I thinking about the fanfiction kind?"

"She's the princess of a small island chain, and apparently there was a war and she had to marry this crusty old guy to stave off more fighting, so kinda like the Asian thing, but without the hijabs"

"Sooo more like fanficion then. Except real and sorta gross."

"Yeah" Dick wrinkles his nose. "It happened around the same time I was thinking of proposing, so I really should've seen something coming"

"That's really bad timing. What would have happened if you'd married her instead of the old guy?"

"I'd've probably left to help her rule, or something. I don't really know what I was thinking" He ran a hand over his face. "There's Roy and Wally, too, but Wally has a wife now, and Roy might be dating his brother, or his brother's best friend, or both. I'm not sure"

Os lets an eyebrow rise. "Biological brother or...?"

"Roy was adopted by Connor's father"

"Okay, so only legally. That's okay. Well, I guess incest is okay too, but only when it's not heterosexual, because incest babies are not okay."

"Yeah." Dick yawns, pulling at his sweater again. "I hate rain"

"Do you want to borrow a jacket? I have a bunch of hoodies and sweatshirts. Have to, it's drafty as fuck in here."

"I could have this place remodeled, so that won't be a problem much longer. And there will be air conditioning, and heating. And probably running water"

"Ooh, keep talking like that Mr. Grayson and I'll swoon."

"I'm getting a carpet installed, definitely. And later I am taking you to my theatre, you deserve to see the arcades"

"Arcade?" Os hums. "Haven't been to one of those in a long time."

"Then I am definitely showing you mine. Tim programmed half the machines in the VIP one"

"A few years ago he asked me to help him program some games, does that mean I helped program half the machines in there too?"

"Probably"

"Then I am excited to play them. What's your opinion of pranks?"

"So long as they don't hurt people and they're meant in good fun, I'm game"

"Wanna plan one?"

"Ooh, is it in general or do we have a target?"

"Tim."

Dick's smile widens. "Ooh. Well, we'll need to be careful, his retaliation is dangerous and can be fatal"

"I don't want to do anything bad, I just want to take advantage of the fact that he's not expecting me."

"I like your style. What did you have in mind?"

"I'm not sure. What do you think he'd appreciate enough not to retaliate to?"

"Most pranks involving Tim have been because he orchestrated them. Though sometimes it's the simpler things, maybe a little jumpscare"

"Well. Maybe we could do something he isn't expecting."

"Does he know what you look like?"

"All he knows is that I have a habit of wearing heels, because I complained about it once."

"Well, you look good in them" Dick grins a little. "Tim knows I'm with you, I'm assuming, so if he sees me with a man in heels his first thought will either be I've found a stripper or it's you"

"So would this be a good chance to try footwear that isn't heels? You're gonna make me feel even shorter than I am."

Dick giggles. "Yeah, not sorry. Ooh, maybe we could rope Jay in to help"

"Maybe. Hey, does anyone know that you're aware now?"

"Nope" Dick pops the p. "Bruce might suspect, but I didn't exactly talk to anyone before I left"

"I might have an idea, but it may be in bad taste. Would a faux-kidnapping be funny to them in retrospect, or should I not even consider that so soon after Red's thing?"

"I've spent more than my fair share of time being kidnapped, I think during my call to Bruce earlier he expected to be given a ransom"

"So would it be funny if we pretended you were being kidnapped by me and you consensually gave me a hand or something?"

"Sure why not. Here" Dick pulled his hand off, handing it over. "Just don't lose it"

"I was planning on sending it to your house."

"Go for it. Use fun fonts in the ransom letter"

"Do I get brownie points if I request pie as the ransom? You mentioned it."

"Yes"

Os takes the hand and sets it down. "Give me five minutes and a list of every pie your god-butler makes."

"Blueberry, Rhubarb, Apple, Orange, Cherry, Lemon Meringue, Peach, Chicken Pot, and Chocolate pudding"

Os taps some keys on his keyboard, then turns and grins at Dick. "I'm asking for one of each, and a starbucks giftcard. Sound good?"

"Yes"

Os hit another key, and the mass of paper, wires, and the occasional sharpie to his left produces a ransom letter in candy inc font.

Dick giggles. "Perfect!"

Os puts on a pair of latex glaves and starts the process of making an envelope out of paper from the middle of a stack, a piece that he knows he hasn't touched. "Should I put some of your hair in it too? I feel like I should snazz it up."

"You can put my Jacket in with my hand, if you want"

"That's too big though. Hm." Os thinks for a moment. "Maybe I could take a picture of you?"

"Sure. Ooh, you could say the thing again so I'm 'unconscious' in it"

"Okay, ooh, even better, I could do a video so it looks like I'm injecting you with something, but the camera wouldn't show my mouth, so they wouldn't be able to tell I was saying it. Then that would leave them confused, mildly uncomfortable, and annoyed that you got kidnapped again."

"Sure! Let's do this"

Os stand and goes to grab the needle and video camera that he keeps, and sets it up so that its viewing a chair. "Sit, I'll stand behind you and not seem so tall."

Dick sits, and makes himself look mildly uncomfortable.

Os sets the camera on a timer, and walks behind Dick, putting a hand on his neck, then producing the needle and pressing it into his skin. It goes in just enough to look suspicious, but not enough that is actually does anything. He counts down the seconds, then presses the end of the needle and says "Robin" loudly enough for Dick to hear, but not enough for the camera to pick up.

Dick slumps, turning off. He goes a little boneless but stays mostly upright.

Os caresses his face, just in then presses a button on a remote that ends the recording. Then he flicks that spot behind Dick's ear twice, and moves away from him to set up the video on a usb.

Dick groans blinking a couple times. "That will never feel normal" He stretches a little.

"I don't think it was supposed to feel normal." Os replies.

"Yeah. But still. We should probably leave this warehouse, since I told Bruce where it is and stuff"

"Do you think he'll go through my stuff?"

"...Probably, if he thinks it'll help him find me"

"Where do we stay? How long are we gonna ride the prank out?"

"Let's go watch a movie and then just go to the manor. Make them question what's going on"

"Okay, but we need to send this to the manor first." He finishes with the envelope, hand, and usb, then puts it into a box with his jacket because, fuck it, why not.

"Yeah!" Dick stands up, and carefully takes off the earmuffs. He seems ok, for now. Probably won't need to curl in on himself.

"You're adjusted to the noise now?" Os asks, reaching for the earmuffs.

"Yeah, I think." Dick smiles a little. "Hopefully I won't freak out again,"

"If you do, just don't run, okay? Not everyone in this city is good. I'm not even sure if I count in that, because I'm not from here, but still."

"Gotham has less good people than most cities. But we accept them" Dick smiles a little. "And if you manage to stay in Gotham for a month or so, you've earned your right to be called a Gothamite"

"Aww, you're so kind. Trust me, if I was sure I'd be allowed to go back to Chicago without everyone trying to kill me, I would, but Gotham does have it's fine points. Like, I've barely talked to anyone in the past two months and I already have three friends! You, Red, and this one douchebag cat that doesn't leave me alone."

"That's very good, I've spent nearly 30 years in Gotham and I only have like, 10"

"Really? Wow." Os goes to his box of clothing, grabs a hoodie and the one pair of not-heels he owns. He puts both on, and glances outside. "Still raining."

"My sweater can stand to get wetter, I'll be fine" Dick grinned. "I own the theatre so nobody can complain if I track water everywhere, either"

"That's true. How do you propose we get this package to the manor? I don't exactly own a car or anything."

"I'll call Babs, we can get her in on it" He pulls out his phone again, and dials the number.

While he does that, Os grabs his phone and sends Tim a message. "Hey Dick's leaving, and I'm gonna go get some stuff. Talk when I get back?"

"Hey Babs, I'm gonna play a prank on Bruce and everyone, can I trust you to help, and not spill the beans? Great"

"Sure. Make sure he doesn't get kidnapped or something"

Os snickers at what his friend says, and shows the message to Dick before responding with "don't worry". "Should I put a pair of my heels in there too?"

"Sure" Dick giggles a little. "I can see Bruce's face of confusion at the heels though, like, he won't get it at all"

"But Tim *will* and isn't he the target anyways?"

"Yes, Bruce is just a fortunate side-victim"

"But. Hilarious side victim."

"Yes!"

"So, is your friend picking up the package at the theater? We should probably head there."

"Yeah, she'll probably wheel there in ten minutes, if we book it we'll get there before her"

"Alright, let's go." He puts a pair of heels in the box, and taps it up real good, keeping the latex gloves on.

Dick nods. "...We're gonna need a reason I'm missing a hand, for my employees. They don't know."

"Okay, put your wrist in my pocket or up my sleeve, we'll pretend we're holding hands."

Dick hides his wrist in Os's pocket, nodding a little. Dick walks them in the direction of the movie theatre, and he *knows* a reporter or twelve are going to see him, see them, walking and 'holding hands' and this is just going to be a really interesting day.

When they reach the theater, Os is happy and surprised. It's a nice place, and he can't wait to see what they'll watch, what they'll play. "Nice place."

"I know right? I stopped Bruce from having it condemned and torn down, it's my baby" He smiles a little sappily. "I love my theatre"

"You seem to have a lot of babies." Os remarks.

"If I raised it, it's my baby"

"I never disputed that, I'm just saying. Should I really be getting into something with someone who has a lot of children?"

"If you can't stand being with someone with three to four kids, you won't like Bruce either"

"It's not that I won't *like* Bruce, it's that I won't trust him or be interested in any advice he has regarding romance."

"Any advice Bruce tries to give you not pertaining to Robotics or Finance, you ignore. Most advice pertaining to Finance, too, really"

"So really only listen if he's talking about you, Jason, and Rob?"

"Or the prototypes and unfinished carcasses in the cave"

"Got it."

"Yep. So, have any preferences? We've got Disney, Disney, and more Disney"

"Hm, got any DreamWorks?"

"I have a couple, but I don't have much. Bruce signed a contract to let me play every piece of Disney animation, not DreamWorks"

"But do you have How To Train Your Dragon?"

"One and Two"

"Let's watch that." Os grinned.

"Both?" Dick grins a little. "That I can do"

Os grinned and chuckled. "I can't wait."

Dick lead him toward a Redhead in a Wheelchair, waiting by the door. "But first... Babs! It's been *way* too long"

Oh, wow. She's pretty. Well, not pretty, gorgeous. Beautiful. Like a Disney princess crossed with a warrior queen. "Uh. Hi."

Babs smiles a little. "Are you his accomplice? Did Dick put you up to pranking a multi-millionaire?" She pushed her glasses up her nose. Dick huffed. "He came up with the idea, we're pretending he kidnapped me" "So just like old times, then. Is Bruce going to call daddy in to come 'rescue' you?"

"If he does, then that would be sorta hard because we're not where we filmed the ransom video, and the ransom is pie."

Babs laughs. "That's genius, you'll love Alfred's pie" "I know, right? And I swear when I called earlier Bruce was expecting a ransom"

"Best not to disappoint, right? Plus I used a fun font." Os smiled.

"Yeah!" Dick giggled. "We need you to deliver this box to the manor, you can pretend to find it, or just leave it in the mailbox if you like" Babs smiled a little. "Of course, Dick." "Love you, Babs" Babs laughed, shaking her head. "Shush"

Os smiled. "Thank you for this."

"Of course, dear. Have fun with your prank, and don't let him do anything stupider than usual" She pats Dick's arm, as she wheels past with the box in her lap. "Bye, Babs" "See you around, Dick"

"I won't let him be stupid. It was nice meeting you!"

"You as well, enjoy your hour or two of fun" She waves, and then continues on to her father's car, the police Commissioner's car. Dick grins. "I'm not stupid, am I?"

"Not that I can tell, but you do stupid stuff sometimes."

"Everyone does stupid things, Tim does stupid things and he's the smartest one in our family" He leads Os into the theatre. "Maria, you there?" A woman behind the concessions stand walks forward. "Play How to Train your Dragon one and two"

"Well, Red can afford to do stupid stuff. You can too. It's normal people who have to worry about stupid stuff."

"Tim's fallen off my bike a few times, if that counts as stupid things. Jay and Bruce too"

"Well, from what I've seen of your riding, you've fallen off once too."

"Once. He's done it twice, and Bruce has done it three times, Jay's only ridden and fallen once"

"How soon did he fall?"

"Jay, Tim, or Bruce?"

"All. Jay?"

"Moment I put my foot on the Gas pedal"

Os snorted. "Seriously?"

"Yep. Had to turn around and pick him up again. He handcuffed himself to me so he wouldn't fall off again"

"That must have been interesting."

"Yep. He cried the entire way here"

"Now that makes me worry."

"I don't have a bike to drive, do I?"

"Well, you probably will soon."

"If Bruce actually goes through with it, he might decide to just get me another car. I have seven, it's all he ever gets us for presents. Cars."

"And you're annoyed by this because?" Os raises his eyebrows and waits for an answer.

"They're all the same car, Just a new year. And he gets *all* of us cars. He got me a car for my 8th birthday"

"What the fuck"

"Yeah!" Maria appears again. "I have the first set up to play, sir. It's in theatre one"

"Thanks Maria!"

"Ooh, snacks too or no?"

"Snacks too. Tell Maria what you want, she'll have it ready in ten minutes or less"

Os nods and turns to her. "Um, is it okay if I have a pizza? Any kind, really."

"We have all types of toppings. Would you like all of them? Or just cheese?" She takes out a notepad.

"What types of toppings?"

"Meats, vegetables, sprinkles"

"Sprinkles? Like the rainbow kind on icecream?"

"Yes. We carry dessert pizzas as well"

"Wow. What were the vegetables you had?"

"Spinach, onions, the like"

"Can I get meat and spinach?"

"What meat would you like?"

"Uh. Chicken?"

"Of course, sir. It will be cooked and ready in ten minutes, free of charge, of course"

"Thank you, Maria." He smiles at her.

She smiles, and heads off to begin his pizza. Dick tugs Os toward theatre one. "It'll be brought to you before the movie begins, c'mon"

"Okay. I wish there was a way I could tip her."

"Just enjoy her pizza, she get's a really great pay, I sign her checks myself"

"You are a good man." Os says, nodding.

"Thank you, I try" Dick grins, selecting a seat and pulling his wrist out of Os's pocket.

The loss of the warmth is sudden, and surprising because he'd forgotten it was there. Os takes a seat next to Dick.

Dick wraps an arm around Os's shoulders, grinning wider. "Today's gonna be really fun"

Os leans into the other, nodding. "Yeah, can't wait to see Red's face."

"We'll have footage of all of their reactions, it'll be glorious"

"Not even entirely his reaction, his face in general."

"Yeah, but I bet Jay's gonna throw his coffee across the room in frustration, and I know Bruce is probably gonna break whatever's he's holding"

"Why? Because we faked a kidnapping for pie?"

"Because this will be my 50th kidnapping," He thinks for a moment. "well, you know"

"So this this is some kind of anniversary? Do you throw some kind of party? Take a page from Oliver Queen's book and throw a kidnapping party."

"They're gonna be like 'god fucking damnit dick you should know better than walking alone by now' and then calling Babs's dad to go and find me"

"What do you think Red will say when he sees me?"

"Before or after we've revealed it was a prank?"

"When he knows it's me."

"'Oh my fucking god' Will be the first words out of his mouth. After that it's up in the air, he could either laugh, punch you, punch me, or yell."

"I'm hoping for punching you, and maybe a hug for me? I've known him a long time."

"He's not really a hugger, unless he's angling to get into your pants"

"Huh. I can't say I'd protest that."

"Yeah, and if you're me you can wrestle him into a hug with enough whining" He grins a little.

"I remember him complaining about that."

"Yeah, I'm not surprised" Dick shifts slightly, leaning back a little. Maria comes in, placing a pizza box next to Os, and leaves. The commercials start playing, the movie's about to begin. They're all 90's era Disney commercials, but really, why not.

"I remember seeing these movies as like a *teenager* I feel old as fuck."

"I'm older, I remember getting *that* one to play in my theatre, at 16"

"I'm 36, I could drink for some of these movies."

"Eh. I misjudged you, I'm 29. I still had this theatre *before* some of these came out, though"

"That is impressive, but thanks. I don't look as old as I am for how short I am, right? Also now that I know how old Red is I feel creepy."

"He's 21, a guy older than Bruce tried to marry him like, two months ago. You're fine"

"Still, I've been talking to him for a good decade."

"And he could probably rip you in two. He *did* hold his own against the head of the league of Assassins, afterall"

"What?" Os choked on a mouthful of pizza. "Do you think I meant I thought about him like that? I've known him since he was apparently eight, I wouldn't have touched him with a ten foot pole. Besides, I've been going through some shot for most of the time I knew him, I never would have gone for that. Ever. He's like a brother to me. Sort of. He knows all my baggage and will probably punch me when he sees Chicago news anyways."

Dick shrugs. "A lot of people want Timmy. forgive me for assuming" He grins a little. "ooh, it's starting"

"It's okay, I just. Okay." He turns his attention to the screen.

Dick smiles a little, grinning as the title card plays. He mumbles the intro under his breath. He might play Disney 24/7, but that doesn't mean he doesn't watch other animation studios.

Os had only seen the movie once before, and only ten minutes in the middle. It was really good.

Dick could quote the entire move, verbatim.

When the movie finished, Os had finished the entire pizza, and was halfway across the seat and leaning heavily on Dick. He'd felt his phone buzz with messages from Red a couple times a minute ever since Hiccup and Toothless met, so he assumed the package was at the house.

Dick giggled, as the movie rolled to a close. "Did you want to see Two, or do you wanna head over the manor?"

"Make 'em wait, I wanna know what happens." Os says.

"Ok! Maria, Maria! Play two for me, please? And after that, you can take a break, ok? Have fun!"

"She's awesome."

"Maria's the best" Dick giggled. Maria stuttered a thank you and did as Dick asked, playing two. She made it go straight to the pre-movie commercials, rather than waiting for it as usual. The commercials were all recent-ish Disney movies, Brave, Tangled, etc.

"How's Frozen?"

"It was wonderful, Tim got it illegally off of Disney a few months ago, and Jay got me the official release, it's really beautiful"

"Your family is beautiful."

"Yes, yes it is"

The movie starts much sooner this time, leaving hardly any silence for Os to think about his own family. He's surprised Dick hasn't asked, he's sorta been mentioning it a lot.

Dick doesn't particularly need to know, if he needs to know more about Os, he's sure Os or Tim will tell him. He grins, as the movie opens and the dragon race plays. He can't help but giggle at Ruffnut and Tuffnut.

The sequel ends up being just as fantastic as the first, but Os starts crying around when Hiccup's mom shows up, and doesn't stop for the rest of the movie.

Dick holds back a couple of sniffles of his own, rubbing his face a little. He cries outright when Stoick dies.

"That was not okay and everything hurts"

Dick sniffs, wiping his eyes. "At least he got to see his thought-to-be dead wife again, right?"

"Yes, but I thought they'd finally get to be a *family*."

"That'd be too easy. Plus they needed Hiccup to be the chief so the fastest way to do that is just kill the current one"

"Still." Os insisted.

"I agree, but I also see what they're going for. They're probably making a third"

"And I will probably see the third."

"I will most definitely own it if it exists"

"Even if it is not official, one will be made."

"Yes. So, are we going to the manor now? We can watch Frozen on Tim's laptop"

"Sure, if Tim doesn't punch me first."

"He might. I can still get the laptop off his hands, if I pout Jay will do it for me"

"I'm sure you could bribe Damian to distract Red too."

"He talked about it, apparently it's offensively pink?"

"Yeah. It used to be Cass's, but she's revoked ownership. Everything is pink, like from the walls to the curtains to the bed to the carpet"

"I think something was also mentioned about how Damian apparently likes it?"

"Dami adores it. Like a lot, I'm not sure why"

"He's probably into the color pink. I can admire that."

"Dami's a little weird, but the entire family is weird. So, coming home with me?" Dick stands up, offering his wrist.

Os takes it, and stands with him. "Sure."

Dick grins, and leads him out the theatre and toward Wayne manor. They get there around an hour later.

Jason is passively frantic, switching between calling people who have kidnapped Dick in the past (they stay close) for ideas, and he even sends- ugh- the Joker a text. But there's no answer, no clue to where his brother is.

Dick walks in, talking idly with Os as if nothing is wrong. Tim is alternating between being worried and being pissed, and Bruce has started drinking to try and keep himself calm. Tim is standing in the foyer, debating between going out to find him and staying here. He sees Dick and just sort of stands there, eye twitching.

Os knows that the short guy with black hair is Red the *moment* he sees him, and it takes literally everything not to bounce up and down and hug him because *yooo*

Tim frowns, at the blond guy Dick is with. Dick grins, when he notices Tim. "Hi, Timmy!"

"Where the hell have you been?"

Jason comes into the foyer from the living room, and walks up to Tim, because he wants to either punch Dick or kiss him and there's a short blonde kid next to him staring at Tim, and he doesn't know this person at all.

"Uh, with Os? Like, he's mentioned that, right?" He glances at Os, grinning a little. Tim's eyebrow twitches.

Os nods. "Yeah, change of plans, I didn't go grocery shopping. Hi, Red, you're the same height as me."

Tim presses two fingers to his temple. "So, the, why did we get a box proclaiming you were kidnapped?"

Dick blinked at him innocently. Tim's eyebrow twitched again. "And how did you lose your hand, if you weren't?"

Os snickered. "Can I have my shoes back?"

Tim freezes. "You! You pranked me! You little shit!"

Dick's composure shattered, and he laughed out loud.

"Please don't punch me but this is only fair we haven't talked in two whole months and you only replied when I was freaking out about an unconscious billionaire. Who happens to be your brother."

Tim growls, and Dick flinches a little, but he doesn't stop snickering. Tim gives Os a glare, before turning to Dick and punching him in the jaw.

Os takes a few seconds to let the punch sink in before he wraps his arms around his friend. Who is a decade younger and the same height as him.

Tim pats Os's back, huffing softly. Dick fixes his jaw a little, and grins at Jason. "Did we put on a good show?"

Jason makes a noise similar to a growl and walks up to Dick, grabbing him by the chin and pulling him down for a kiss.

Dick squeaks, and closes his eyes, kissing back. He pulls back a few seconds later, still grinning.

Jason grabs his brother's wrist, and shoved his hand onto it, twisting it just a bit to make it stay on. "Fuck."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://www.fontspace.com/billy-argel/candy-inc is the font in the ransom letter


	16. Chapter 16

Dick giggles. He flexes his fingers, and pecks Jason's cheek. "Thanks, Jaybird" Tim pulls back from the hug, turning on his heel. 

"Alfred made you a 'happy 50th kidnapping' cake"

Os snickered and covered his mouth. "He did it they're actually doing it."

"Yeah!" Dick giggled, going over to bump shoulders with Os. "Hey, where's Bruce?"

Jason rolls his eyes. "Drinking himself less stupid. He's wondering where he went wrong that we're celebrating a 50th kidnapping."

"Well, putting me into the public eye at the tender age of 8 was not his best move, especially since I had a habit of running away and talking to strangers"

"Yeah, the first thirty two and a half times were your fault." Jay agreed.

"Half?"

"Once he was "kidnapped" by Babs, and I'm pretty sure that was when he lost his v card. Correct me if I'm wrong, D?"

"I lost it with her, yeah. Not when she 'kidnapped' me, though. We did it earlier than that"

"Oh. Well then I just lost like, sixty bucks to Tim." Jay groaned.

Tim smirked. Dick laughed. "You should get brownie points for guessing the right partner, at least"

Os doesn't know what to contribute to the conversation, but it's hilarious without him.

Dick wrapped an arm around Os's shoulders. "So, d'ya wanna meet Bruce, or Alfie first?"

"Uh." He pauses. "Damian. I've heard a lot about him and his ass." He glances pointedly at Tim. "And his bad taste in rooms."

"Kay." He turns to Tim. "Where's Damian?" Tim shrugs.

Jay takes his phone out, and a few seconds later, chuckles. "He's naked on your bed, exhausted. He was unaware Dick was kidnapped."

Tim hums. "I'm not sharing" He heads upstairs.

Dick laughs.

"Okay, then Alfred. I'm wary of Bruce and his advice, but mostly his advice." 

Jay nods. "Literally no argument there."

Dick nods, and heads for the kitchen. When in doubt, kitchen. If Alfred isn't there already, he will be the moment someone enters his domain. Dick thinks he has motion or heat sensors planted in the doorways.

The man at the stove reminds Os of one of the people he played *pranks* on back in Chicago, and he has to grab onto Dick's arm just to stay standing and. Fuck.

Dick's arm tightens on Os's shoulders, but his grin never falters. "Hi Alfie! I'm home!"

"So I see, Master Richard"

His voice isn't the same. He doesn't even *look* the same but. Os is just filled with *guilt* at the memory of the man and. He doesn't know what to do.

"And who is your friend, Master Richard?"

"This is Os; Oswald. He's a friend of Tim's, too"

"Fascinating. Your cake is in the refrigerator, Master Bruce has not said whether you can consume anything, but I remember you saying you enjoyed the smell of chocolate"

"You're the best, Alfie"

Wow, that is actually super nice. He feels even more guilty.

Dick squeezes Os's shoulders again. "You ok?"

"No. Yes. I. I need to go talk to Tim." He disentangles himself from Dick (easier said than done) and walks as fast as he can, going up a set of stairs and trying to find Tim because. He's needed to talk for a while and it's just. Fuck.

Tim had gone up to his room, but had decided to tinker rather than play with Damian. He heard someone tromping up the stairs and peaked out, and frowned at Os. "Something the matter?"

Os is running his hands through his hair and pacing the hall and he'd ripped his jacket off a few minutes ago and he's just freaking out. "I. I fucked up Red."

Tim raises an eyebrow.

"The thing you told me not to do. About Mayor Cole. I. I did it and then I couldn't *talk* to you and I've been freaking out and hiding in a Wayne Warehouse for. For two months and. I don't know what I'm doing and I thought I was okay but I'm *not* and." he takes a deep breath.

Tim presses two fingers to his temple. "...Wonderful, come here, my room's the only un-bugged room in the manor. Don't look at Damian, he's indecent and underage"

"He's also yours and you're like my brother so. Wasn't planning on looking. I just." He kicks off his shoes and walks forwards. "I'm sorry "

Tim pulls him into a hug, running is fingers through Os's hair. "I'm betting you haven't told Dick"

"I hinted at it because I don't want him to get invested if the police find me. I just. He got the warehouse signed over to him from your Dad."

"Not surprised, he likes you. And he was ok with giving you his hand, so I'm betting you cured his denial. You've done more good for him in less than 24 hours than Bruce or the rest of us have in all the years we've known him"

"He was curled up in the warehouse, freaking out about the noise and I got him earmuffs but then I saw the seam and, he was so *beautiful* and I've never seen someone so perfect and he was letting me touch him and he listened to me and. Was that really so much?" he leans into his friend.

"He's spent the last 29 years violently suppressing every scrap of information pertaining to his status as a robot and how it makes him feel fake. You fanboying about how well-made he is apparently made him think 'if some kid I don't know thinks i'm real, maybe I am, regardless of origin' which is something *none* of us have been able to teach or convince him."

"He didn't believe he was real? How could he not? He's more real than anyone I've ever met, you all are because you're *perfect* and you're just made a different way. And there's so much effort and love put into you, how could you, and Dick and Jason, be anything *but* real?"

"Dick doesn't believe anything until it's either presented in a way he can't deny it or he's forced on him until there's no other alternative. He felt that since he wasn't human he wasn't real."

Os makes a noise of anger and disapproval, but doesn't move to get out of the hug.

"Looks like you fixed it, so thanks"

" 're welcome. Can I take a nap? I was coding last night and today was a roller coaster. The fun kind."

"Dick's room is two doors that way. Have fun"

"Is that a good idea? I sorta just ran out after meeting Alfred to come find you and freak out."

"Jay's room is off limits, Damian's is offensive, and the other rooms aren't furnished."

Os thinks for a moment. "May I see the offensive room first?"

"Across the hall"

Os turns to move across the hall, open the door, stare for a moment, then close the door wordlessly. 

"Which one was Dick's, again?"

"Two doors to the left."

Os nods, but pauses. "Are you mad that I went through with the Mayor Cole thing?"

"I would be, but you cured Dick so I'm ignoring it because you helped my big brother"

He nods. "I can feel that. I'm going to go sleep, thank you. And if he asks, you can tell him everything."

Tim nods, and returns to tinkering with the arm he was building. It was officially an arm, now. 

Dick wanders upstairs ten minutes later with a piece of cake.

Os had taken the pants off, and curled up under the sheets in just his shirt and boxers. He's already asleep, and he's not having a nightmare but he's not dreaming either. The only thing that gives away anything weird is that, even though the room is mostly dark, he still make sure the pillows and blankets are over his head. His legs are tucked up into his chest too, and one arm is under his head while the other is peeking out of the covers, wrapping around the pillows and unconsciously holding them down.

Dick walks into his room, and pauses at the sight of Os. He blinks, and sets the cake down on his desks and sits on the chair there. He glances around the room wordlessly.

Os doesn't wake up, but his phone buzzes with a notification from a Chicago online newsletter, one dedicated to police work and news. The article he is getting notified of is how the Chicago police have a lead on the "Prankster", a mysterious man who murdered the mayor and two other people. They apparently now believe he may be on the east coast, and are collaborating with authorities in major cities there to gain more information.

If he was awake, Os would definitely be panicking.

Dick hears the phone, and picks it up. He stares at the article, a little confused. He prods Os's shoulder. "Hey. Os?"

He groans, but doesn't wake up, merely pulling his arm down into the safety of the blankets.

Dick pokes him in the side. "There's a police report on your phone"

The word police snaps him awake, and his hand exits the blankets to grab for the phone. When he does not immediately grab it, he lets his arm fall down. "What is it?"

"Something about a Prankster? And the death of the mayor?"

Os makes a noise that's a cross between a whimper, a whine, and a groan. "They don't let go of anything, do they?"

Dick tilts his head. "It says they have a lead he might be on the east coast. Who is he?"

"A dumb kid who had a choice and chose *wrong* because he never let go of something that happened when he was twelve."

"...This sounds a little too specific, do you know him personally?"

Os laughs dryly, and retracts his arm. "Yes. Annoyingly well. He's short and likes jokes and programming and wears heels and has an Internet friend in Gotham and he's *me* and I fucked up."

"Oh." Dick looks at him for a moment. "...I could probably arrange to have the charges removed"

"You don't have to, but also *why*? You literally just read what happened and. You're just willing to help me. And I don't get it."

"You're my friend, you obviously regret it, they provoked it, and I *like* you. I can't visit you if you're in a prison in Chicago. Or in Arkham."

"I'm not arguing with the provoked part. Curtain number one ran a child trafficking ring, curtain number two sold faulty anti-lightning insulation and caused dozens of deaths, and curtain number three killed my father and became mayor, letting a criminal who, among other things, murdered a couple of circus performers and other innocents be his second in command. So. Provoked, yes. But still."

"Circus performers?" Dick pauses. He has, more than likely fabricated, memories of circus performers, who were is parents. They were killed in an accident. "Anyway. My offer stands, plus, honestly, the place is probably better off without them. We could get Tim to help too, if we ask for the right favors"

"He's the one who actually stopped me from doing it sooner, and the only reason he's not mad I did it at all is because I helped you."

Dick blinked. "huh. Well, we can still ask for help, there's a chance he'll say you earned it, but there's also a chance he'll help"

Os emerged from the blankets, and nodded. "Okay. Should we go talk to him now?"

"His door was closed."

"Does that mean he's having sex and is only to be disturbed under threat of possible death?"

"Probably"

Os nodded. "What do you want to do then?"

"Well, uh. I brought you cake?" He turns, and picks up the piece he'd brought earlier. "I haven't run into Bruce yet so I don't know if I can eat it, but it smells good"

"You should go ask if you can eat now. Also, are the smells more intense?"

"A little. I'll go find him, save some for me just in case" He hands over the plate, with a fork balanced on it, and left the room.

Os nods, taking the plate and getting a bite of cake. It's fantastic, fluffy and light and just the right amount of *everything*.

Dick finds Bruce in his second study, muttering at a bottle of wine.

Bruce hears someone enter, but doesn't look up immediately. When he does, he sighs in relief. "You're back."

"It was a prank. Thanks for the cake, by the way. I came to ask if I'm capable of eating it?"

"Yes, you can eat and drink. Even alcohol. Care for a glass?"

"Not really, but you should probably stop drinking. Your liver can't take that much abuse, B"

"I drink because my sons seem to get kidnapped more than I get propositions, which is saying something."

"I hold the record, but this time was a joke. I didn't realize 'til after we sent the package it was my 50th. I feel accomplished"

"Seriously? That's an *accomplishment* to you?"

"It makes me feel wanted. Plus this time I had a say in what happened. Did you actually read the ransom? We asked for pie"

"I saw the box with you *hand* in it and left the room. Alfred took care of the last thirty, he took care of this one too."

"I gave it willingly?"

Bruce blinked in confusion. "How?"

Dick pulled off his hand, then offered it to Bruce.

"Does that mean..." Bruce stares at the hand. "Does that mean you're aware now?"

Dick nods.

"Oh. What pushed that one?"

"Os helped. He got really excited when he saw my neck seam"

"Os?"

"Friend I made today. The prank was his idea, he's a friend of Tim's"

"Tim knows people outside of us?" Bruce looks even more confused.

"They met on the internet, met face-to-face for the first time today" Dick pauses. "And you *know* Tim has friends outside the family. Kon? Bart? Stephanie? Ring any bells?"

"I've drunk atleast six bottles of wine within three hours, give me a break."

Dick reaches over and takes the bottle. "Then I'm cutting you off. Alfie made me cake, you should go try some"

Bruce doesn't say anything for a long moment, then gets up. "What flavor?"

"He said it was chocolate, 'cause I made a comment 'bout liking the smell. Os seemed to like it, earlier"

Bruce nodded. "Okay."

Dick put the bottle on the desk and grabbed Bruce's arm. "C'mon downstairs, maybe later Os'll want ta meetcha"

He nods and stands, and is so surprised that he didn't stumble that he stumbles.

Dick catches him, pulling him upright and draping his arm over Dick's shoulders. "C'mon, ya big lug. Cake time" He herds Bruce downstairs, to the kitchen.

Bruce almost trips on the stairs, but his son keeps him upright. Once downstairs, Bruce is given a glass of milk and a large slice of cake. It doesn't help with the sluggishness or the cake, but it's better than nothing.

Dick smiles, at Bruce, grabs a fork and pecks Alfred on the cheek, before heading back upstairs to see if Os left him any.

Os hadn't eaten much of the cake, because he was waiting for Dick to come back.

Dick peaked into the room, and smiled broadly. "Is it good?"

"Delicious. Was I right?"

"He said I can eat stuff, and is also very pleased and very drunk"

"Okay, then c'mere, we can split the rest."

Dick walks into the room, hefting the fork he'd nabbed, and sat back in the computer chair. He made grabby hands at the plate.

Os pushed the plate over on the bed, closer to Dick.

Dick scraped a bit of cake onto his fork, and took a bite. He hummed, at the taste.

"It's good?"

"Mmhmm. Wow, that's really good, tastes as good as it smells"

"Is there a lot that you need to try?"

"Yeah. But we can start with that twinkie you offered earlier, not that anything that unhealthy is in the manor, Alfred doesn't allow it"

"Okay, it's back at the warehouse."

"Yep. We can either go there now or wait 'til tomorrow"

"Wait sounds good."

"You look really tired." He notes offhandedly. "I don't really *need* to sleep, so you can keep the bed"

"Yeah, but if you want to lay down, I'm not opposed to it either."

"If I get in that bed, there will be cuddling. Are you up for it?"

"Yes."

Dick puts the plate on the desk, and pulls off his damp sweater, and then clambers onto the bed and cuddles up to Os's side. "You're tiny"

Os moves the covers out from under Dick and pulls it over him, and rolls his eyes. "You're *just* realizing that?" He pulls a pillow up, and puts it over his head.

"I haven't picked you up and twirled you around yet. I should fix that" He squeezes Os a little. "But for now, cuddle time"

Os hums and closes his eyes, feeling safer than he has in a long time. He knows that Red is just down the hall, that no one can get him here.

Dick hums softly, cuddling up a little more. He's out in a few minutes.

It takes Os a bit longer, but he does fall asleep quicker than normal.


	17. Chapter 17

Jason wakes up the good way, alone in his room with the sunlight filtering in slowly. For whatever reason, Trumpets by Jason Derulo is playing softly. He stands and walks to the window, stretching his muscles and just listening to his surroundings. He opens the window, and the curtains puff out in response to the soft breeze. He turns and grabs a pair of sweatpants, deciding to go bother Dick (who is probably awake already). They were supposed to go see Eska last month, and he wants to see her again. All he has are vague memories of the ballroom and being rocked to sleep by her large, gray trunk, climbing up onto her wide, leathery back, learning that he doesn't like peanuts, and giving them to her. And it's been a good two decades since then, he can't wait.

Dick is actually still asleep, curled around Os like a very cuddly boa constrictor.

Watching them, Jason is strangely okay with it. In fact, a lot of him wants to lay down and cuddle too. But, he decides that would be creepy and goes to bother Tim instead.

"Timmy? Tim? Timbo? Timmiffer?" He asks as he lays down on the bed, draping himself over Tim.

Tim groans. Eventually he'd gotten up and cuddled with Damian, but he couldn't have been asleep for more than an hour when Jason starts bothering him. He glares and growls at his brother before rolling over.

"Tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim" Jay groans, making grabby hands. "It's not even early! It's like, late."

"I went to bed an hour ago, Jason. Go bother Dick."

"But Dick's wrapped around the short one."

"And Damian is hugging me. I'm sure Dick will be happy to let you join, Jay"

"Yeah but, I've only talked to the blonde one that one time. And I could barely see him under the pillows and blankets, half of me was expecting it to be you, except not really."

Tim grunted. "Either you can leave and bother Dick or you can stay and shut up. I'm not in the mood to be awake anymore."

Jason opts to shut up, and closes his eyes. Unfortunately, however, he can't sleep, and gets sort of bored. He traces shapes on Tim's back, compares their skin, runs his hands through his hair.

Tim grumbles, and rolls so Damian is between them. He's ticklish, sue him.

Jason grins. Damian's probably his favorite, skinwise atleast, because he's just straight up *darker* than them. In the wrong lighting, he looks white, but he's not, and it's great. Jason trails his fingers up and down Damian's spine, chuckling under his breath when his brother's back arches away.

Tim grunts, when he feels Damian arch. He reaches out and finds a phone, and shoves it in Jason's direction.

Jay takes the phone, but keeps a hand on Damian's hip. He sees that it is, in fact, Damian's phone, and goes through it until... Ah yes. Hm. The camera roll is full of selfies, half with Tim, some with Cass, and one with Dick, sort of. Damian isn't looking at the camera in that one, so it's safe to assume he wasn't the one taking that selfie. Jason then exits out of that and checks the messages. "Dami, Cass wants to know if you still want a tattoo on your hip."

No response from Damian.

Tim grunts. He pulls Damian a bit closer. "Tattoos can wait."

Damian hums and wraps an arm around Tim. Jason sighs and gets up. "Yeah, I'm gonna go. Bother Dick."

Tim snuggles closer to Damian. "Have fun, Jay. Leave the phone on the desk"

He had been very tempted to just leave with it, maybe leave some selfies on it, but nods. "Got it."

Tim grunts.

Jason sets the phone down, and goes to Dick's room.

Dick is sort of awake now, but still curled around Os. He's thinking about getting up, but it's very comfortable in the bed.

Jason slides into bed behind Dick, wrapping an arm around him. Os was sort of awake but not really, and the new sorta-cold hand against his back makes him hum in confusion.

Dick pauses. "Jaybird?"

"I want to see Eska again."

"...I do need to go see her..."

"Does the blonde one wanna come?"

... Blonde one? Oh. That's Os. He vaguely remembers hearing about Eska, an elephant, and can't come up with an argument against it.

Dick grunts. "Os? Do you wanna meet my other baby?"

Os hums again, nodding under the mound of pillows. He doesn't know if Dick sees.

Dick feels the shift of the pillows and takes it as a yes. "Do Timmy or Dami wanna come?"

"They're asleep. Trying. Dami might go get another tatt."

Dick grunts. "So just the three of us? Ok. Are we taking a car, or are we walking?"

"Car. I'm driving. We may need clothes though, it's 2 o'clock."

Dick grunts. "You have your own room, go change. Os can borrow something of Timmy's"

"And this is the not fun part where I leave." Jay yawns and gets up.

Dick turns, and pulls Jason down for a peck on the cheek. "It's for the greater good, Jay"

Jay smiles and hums. "Greater good is not seeing you mostly naked? How bad can I possibly be?"

"Either you go get dressed and miss me getting naked or we don't get to see Eska until tomorrow, so..." Dick sits up, rubbing his face tiredly.

"Eh, Eska's more important than your ass." Jay turns and walks out of the room.

Dick hums. "So, are you ready to be awake, yet?" He asks, standing up and trying to find some clean clothes safe to wear in an elephant encounter.

Os mumbles something incoherent, then pushes the pillows off. They end up falling back on him though, so it's like a never ending circle. Push a pillow away, have it fall back on top, try to get up, fail, repeat.

"Your bed wants to keep me."

Dick laughs, and walks over, picking the pillow up. "That help?"

"Yes. Now, about the other twelve?"

Dick laughed, and drops the pillow behind Os, before grabbing his hand and yanking him up. "There. Good?"

"Yes. Good. Much better."

Dick hums, before going and digging through his closet.

"Do I have to go bother Tim for his clothing?"

"Or you could ask Alfie if he has any hidden around the manor"

"That's too much work, I don't want him to look for it. I'll just go bother Tim."

"Have fun" Dick pulls out a pink and green plaid shirt. "Ooh."

Os gets out of the bed and goes down the hall to Tim's room. He doesn't actually say a word to Tim, he just grabs a shirt and a pair of pants and doesn't look at the bed. Tim has complained about people bothering him when he's sleeping for years, so he figures this is better than the alternative.

Tim wakes up to see Os grabbing his clothes. He rolls back over and goes back to sleep.

Os goes back into Dick's room and puts the clothing on. He finds that the shirt is just green, and the pants just jeans. Good. Nondescript and comfy.

Dick is decked out in that pink/green plaid shirt, and a pair of black jeans. He grins at Os. "Hi!"

"Hi." Jason comes into the room wearing a led zeppelin shirt, leather jacket, and jeans, and grins. "Hi."

"Jay, d'ya think Eska will remember you?"

"Hopefully."

Dick nods. He grabs Os's hand, and leads him down to the garage.

Jay walks slightly behind them, because he can't keep up with Dick.

Dick is practically skipping down the stairs.

Os tries to get out of his grip, because he can't really go that fast, but Jason just puts a hand on his back to help.

After a bit Dick decides to just pick Os up and have him ride on his shoulders.

Jason snorts. Os doesn't even *reach* the ceiling. He's so short.

Dick hums to himself, as he goes to the garage. Once there he lets Os back down to his feet, and waits for Jay to pick a car.

Jay is sadly aware that the key he is holding in his hand fits every single car Bruce has ever bought him. How, he's unsure, but Bruce did it. He opts for the red version of the lancer evolution, though, from several years ago. Maybe ten? Maybe five? He doesn't remember.

Dick grins, and picks the back seat. Os can sit where he likes.

Os picks the passenger seat, and Jay grins to himself as he starts it up. The engine purrs like one of Damian's cats, loud and proud. "You get music, here." He passes Os the audio jack, and starts to pull forwards, out of the garage.

Dick hums, watching the world go by. It's not as fast as he likes, but he's not driving, either.

Os isn't used to being in things that go very fast, so he's holding onto the "oh shit" handle and practically blasting the arctic monkeys soundtrack that everyone on the internet has been screaming about.

Dick laughed at Os's face.

"Dick shut up" Jay yells over the music.

"But *Jay*!" Dick grins widely. "Ooh! Ooh! We're almost here, floor it!!"

And Jason does, passing the police commissioner's car as he does. There's a few seconds where none of his tires are actually touching the asphalt, and he takes that opportunity to turn and wave at Commish Gordon.

Dick peaks out of the window and waves at Barbara. "Hey Babs! Hi Babs!!"

Os looks at the Commissioner in clear horror.

Babs puts her face in her hands, and her father sighs tiredly.

The car lands all at once, Jason cackling maniacally.

Dick is laughing too, cackling loudly.

Os is breathing heavily and leaning against the door, humming along to "Do I Wanna Know" frantically.

Dick laughs loudly. He reaches over and pats Os's shoulder.

Os was not prepared for this. He never asked to be in a car with two Waynes.

Dick continued to cackling. He grinned at Jay. "Do you want me to pay for admission?"

"Yeah, sure." Jay pulls into the parking spot reserved for Waynes.

Os stares in disbelief. They have a parking spot?

Dick giggled, pulling out his card, including an employee's gold card. In his name.

Now, Os had seen a lot of things. He had seen some things that were satisfying, like the last gasp of Mayor Cole. He'd seen some things that were attractive, like the seams on Dick's body. He'd accidentally come across some things he didn't want to see, like the porn side of tumblr, but he'd also seen some pretty cool videos of pranks. He had not, however, ever seen a gold card _for a zoo_.

Dick grinned at Os. "You're speechless already? You haven't even met the pretty girl yet!"

Os shook his head. "Too much in too little time."

Dick snorted. "C'mon, Eska awaits!!" He grabs Os's wrist, leading him toward the front gates.

Jason follows, grinning as he takes it all in. Last time he'd been to the *zoo* he'd been uncomfortable and sad and almost twelve, now he was comfortable, probably not sad, and way past twelve. His life had definitely improved.

Dick waved at the workers, and gave the lady working the ticket booth his cards. She rang him up, with a soft "Hello Mister Grayson, it's nice to see you up and about again". He smiles. "Thanks, Sherry"

Os smiled at her, and Jason winked when he passed.

"Hello again, Mister Todd" She waved. Dick giggled. "Has she been moved again, Sherry?"

"Not yet, Mister Grayson. But she does have a friend, now. His name is Maxamillion"

Jason nodded. "His? Wonder how close they are."

Dick leads the way, and the moment he enters the encounter the female elephant trumpets, and she tromps over. He grins. "Hey, pretty girl! Sorry I'm late. I brought friends"

Jason lights up genuinely when he sees her. Eska's beautiful, and he can't help but laugh. "s been a long time, Eska."

Os isn't sure how to react. He's starting to think tagging along was a bad idea.

Eska trumpets, when she sees Jason, and Dick steps out of the way so she can wrap her trunk around him and cuddle him close. Dick laughs loudly. "She remembers you, Jay! I knew she would!"

Jason wraps his arms around her too, hiding his smile in her big, leathery trunk. Eska smells like childhood, like safety and warmth and honey and grass. And, she's Dick's. She's perfect and safe and just as much apart of the family as he is.

Dick pets her side lightly, leaning into her slightly. Maxamillion wanders over, lightly nudging Os curiously.

Os can deal with this. He can deal with new things. He turns and lays his hand down on the elephant's trunk, and then he takes a moment to study him like he'd studied Dick the day before. "Hello," he says when he pats Maxamillion's shoulder.

Maxamillion murmurs, lightly patting his head. Eska picks Jason up, depositing him on her back, and nuzzles Dick lightly.

Jason cuddles her head, and he can hear the delighted screams of children from somewhere he doesn't care about. Part of him just wants to lay there forever, because she's comfy and perfect.

Os chuckles. "Eska seems nice. I think it's amazing, every Wayne is just so interesting. And, she's definitely a Wayne. What do you think?"

Dick nods. "She's my baby girl, I raised her since she was 2 weeks old" He pets her trunk lightly. "Max seems nice, too. That scar on his ear is interesting"

Os hadn't noticed it, and he cranes his neck to look, but before he knows it he's being lifted up, a very firm trunk under his ass. He gasps, and his hands fly to steady himself on Max. "H-hey, yeah, huh." He leans forwards when he thinks he's balanced, fingers running over the edges of the scar, high up in his ear. "Hm."

Eska pats Dick's hair, before reaching out and prodding Os with her trunk. Dick laughs.

Max deposits Os on his back, and he looks around. Across from him is Jason, cuddling Eska's head and scratching behind her ear and generally ignoring the world. Dick, as tall as he is, looks less tall. Somehow.

Dick grins up at him. Eska twines her trunk with Max's, and he can't help the low whistle. "Eska! You didn't tell me you found anyone!" He was still grinning, and the way she lightly pushed him over said she knew he was joking. "I'm happy for you!" He giggles.

Os mimics Jason and scratches behind Max's ear. "Yeah, good for you too."

Dick notices children watching them from the visitor's window, and waves. There's a muffled cheer from the crowd.

Os glances up at the kids. Oh. Of course, they're in a zoo. And he's on the back of an elephant. "Uh, Max, is it okay if I get down?"

Max pulls his trunk from Eska's, to gently put Os down again, before twining them together again. Dick grins.

Os stays next to Max, leaning against his leg and watching the pair. Part of him wants to ask how long they'll be there, but most of him is just really happy that these elephants are happy.

Dick kisses Eska's knee, smiling up at her widely. She murmurs at him, lightly nudging him with her leg. He shoves back, and it devolves into a shoving match.

Os pets Max's knee absentmindedly, watching Dick.

Eska pushes him over, and Dick laughs loudly, as she pushed him over.

Os snorts.

Eska murmurs, probably laughing. Dick wrestles with her foot for a minute, and manages to roll out from under it.

Jason is jostled by their exchange, and cracks an eye open. "Dick you're ruining me going down memory lane."

"I can play with my baby whenever I want, and you visit her whenever, too. Talk to Sherry, she'll set you up with a card like mine" He shoves at Eska's leg, and she lifted it, making him fall forward.

"Am I allowed to just come here when the manor's too loud and nap?"

"Sure" Dick grunts from underneath Eska.

Jason hums. "I'll have to do that. Eska, I promise there won't be as big of a gap til next time i see you."

Eska trumpets, patting him lightly.

Max's trunk comes down to rub Os' shoulder, and he smiles. "I'll come back too."

Dick giggles. He gets up, and walks up to pat Max's knee, too. "I'd like to get to know you too, big guy"

Max trumpets and ruffles Dick's hair.

Dick giggles.


End file.
